After a pill and copious amounts of alcohol last night, I thought it would be a great idea to try G. Then again, after a pill and copious amounts of alcohol almost everything feels like a good idea
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I'm sorry that you feel the need to project your own drug-related insecurities onto others. I understand you have reason to be distrustful of such things, but wonder whether negative experiences may affect your judgement (although it may well be argued that drugs are affecting mine, haha.) I am sad that Nathan is gone, but that has nothing to do with my drug use. You say that I piggyback sadness to events as though I were taking drugs as a form of escapism. It isn't, it's a form of discovery and self-awareness.
As for ruining my life, I fail to see how living in whichever form I choose is ruining anything at all. I suppose that it all depends on what one wishes to gain out of life. Some wish to gain fame, fortune and success (for whatever reasons) whereas others just wish for the experience and are overjoyed at getting the opportunity to discover life in all its forms and functions. I simply value life differently I suppose.
I don't expect you to understand, simply because you don't really want to. A life unlived is a life wasted. I wish to experience and learn all that I can, while I can. If that is ruining my life then I wonder what living meaningfully and purposefully could possibly be?
I hate to say this, but I took a lot more drugs before you met me, and while I knew you than I do nowadays. I always think of the "old tom", as the self I was before I moved to Sydney (the me you've never known.) And I know that he approves of my actions, for he was far more maliciously self-destructive than I am. For I have found a certain contentment and beauty in the world that did not exist before.
I thank you for your concern though. *hugs* It takes a strong person to tell others when you think they are going wrong, and you are definately a very strong-willed individual. Even if you don't wish to talk to me because you diossapprove of my actions, it's nice to know you still care.
You can 'live life' without being a prostitute who takes drugs. Even if you did want to experience the life of a drug taking prostitute. You've done it now. Move on.
Correction: I cared once. I don't now. I was checking to see if you'd pulled yourself together, of if you were still on some disgusting crusade to destroy yourself. I did a google search for Forget Eden and your live journal came up, because you had mentioned the band in one of your posts. That was the extent of how I stumbled across it. I have more important things to do, than read your daily blabberings.
Drugs kill people. Ask Nathan, oh wait, you can't, because he's DEAD.
And you are just plane selfish, for not respecting him enough to learn from his mistakes.
"I have more important things to do, than read your daily blabberings."
..Again, obviously NOT. Go cut yourself or write a song or call your fag hag or listen to Dashboard. Or do it all in one day and write a song about it.
As for ruining my life, I fail to see how living in whichever form I choose is ruining anything at all. I suppose that it all depends on what one wishes to gain out of life. Some wish to gain fame, fortune and success (for whatever reasons) whereas others just wish for the experience and are overjoyed at getting the opportunity to discover life in all its forms and functions. I simply value life differently I suppose.
I don't expect you to understand, simply because you don't really want to. A life unlived is a life wasted. I wish to experience and learn all that I can, while I can. If that is ruining my life then I wonder what living meaningfully and purposefully could possibly be?
I hate to say this, but I took a lot more drugs before you met me, and while I knew you than I do nowadays. I always think of the "old tom", as the self I was before I moved to Sydney (the me you've never known.) And I know that he approves of my actions, for he was far more maliciously self-destructive than I am. For I have found a certain contentment and beauty in the world that did not exist before.
I thank you for your concern though. *hugs* It takes a strong person to tell others when you think they are going wrong, and you are definately a very strong-willed individual. Even if you don't wish to talk to me because you diossapprove of my actions, it's nice to know you still care.
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Correction: I cared once. I don't now. I was checking to see if you'd pulled yourself together, of if you were still on some disgusting crusade to destroy yourself. I did a google search for Forget Eden and your live journal came up, because you had mentioned the band in one of your posts. That was the extent of how I stumbled across it. I have more important things to do, than read your daily blabberings.
Drugs kill people. Ask Nathan, oh wait, you can't, because he's DEAD.
And you are just plane selfish, for not respecting him enough to learn from his mistakes.
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..Again, obviously NOT. Go cut yourself or write a song or call your fag hag or listen to Dashboard. Or do it all in one day and write a song about it.
xxxx
jB
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