(no subject)
here i am, still at school.
i'm always rushing things, you'd think i learn, but i don't.
why should you rush things?
the things you want after the thing you rushed is never better.
really, how many things have you rushed and they turned out to be better?
rushing senior year for what? nothing really.
rushing the summer for college start? what did i gain?
rushing for my last couple of weeks to be over? a summer that won't be any better than the last or the year before.
i like how i rush this weekend with jenna in my head. i want this week to come so i can rush this so i can go home. i'll go home for what? no one will be home that weekend. i have no job, and really don't find looking for one exciting. friends? working, other friends, other interests.
really what can you expect though? we are growing older with different things we want. some of us have grown up in different ways that others haven't. it sucks.
rushing high school was bad.
rushing being little was bad.
rushing time is bad.
RUSHING THINGS STINK.
slow down.
i won't. i don't think i can. i don't know if thats optimism. for some reason i think its fake optimism. i want whatsever next, hoping its better, and that rushes it.
i keep thinking things and you'd think i'd stop thinking that way. in so many ways its disappointing. some things never change, and i hate to think that it can't or it won't.
why can't things just work out? or change? or be better? or easier?
because life sometimes is that way.
so, i'm going to probably rush this week, waiting to go home. then once i'm there i'll be rushing for school to start so i can do things differently. then i can rush for winter break. rush for school and rush the rest of my life away. then everything will be a big blur.
peace out.
i'm always rushing things, you'd think i learn, but i don't.
why should you rush things?
the things you want after the thing you rushed is never better.
really, how many things have you rushed and they turned out to be better?
rushing senior year for what? nothing really.
rushing the summer for college start? what did i gain?
rushing for my last couple of weeks to be over? a summer that won't be any better than the last or the year before.
i like how i rush this weekend with jenna in my head. i want this week to come so i can rush this so i can go home. i'll go home for what? no one will be home that weekend. i have no job, and really don't find looking for one exciting. friends? working, other friends, other interests.
really what can you expect though? we are growing older with different things we want. some of us have grown up in different ways that others haven't. it sucks.
rushing high school was bad.
rushing being little was bad.
rushing time is bad.
RUSHING THINGS STINK.
slow down.
i won't. i don't think i can. i don't know if thats optimism. for some reason i think its fake optimism. i want whatsever next, hoping its better, and that rushes it.
i keep thinking things and you'd think i'd stop thinking that way. in so many ways its disappointing. some things never change, and i hate to think that it can't or it won't.
why can't things just work out? or change? or be better? or easier?
because life sometimes is that way.
so, i'm going to probably rush this week, waiting to go home. then once i'm there i'll be rushing for school to start so i can do things differently. then i can rush for winter break. rush for school and rush the rest of my life away. then everything will be a big blur.
peace out.