Oh darling.... walk a mile with me........
she seems so grown now,
they all do.
i have always felt old, in a sense, like an old soul, floating through eternity.
always i feel like my spirit is tired but excited for the next thing, yet still clings to the here and now as if it were law and procedure to do so.
my friends are growing and realizing their poor cycles, i know mine and work daily to not let them fulfill themselves.
when focusing on the here and now hurts too much tho, i focus on the past. At this point, i can not even look forward to the future and say, HEY MAN at least at THAT EXACT POINT!!! U will be happy!
but looking back at the past i can say, hey drew, right there, remember when you had ur kneecap dislocated? THAT was the most PHYSICAL pain you have EVER felt, and as long as whatever i may be experiencing at the time seems more bareable as long as it isnt worse than that.
The COLDEST i have EVER been was in the front of my dads boat when i was 14, in shorts and a tshirt with cold winds and sleet pounding the boat as we fished.
this works for most things in my life.
i know when i was the saddest,
i know the longest emotional night of my life,
i know when i had the least control, and when i had the most focus.
i know when i was the happiest.......
and it is that last one that brings me down all the time, because i may not be having even close to the worst days of my life in any aspect, but fuck if these are even close to the happiest days i have ever experienced on earth.
is that what maturing is?
is this what growing up means?
that i am damned to mediocre days of droning on waiting for a position to advance myself... patience
i shall wait for the moment and seize it like the last dieing breath of sanity.
then i shall be mature and grown
?
?
?
right?
the man, the myth, the legend...............'cause i'm drew fry goddammitt
they all do.
i have always felt old, in a sense, like an old soul, floating through eternity.
always i feel like my spirit is tired but excited for the next thing, yet still clings to the here and now as if it were law and procedure to do so.
my friends are growing and realizing their poor cycles, i know mine and work daily to not let them fulfill themselves.
when focusing on the here and now hurts too much tho, i focus on the past. At this point, i can not even look forward to the future and say, HEY MAN at least at THAT EXACT POINT!!! U will be happy!
but looking back at the past i can say, hey drew, right there, remember when you had ur kneecap dislocated? THAT was the most PHYSICAL pain you have EVER felt, and as long as whatever i may be experiencing at the time seems more bareable as long as it isnt worse than that.
The COLDEST i have EVER been was in the front of my dads boat when i was 14, in shorts and a tshirt with cold winds and sleet pounding the boat as we fished.
this works for most things in my life.
i know when i was the saddest,
i know the longest emotional night of my life,
i know when i had the least control, and when i had the most focus.
i know when i was the happiest.......
and it is that last one that brings me down all the time, because i may not be having even close to the worst days of my life in any aspect, but fuck if these are even close to the happiest days i have ever experienced on earth.
is that what maturing is?
is this what growing up means?
that i am damned to mediocre days of droning on waiting for a position to advance myself... patience
i shall wait for the moment and seize it like the last dieing breath of sanity.
then i shall be mature and grown
?
?
?
right?
the man, the myth, the legend...............'cause i'm drew fry goddammitt