a chance
So today's a little better. There is a chance that Steven and I will be okay....I need to give him a couple of days to think....I don't have an option, here. But if that's what he needs, then so be it. It's just so fragile with him...So many little random things could flip everything so....truly scary...
But I'm a little more optimistic, now. Scared, shaken, but at least not uncontrollably shaking... but looking up, anyway...So fucking scared, though...
God this is pathetic. A year ago, I was happily single, more than set on it, and planning on being that way for the rest of my life. Spent my life as a hermit, doing what I wished, when I wished, with no thought to anyone else. Slaving for the car I loved. Working 60-65 hours a week. Being me. Taking trips to the woods by myself.... Working toward the ultimate goal of getting away and being a true hermit...And now....yeah. But I love him. I cannot help it.
But I'm a little more optimistic, now. Scared, shaken, but at least not uncontrollably shaking... but looking up, anyway...So fucking scared, though...
God this is pathetic. A year ago, I was happily single, more than set on it, and planning on being that way for the rest of my life. Spent my life as a hermit, doing what I wished, when I wished, with no thought to anyone else. Slaving for the car I loved. Working 60-65 hours a week. Being me. Taking trips to the woods by myself.... Working toward the ultimate goal of getting away and being a true hermit...And now....yeah. But I love him. I cannot help it.