when the last 8 years... 8 months and... $10,000 catch up with you...
you can't help but be exhausted and overwhelmed. i am so confused on what to do and where to go. i feel like if i would have taken care of things as they came i would have been able to save myself from this "hell" i'm dealing with. i can only do what i can and what i want but i continue to try to please everyone and ask everyones advice. i have the tendency to take on more than i can handle and always say "it'll be ok, we'll get thru this"... then i break down and feel like i've lost everything and my life is over... 2 days later its back to the way it always has been.
why haven't i been able to grow up and accept my consequences? i push everything behind me... i'm poor and then rich the first few days after i get paid... i'm depressed and then extremely happy... i hate my job and then i love my job... i hate the way i look and then i don't care.... am i never satisfied? or do i just pretend that the negative isn't really happening and i'm just having a bad day?
i want so badly to be optimistic and happy. i need to overcome this. i am not helping myself or the people i love... please help me, please turn me in the right direction. i need to get things settled. i NEED to.
why haven't i been able to grow up and accept my consequences? i push everything behind me... i'm poor and then rich the first few days after i get paid... i'm depressed and then extremely happy... i hate my job and then i love my job... i hate the way i look and then i don't care.... am i never satisfied? or do i just pretend that the negative isn't really happening and i'm just having a bad day?
i want so badly to be optimistic and happy. i need to overcome this. i am not helping myself or the people i love... please help me, please turn me in the right direction. i need to get things settled. i NEED to.