Comments | mtlawson: Be Careful What you Wish For

mtlawson

Be Careful What you Wish For

Jan 15, 2010 17:32

Nine years ago, I abandoned my software development job for my current position as an IT security administrator. While life as a code jockey was fun, it also meant long hours away from home; there was a stretch of some months in 1998 where I worked an average of 80 hours a week on a critical project that was behind schedule. There were years ( Read more... )

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tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 00:33:41 UTC

Wow that is a CRAZY job story. You got me thinking (something I try to avoid as much as possible). I read just about everything. I tend to like protagonist who overcome odds or stand up against the man. I tend to be an encourager (I bet you hadn't noticed ;)). And I tend to push at the rules if the rules don't serve the best interest of many.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 01:44:18 UTC

Yeah, when I was working those 80 hour weeks, there were two things that kept me going (besides coffee): personal pride at providing quality work and the promise of a big bonus for completing the project to all who volunteered to rescue the sinking ship. In the end, all I got out of it was my pride in knowing I got the job done. The bonus evaporated into the ether when poorer than expected earnings were reported.

The adrenaline rush of being on projects like that is very addictive, but doesn't help your marital relations one whit. Quite a few developers at my former employer were divorced, and looking back on it I can see why.

tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 01:49:00 UTC

Such jobs often make people define the word success. Is it being a loved employee or being loved/loving someone.

I tell people my biggest lesson in grad school was learning to keep myself and my relationships a priority.

I heard a great quote in church a few weeks ago: You should not fear failure. You should fear succeeding at something that is not important.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 03:30:19 UTC

Such jobs often make people define the word success. Is it being a loved employee or being loved/loving someone.

That is very true. Many corporations pay lip service to wanting their employees to have a good work/life balance, but then they turn around and want you to work lots of extra hours if you want to get ahead. In IT that may also mean giving up your holidays to work because your customer only has downtime on those days. I was never idealistic about corporate life, but my experiences have brought my cynicism to a whole new level.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 01:46:41 UTC

Do the reasons why the protagonist struggle matter to you, or is it the struggle itself that draws you in?

tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 01:56:14 UTC

I'm not sure. My Top Five Fav books: To Kill A Mockingbird, Man's Search for Meaning, The Book Thief, Pride and Prejudice, The Color Purple. All books have someone facing and overcoming a prejudice. In all the books the people maintained their integrity, themselves. I guess it is the struggle to remain good/positive in the face of adversity.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 03:33:20 UTC

I can see that. Maintaining personal integrity -and the conflict and struggle that arise from that- are powerful tales. The Crucible is another story that hits those themes hard.

tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 15:59:09 UTC

I'm still given thought to why I am drawn to this type of book. The only thing that feels right is that it has to do with me being a psychologist. I think I see so many people who grow up under horrible circumstances or seriously flawed modeling. I think I am for ever trying to figure out how to help my clients not let those events define them but view them as signs of their strength. They persevered. They want to do, be better.

Wow, I feel like I might owe you money for a session or something.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 20:25:31 UTC

That's a good way of putting it; taking your passion and wanting to see it become a success through prose can be very self affirming.

Wow, I feel like I might owe you money for a session or something.

Hey, I always take tips. ;-)

Discussions like this usually work better over beers -or at a coffeehouse- and I've not had one of these sort of discussions in years. At least, not with the kids absent. Considering the physical distance for all involved, I guess this'll have to substitute for that.

tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 20:36:01 UTC

I can play some coffeehouse jazz and sip a chai-tea latte as I type comment.

And as far as tips go, given the distance all I can offer is put it on my tab or a verbal tip: Don't eat yellow snow. ;)

mtlawson January 16 2010, 20:41:31 UTC

I can play some coffeehouse jazz and sip a chai-tea latte as I type comment.

Yeah, but it's not the same thing. There were evenings I remember fondly from college where about four or five of us would be holed up in a corner of one of the local bars -typically The Shed- and we'd discuss stuff like this. Other than meeting and dating my future wife, those were some of my favorite parts of college life. Maybe getting together at a con would be the answer. Some year.

Don't eat yellow snow. ;)

Thank you, Frank Zappa. ;-)

tracy_d74 January 16 2010, 20:45:23 UTC

Yes, one year the con. Hopefully one day I won't be so financially challenged. I hope. I hope.

Yes, I have memories of haning out with friends having such conversations. Our spot tended to be IHop. Not sure how that came about I think it was the need for pancakes and coffee at 2 am.

mtlawson January 16 2010, 23:13:51 UTC

IHOP is good, but they only recently came back into SW Ohio after being gone for many years. Our midnight place of decadence was a place east of Dayton in Yellow Springs, called Young's Jersey Dairy. They used to be grandfathered out of the pasteurization law, and at the time they were open 24x7. Ice cream at 2 AM. Yum.

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