"Fifteen More Daisies in My Hands"
My hair is....dark ash brown. How boring...and normal. So it's just...like black..really..brown, but it looks jet black. So no more blonde, copper and hazelnut highlights or dark brown base. Just..black in general. When I staighten it, it should look fine, I guess. But when I get my hands on the digicam, I'll take a pic for ya readers. Let's jsut say..it's darker than my natural color and matches my eyes.
In other news...
As I said, started an advice Xanga. Funny how many people are seeking of advice. I made it seprate from this one due to the fact one of the people in the blog ring mistaked me for a person in need of help. yeah..I'm stuborn and just reacted like, "Wait..I'm here to help". We all have our problems so I wanted to keep mine out of the eyes of others from that point. My problems are like a flow chart right now. Kinda going HIGH UP...then rolling BACK DOWN. A lotta of things have gotten me thinking.
Talked about a lot yesterday at the Special Olympics picnic I was at yesterday with Brian, Maria Jose, Stephanie H., and Billy and Jen somewhat. Ever realized New Jersey is the state with most students attending college. But we have the densest highschools ever? That's kinda..weird in its own way. It was nice to help out and just enojoy myself yesterday playing some tennis and ping pong, frisbee, taking pics w/ Brian, a Special Olympian named Brian and Billy. And um..conversating with people and making sure everyone was having fun.
Amy's hangout for her birthday was very different for me. We barely get to hang out 'cuz of our schedules and the fact she attends different classes and has different friends. So yesterday was like sitting around her house..watching over..kids. Her ex is about 1-3 years younger than her, then it was her cousins. And only like 2 other highschool students there...who were around a kid level. I mean, they're older than me..I'm a kid..but iI just felt pretty outcasted there. Yeah..I played with them outside, just felt weird. Then watched the controversy of Amy's lovelife knowing I couldn't help 'cuz she was closer with Alisha about it, so I sat back and talked to Ashley about life. Yeah..I left around erm..7:30 I think 'cuz her father had to drive her cousins, and Alisha home I beleive. No matter how much we change, we'll always be sisters at heart...as we used to believe when we were just younger, pint sized versions of ourselves.
Today..celebrated Alexis's (my 1st oldest brother) 24th birthday with cake. And look at that. The batteries for the digicam needed to be charged. I wonder why..-innocent whistle-. Teheh, just kidding, but yeah, I had to tell my mother I used it for a field trip; got in trouble. But she has to figure out by now, i really want my own digital camer. Speaking of technology, my computer is on the fritz meaning it might crash soon. So yeah..expect that.
"I gave my all in this world to recieve the bitterest of words and wishes, and to lose everything. I gave away all of me to try my chances...and no matter how much pain that can cause, I'll never regret it."
I'll explain that in a later entry..feeling a bit on the emo side right now which is pretty much why I'm not writing about how I'm feeling right now. I'm happy..but I'm..well..empty. I looked into the mirror and my eye color was black. I hate when that happens...just when the color just fades out. Like you can see into my eyes..and know every lie, memory, and regret I attempt to seal. And every person I've been disrespected and used by, and every scar on my body that tells a different story. No it's not cuts from a knife, I meant like, my car accidents and stuff snd other stuff.
So let's watch the petals of my daisies drop one by one....
Lie to me....
Lie to me, oh no please don't.....
Mistreat me....
Not treating a lady well....
Carry this picture for luck.
~Sweet dreams.