In Short...
I am pissed. I wrote in this journal yesterday, but due to a VERY strong storm that passed over my job, it was erased. I really put alot into it too, so you can imagine my disdain. Well, like Currica says, this will be the short and edited version of yesterday's thoughts due to the fact that I can't remember what the hell was said. So:
The party went off without a hitch.
I met up with lots of old friends (All the way back to elementarty) and met some new ones.
I looked fabulous, but clearly ran my mascara when I saw my father and my mother give each other a hug at the party. It was emotional~ believe me.
I danced, I laughed, I drank, I bent over backwards (literally), I worried, I sweated, I caught some of the Falcons pre-season game (go Birds!), and then I went clubbin...where I drank some more!!!
Did I mention that John Legend is still in my mind? Did I mention that Common is the most beautiful man ever made? Oh, okay...just checking :0)
I really appreciate the people in my life-I mean I REALLY do. I had to really come clean with some of the closest people to me this past weekend and basically admit these few things:
I am not perfect.
I am possessive and territorial.
I hold things inside.
I am furious, and would like to learn how to control it.
I ask people to change, but don't ever think to try it myself.
I don't know how to love.
I don't like to show emotion.
I am subconsciously afraid when men yell and am enraged at when I am not the center of attention.
However, I do love them all and that is why I felt the need to come clean and admit some things. I am having a hard time with this because I'm used to putting on the pretty face and tellin everyone that I'm fine, and they will be too. But, the honest truth is that it WON'T be fine-it may be GREAT, it may be HELL, but either way-you'll live and it will only make you stronger. But, I have to learn how to take my own advice sometimes and be a woman and stand up for myself. We'll see how things go. 2 more days until I move in!!! Once again, I'm gonna stop lying to myself-I DON'T WANNA GO :0(
And to boot, I just found out that my exboyfriend has a mental illness. And to be honest, I think I had something to do with it. God, what do you want me to do?!
Til the key rings,
CaNdAcE
The party went off without a hitch.
I met up with lots of old friends (All the way back to elementarty) and met some new ones.
I looked fabulous, but clearly ran my mascara when I saw my father and my mother give each other a hug at the party. It was emotional~ believe me.
I danced, I laughed, I drank, I bent over backwards (literally), I worried, I sweated, I caught some of the Falcons pre-season game (go Birds!), and then I went clubbin...where I drank some more!!!
Did I mention that John Legend is still in my mind? Did I mention that Common is the most beautiful man ever made? Oh, okay...just checking :0)
I really appreciate the people in my life-I mean I REALLY do. I had to really come clean with some of the closest people to me this past weekend and basically admit these few things:
I am not perfect.
I am possessive and territorial.
I hold things inside.
I am furious, and would like to learn how to control it.
I ask people to change, but don't ever think to try it myself.
I don't know how to love.
I don't like to show emotion.
I am subconsciously afraid when men yell and am enraged at when I am not the center of attention.
However, I do love them all and that is why I felt the need to come clean and admit some things. I am having a hard time with this because I'm used to putting on the pretty face and tellin everyone that I'm fine, and they will be too. But, the honest truth is that it WON'T be fine-it may be GREAT, it may be HELL, but either way-you'll live and it will only make you stronger. But, I have to learn how to take my own advice sometimes and be a woman and stand up for myself. We'll see how things go. 2 more days until I move in!!! Once again, I'm gonna stop lying to myself-I DON'T WANNA GO :0(
And to boot, I just found out that my exboyfriend has a mental illness. And to be honest, I think I had something to do with it. God, what do you want me to do?!
Til the key rings,
CaNdAcE