unsteady ramblings
I'm a bit unsteady at the moment, so I'm just going to think into the textbox until I have a journal entry and some slightly calmer nerves.
Or I'll just blank the box again, because cranky rambling is not my friend. Why not.
I got some stuff done with PHP and RSS, which I'll have to detail sometime when I can brain it. That took awhile, but I got it working and I'm quite proud of the results. Part of the code is some weird horror that doesn't make sense but does what I want; we'll see if it stays that way...
I have identified that I do not enjoy online systems that let other people see when I am logged in them. I get it, I just don't like it. It gets my anxiety thrumming "ahh ahh you are doing all the things wrong and everybody can tell ahh" and that is the exact opposite of fun. How badly it thrums depends on who might be looking and what they might think of me: strangers I can usually handle, but people who I want badly to think of well of me cause a sensation like a high-pitched electrical buzz that I can never shut off, because it's inside my mind.
(I really hope that sounds terrible, because boy is it. I'm not feeling my metaphors today; not sure if it's because I'm not making good metaphors or because I'm just generally not feeling much except "bleh".)
It does help to put feelings into words. Feelings are harsh masters of me. Words are friendly: I know them and we generally get along.
According to the rumbling of my belly, I should feel better once I have something to eat. That sounds good. I still have some time before supper, so I'll just have some carrots or something. Then I plan to pick one item off my "to do" list, get it done, and come back to the computer to check on roleplaying stuff. (There's a post I need to write, but I'm having trouble balancing roleplay versus household stuff that needs to get done. At least I'm never bored, right?)
I sound more like myself now. Yay! Okay, I'm going to go eat something and get some things done. (Generic plan is generic.)
EDIT: Or he can get home early and I'll get right on supper. That works too.
Or I'll just blank the box again, because cranky rambling is not my friend. Why not.
I got some stuff done with PHP and RSS, which I'll have to detail sometime when I can brain it. That took awhile, but I got it working and I'm quite proud of the results. Part of the code is some weird horror that doesn't make sense but does what I want; we'll see if it stays that way...
I have identified that I do not enjoy online systems that let other people see when I am logged in them. I get it, I just don't like it. It gets my anxiety thrumming "ahh ahh you are doing all the things wrong and everybody can tell ahh" and that is the exact opposite of fun. How badly it thrums depends on who might be looking and what they might think of me: strangers I can usually handle, but people who I want badly to think of well of me cause a sensation like a high-pitched electrical buzz that I can never shut off, because it's inside my mind.
(I really hope that sounds terrible, because boy is it. I'm not feeling my metaphors today; not sure if it's because I'm not making good metaphors or because I'm just generally not feeling much except "bleh".)
It does help to put feelings into words. Feelings are harsh masters of me. Words are friendly: I know them and we generally get along.
According to the rumbling of my belly, I should feel better once I have something to eat. That sounds good. I still have some time before supper, so I'll just have some carrots or something. Then I plan to pick one item off my "to do" list, get it done, and come back to the computer to check on roleplaying stuff. (There's a post I need to write, but I'm having trouble balancing roleplay versus household stuff that needs to get done. At least I'm never bored, right?)
I sound more like myself now. Yay! Okay, I'm going to go eat something and get some things done. (Generic plan is generic.)
EDIT: Or he can get home early and I'll get right on supper. That works too.