Open house
Tonight is open house and i plan on doing some hopping around.open house is where the people of the opposite sex get to visit in each other's room (depending on who's open house it is for). tonight is open house for the girls. i know i'll be over jr's for a little bit. and steve said i could stop by. and aaron wants me to visit. but then i was thinking about maybe going to chris' room. i know everything that happened between us is ridiculous but i really do miss him. and even though i know that it's not right for us to get back together at this time, i still miss hanging out with him and being around him. its so difficult seeing him here everyday. i think this summer was a lot easier cuz i didn't have to see him all the time. but now, we barely even talk to each other. this is NOT the way i had planned it. but then again, i can't plan everything. i just wish this was one thing that i had under control. amanda doesn't want me to go because she said that i already made an attempt to fix things and they went right back to being weird again. i on the other hand, think that i should give it another shot. i'm not good at giving up on people. i never was. i don't intent to give up on our friendship that easily. it meant a lot to me. he means a lot to me. and i guess what i need to find out is how much i mean to him. cuz if it's nothing, then i'm forced to move on with my life. but if he still cares for me, then why can't we be friends? what's wrong with that?
i usually take other people's advice. when i've never been through situations, and they have, i ask for advice and go from there. most of the time, i take it and don't even have to deal with the drama. but this is something i feel i need to learn on my own. it's probably going to hurt like heck and i'm gonna have to deal with the consequences, but i have to find out for myself. i can't just listen to the advice, (although i do ask for it, and also do appreciate it very much). i haven't disregarded what others have said, including my mom, but i need to know. it's not going to get any better until i do something.
i guess i'll find out when i get back from open house, what exactly it did.
i usually take other people's advice. when i've never been through situations, and they have, i ask for advice and go from there. most of the time, i take it and don't even have to deal with the drama. but this is something i feel i need to learn on my own. it's probably going to hurt like heck and i'm gonna have to deal with the consequences, but i have to find out for myself. i can't just listen to the advice, (although i do ask for it, and also do appreciate it very much). i haven't disregarded what others have said, including my mom, but i need to know. it's not going to get any better until i do something.
i guess i'll find out when i get back from open house, what exactly it did.