When the beating of your heart, echoes the beating of the drum...
Tonight I went to my first “political” related gathering. It was a meeting for the GLBT Democrats of Suffolk County. Rose was interested in going because the topic at hand was a proposed Domestic Partnership Registry. So, excitedly, I tagged along. I always have the feeling that I want to be more political minded, that I want to stand up for
( Read more... )
During the Senate Judiciary Committee hearings on our legislation in CT which started as a same-sex marriage bill, and during numerous meetings I've attended at both the state lobbying and national levels, vermont has been mentioned and held up many times as a road of stagnation that others do not want to mirror and strategize against. Yes, it was groundbreaking in our country to introduce civil unions (although one could argue that the tiered relational status did not accomplish its desired end point), in 6 years and much social change - vermont is still the state of civil unions, not marriage.
So while I have much respect and somewhat mixed feelings for vermont beginning the notion of civil unions in America, I haven't seen the progression that we would have hoped for. That's not a personal affront...it's just the truth.
Reply
Reply
you know, vermont was not the big initiator of same-sex rights...right? In case you don't, here are some highlights....feel free to add your own, I love hearing more about this type of history.
In 1993, for the first time and without any backing of a LGBT group, 3 same-sex couples sued Hawaii for marriage licenses...this resulted in the Hawaiian Legislature passing the Reciprical Beneficiaries Statute. The earliest of what has continued to evolve...that I know of in America.
Then, in 1999, California adopted the first state-wide domestic partner registry...and adopted a domestic partnership law. Check it out - it's pretty amazing.
I think it was in April of 2000 that VT officially began or won (can't remember) their Civil Unions.
So, as you can see...we're all riding on some coattails....
Reply
Yes, I'm aware of the status of gay rights in Hawaii. Thanks to a state Constitutional amendment put in place by its citizens, a Hawaiian marriage is between a man and a woman. And the Reciprocal Beneficiaries Statute falls short of equal rights.
As for California, yes, they're cool, but they, too, saw their voters legislatively define a marriage as a union between a man and a woman. And their lovely governor recently knocked equal rights in their state back ten years with one signature.
So what makes Vermont so cool? Let me amend my original statement to rid it of the inaccuracies you pointed out: we're the first state to survive the backlash for granting equal rights and not take a subsequent step or twelve backwards. And we did so despite being far more conservative than California or Hawaii. And we did so with a moderate governor (the incorrectly labeled liberal Howard Dean) and a Republican governor. And we did so because our citizens weren't ready for gay marriage yet but were ready for progress.
In other words, we compromised because we realized that anything less would have been wrong, and anything more would have pushed the envelope further than 54% of Vermonters would have let it go. So what if we haven't yet reached our goal? At least we haven't fallen backwards since we began our pursuit and at least we're still taking aim.
Reply
Correcting and dissing are different things - there is importance to a critical eye...but I'll get to that in a second. Vt is "cool" and fairly progressive for a northern country state, I suppose...but that's hardly the point.
My point was that VT, although granting civil unions (which was a building upon earlier struggles for gay equality), VT has not made much progress since that momentous occasion. Hopefully, they will in the future. Those sentiments seem to offend you, although I'm not sure why. They're the truth...and yes, sometimes the truth stings a bit.
"So what makes Vermont so cool? Let me amend my original statement to rid it of the inaccuracies you pointed out: we're the first state to survive the backlash for granting equal rights. and not take a subsequent step or twelve backwards."
Firstly, this is correct and incorrect...at the state level this is true, but still does not provide parity to marriage at the federal level - so it's hardly equal rights...but you know this. Um, yeah, you didn't take a step backward (whew)...but VT remained fairly stagnant.
Other states (like CT) don't want to get caught up in granting CUs and then 6 years later still have CUs. That's why we already have a pending case in the courts that would grant full marriage rights. CUs are a stepping stone, not the end game. I'm not saying one state is "better" than another...cause maybe you haven't noticed benchly...a victory for one state is a victory for gay people everywhere. Getting territorial about it misses the point.
We have all built on the wins and even losses of others. Where some win and fall short (Hawaii), we try to push forward. Where some make tremendous strides but fall short (CA legislature passing SSM but being vetoed) we find victories and change strategies. Where some try to build upon previous victories of domestic partnerships (CA) and break new ground with CUs and remain stagnant (VT)...we try to build upon it or find another way (MA).
So Benchly, I hope you realize - this isn't about "vermont pride"...it's about being able to see the flaws even in your own yard, pushing forward, and making it better for everyone.
If you can't look at things critically, you've lost perspective.
Reply
What offended me originally and continues to offend me now is your consistent claim that Vermont is stagnant on this issue and Connecticut is better and able to see the light at the end of the gay-rights tunnel because you have same-sex marriage bills and court cases in the state pipeline. My problem is that you ARE saying one state is better than another, despite your contrary claim.
Same-sex marriage bills have been proposed in Vermont's legislature in the past and are still being proposed today. What rights we do have are the result of a court case. So where's the difference? How has Connecticut made more progress than Vermont? We're doing exactly the same thing Connecticut is doing so until you get off the soapbox on which you claim not to be standing, I'll continue to defend my state.
And all the while, because I do see these flaws, I'll keep my fingers crossed for your state, and all the others.
Reply
If only you would have asked if I believed that one state is "better" than another, I would have replied "no." Do I see strengths and shortcomings in many/every state - "absolutely." I have no particular allegiance to any one state...I fight for rights wherever I live, and see it as equally valuable.
Instead of asking me to clarify or explain, you made incorrect assuptions and assertions. A wise person asks for clarification when uncertain. You seemed confused.
In the future, if you have difficulty understanding my intention or are unsure of what I mean, just ask. I'd be more than happy to clarify or explain further. We're all in this together.
Reply
"A wise person asks for clarification when uncertain."
essentially telling Benchly, "you are not wise."
i would argue that we're all saying many of the same things and believe most of the same things, we just communicate it differently. some people react strongly to different communication styles. feelings can be more muddled when the communication is happening via the internet where tone, inflection, and body language are all lost.
just my 2 cents!
Go Vermont! Go Connecticut! Go Queers! *smile*
Reply
Reply
Reply
1. "I'm not saying one state is "better" than another."
2. "Where some try to build upon previous victories of domestic partnerships (CA) and break new ground with CUs and remain stagnant (VT)...we try to build upon it or find another way (MA)."
My interpretation of your statement is that you are claiming that Vermont is not trying to build upon the Civil Union victory by pursuing same-sex marriage rights, and that Connecticut is trying. Add to that your statement that Civil Unions are "second class" and your claim that Vermont had "settled," and I just don't understand your contradictions, or, more to the point, how you can claim they don't exist.
You can't have it both ways. You can't preach to me that I'm short-sighted for seeing things as state vs. state, and then turn around and push up your state while pushing down mine.
Of course I recognize that we are all in this together. But as long as you pretend that Vermont is not doing as much as Connecticut is doing, I'll continue to pretend that this state vs. state bickering matters to the equal rights cause.
Reply
Reply
Stated simply, despite Beauty's claim, there's no difference between our states. Both states cared enough to fight for equal rights, and when given Civil Unions, both states cared enough to fight for more. And yet, while calling Vermont "second class," she's only praised Connecticut, saying that Connecticut has taken the better path, while Vermont remains stagnant.
Reply
Your interpretation of this is incorrect and not contradictory. The "we" is a general "we" referring to the gay community (you see, I don't live in MA and you know this). Again, you didn't ask so drew incorrect conclusions. All you had to do is ask and I would have been happy to clarify.
This statement is stating a progression of civil rights. Read it again, in context. As you can see, CT is not listed in the above statement anywhere and yet you say that somehow I am referencing it. Note how many states that I do reference. If somehow you personally feel that other parts of new england get more attention or credit - that may be more of a personal issue than one I have created. Please, just ask. The devisiveness of blind state allegiance is taking its toll on logical readings of statements.
As I have stated many times, I have no particular allegiance to any state - I'm not even from CT. Hopefully again, you are able to see the civil rights movement as a progression...with victories being everybody's victories, and setbacks being a disappointment to us all.
Reply
Leave a comment