Location, location, location
I'm not the only one who sees something wrong with this dress, am I? I'm thinking of attack_laurel's narrowly avoided boob wreaths. (Blue and white dress, people who aren't me.)
So, I have the Summer 2008 issue of InStyle Weddings, and while there's a lot of fug in it, there was something in the etiquette section that just made me grumpy. I'm just typing it out because I don't feel like paraphrasing.
Question: How should we deal with guests who don't give a gift?
Answer: It's best to be gracious since it could be an oversight, or the gift might have been lost. Don't be tempted to ask, "Did you send us a gift? We're concerned because we're sure you sent one but it seems to have gotten lost." Think about how embarrassing it could be if you inquired, only to be told that they hadn't sent one yet! Also, avoid the temptation to gossip about your concerns. Instead, send each "non-gifting" guest who attended your wedding a note thanking them for coming. Not mentioning a gift will alert them that you didn't receive one. Some people believe it's fine to wait up to a year to send a gift. That's a myth -- as it's far better to send a gift right away or within three months of the wedding -- but it could explain the situation.
Is it just me, or does this operate on the assumption that every guest should and will give a gift? Now, I know it's usual for a guest at a wedding to give a gift, but it should absolutely not be assumed that they will. The role of a wedding guest isn't a potential giver of gifts, but a loved one who is there to help you celebrate your marriage. That's it. They're guests; you're the host. It's especially not right to think of the expected gift as an "admission fee". I'm not saying that this answer does, but there are people who have that mindset.
There's also an ad in here that features a model in a Victorian corset worn backwards while feeding tulle through a pedaled Singer. AGH.
I think it's silly to get all tetchy when someone doesn't bring a hostess gift to a dinner party. I mean, a bottle of wine or dessert is a nice gesture, but I never invited someone to my house for dinner because I was angling for booze or chocolate. It was always because I enjoyed their company (and I hate to eat alone; handicap of growing up with a large family).
So, I have the Summer 2008 issue of InStyle Weddings, and while there's a lot of fug in it, there was something in the etiquette section that just made me grumpy. I'm just typing it out because I don't feel like paraphrasing.
Question: How should we deal with guests who don't give a gift?
Answer: It's best to be gracious since it could be an oversight, or the gift might have been lost. Don't be tempted to ask, "Did you send us a gift? We're concerned because we're sure you sent one but it seems to have gotten lost." Think about how embarrassing it could be if you inquired, only to be told that they hadn't sent one yet! Also, avoid the temptation to gossip about your concerns. Instead, send each "non-gifting" guest who attended your wedding a note thanking them for coming. Not mentioning a gift will alert them that you didn't receive one. Some people believe it's fine to wait up to a year to send a gift. That's a myth -- as it's far better to send a gift right away or within three months of the wedding -- but it could explain the situation.
Is it just me, or does this operate on the assumption that every guest should and will give a gift? Now, I know it's usual for a guest at a wedding to give a gift, but it should absolutely not be assumed that they will. The role of a wedding guest isn't a potential giver of gifts, but a loved one who is there to help you celebrate your marriage. That's it. They're guests; you're the host. It's especially not right to think of the expected gift as an "admission fee". I'm not saying that this answer does, but there are people who have that mindset.
There's also an ad in here that features a model in a Victorian corset worn backwards while feeding tulle through a pedaled Singer. AGH.
I think it's silly to get all tetchy when someone doesn't bring a hostess gift to a dinner party. I mean, a bottle of wine or dessert is a nice gesture, but I never invited someone to my house for dinner because I was angling for booze or chocolate. It was always because I enjoyed their company (and I hate to eat alone; handicap of growing up with a large family).