Horny kids
So, I received a message on Myspace from someone under the name of "Robbie"
The message said this:
"I'm a 14 year old teen looking for a girl that can teach me how to have sex, kiss, etc. I will do ANYTHING WHATSOEVER if you can help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
And this is how I replied:
You're 14 and should be playing football, not knocking up some girl and then being tied to someone who you didn't really fall in love with and you have to raise a child, pay welfare, not get a proper education...
Oh and you could also get STDs like AIDS and HIV, or Gonorrhea! Gonorrhea gives you these symptoms: thick, cloudy, foul-smelling penile discharge; painful, burning sensation upon urination; testicular or abdominal pain.
What's that? You want more! Okay, here's some more STDs!
Syphilis
development of a chancre (painless sore); swollen painful joints/aching bones; rash on hands and feet and mild hair loss
Chancroid
appearance of small boil or ulcer; open sores; painful urination
Ohoh! There's more! Some other common STDs include trichomoniasis, which is caused by protozoa and is treated by a simple oral antibiotic, and scabies and crabs, which are tiny organisms that infest the skin or pubic hair!
How can you prevent yourself from living a life of an adult at the age of 15 and/or having gross diseases that make your penis look like a shriveled up balloon?
DON'T HAVE SEX.
If you feel you do not wish to take my original advice try this.
a) masturbate a lot.
b) Get a blender. Plug it in. Take your penis, place it inside the blender in such a way that it meets the blades. Turn on the blender. See the wonder that unfolds!
<3
I love being an ass
The message said this:
"I'm a 14 year old teen looking for a girl that can teach me how to have sex, kiss, etc. I will do ANYTHING WHATSOEVER if you can help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
And this is how I replied:
You're 14 and should be playing football, not knocking up some girl and then being tied to someone who you didn't really fall in love with and you have to raise a child, pay welfare, not get a proper education...
Oh and you could also get STDs like AIDS and HIV, or Gonorrhea! Gonorrhea gives you these symptoms: thick, cloudy, foul-smelling penile discharge; painful, burning sensation upon urination; testicular or abdominal pain.
What's that? You want more! Okay, here's some more STDs!
Syphilis
development of a chancre (painless sore); swollen painful joints/aching bones; rash on hands and feet and mild hair loss
Chancroid
appearance of small boil or ulcer; open sores; painful urination
Ohoh! There's more! Some other common STDs include trichomoniasis, which is caused by protozoa and is treated by a simple oral antibiotic, and scabies and crabs, which are tiny organisms that infest the skin or pubic hair!
How can you prevent yourself from living a life of an adult at the age of 15 and/or having gross diseases that make your penis look like a shriveled up balloon?
DON'T HAVE SEX.
If you feel you do not wish to take my original advice try this.
a) masturbate a lot.
b) Get a blender. Plug it in. Take your penis, place it inside the blender in such a way that it meets the blades. Turn on the blender. See the wonder that unfolds!
<3
I love being an ass