So MaNy LonG GooDByeS
Time seems to be fading so fast now that we know the time you are to leave. I'm doing ok somedays - knowing you wont be around to hold, comfort, or kiss. I mostly cry at night - trying desperately to remember the way you look while you sleep. You look peaceful but still troubled and I feel so bad that I can't make it all go away. All I can do is look-on and keep promising i'll be right here when you return. Everytime I think about "over there" I feel my breath catch in my throat and have to shake my head hoping this whole thing isnt real, isnt happening to me. ...I'm scared. I'm terrified. How am I supposed to laugh at your stupid jokes you make about small things..when I cant hear your voice to tell me them?
You bought a laptop - and you're so excited about it. Great. I keep telling myself it'll be ok, this isnt going to last forever and you'll be back before we both know it. But when you come back...Tammie will be in school, Calvin will be walking and talking, and Me..well I'll still be in love. Right? I made a vow to you to be your wife - through it all to be your rock of support and the one you will always have to count on. This I believe is my true test to that vow. God help me. I hope I'm as strong as you say/think I am. I couldnt bear to let you down now.
You bought a laptop - and you're so excited about it. Great. I keep telling myself it'll be ok, this isnt going to last forever and you'll be back before we both know it. But when you come back...Tammie will be in school, Calvin will be walking and talking, and Me..well I'll still be in love. Right? I made a vow to you to be your wife - through it all to be your rock of support and the one you will always have to count on. This I believe is my true test to that vow. God help me. I hope I'm as strong as you say/think I am. I couldnt bear to let you down now.