Title: My Idol, My Love
Author: msdesireen with lotsa [I really mean A LOT] inputs from
ayakanishiPairings/Main Characters: Akanishi Jin, Kamenashi Kazuya, Renchi, Nisa, Brandon Blaire,Ezren Maze, Yamashita Tomohisa
Genre: Fluff, AU, MultiChapt, Romance
Ratings: PG
Chapters: 34/?
Disclaimer: I own some characters, but obviously the boys are not mine. Oh, and the plot is aya-chan’s. ^^
Warning: Kamenashi Kazuya is a girl in this fict. I warned you, so don’t brick me >.<
Summary: Kamenashi Kazuya is a typical fangirl of the Japanese Superstar Akanishi Jin. One day, she stumbled upon a certain AJ on an internet chat room, and they quickly became friends. What will happen when Kazuya finds out that AJ is actually Akanishi Jin in disguise? Will their relationship change after the truth is revealed?
::Conversation 1:: AJ=Akanishi Jin //
::Conversation 2:: Getting to know you //
::Conversation 3:: School //
::Convesation 4:: In love?//
::Conversation 5:: Ill//
::Conversation 6:: I Miss You//
::Conversation 7:: Prom Night //
::Conversation 8:: Exams //
::Conversation 9:: DAY1 - The Over-protective Father & Fangirl Mother//
::Conversation 10:: DAY2 - Kazuya's Secret Hideout//
::Conversation 11:: DAY3 - Vacation Job //
:: Conversation 12:: DAY 4 - Sports //
::Conversation 13:: DAY 5 - Getting around town //
::Conversation 14:: DAY 6 & 7 - Camping Trip //
::Conversation 15 :: DAY 8 - Akanishi Jin VS Brandon Blaire //
::Conversation 16:: DAY 9 - Jin's Confessions //
::Conversation 17:: DAY 10 - Departure //
::Conversation 18:: Abandoned //
::Conversation 19:: Walking Away //
::Conversation 20:: Making Up //
::Conversation 21:: All was well //
::Conversation 22:: Headlines //
::Conversation 23:: Man's Talk //
::Conversation 24:: Photo Shoot //
::conversation 25:: Fight? //
::Conversation 26:: New York //
::Conversation 27 More about Kazuya //
:: Conversation 28:: Valentine's //
:: Conversation 29:: Hospital //
::Conversation 30:: Explanation //
::Conversation 31:: Anniversary //
::Conversation 32:: Addicted //
::Conversation 33:: Out of Sight, Out of Mind ::Conversation 34:: A Turn of Events
I didn't know what happened.
It just did.
You might think that it is a poor excuse on my part.
But I swear I really didn't know what happened.
The only thing that I remembered was attending the private party my buddies invited me to.
It started off as a usual hang out session with the boys. Something we try to keep up with in the midst of all our individual responsibilities. We were having fun, maybe too much fun. We were drinking as usual, maybe a tad more than usual. And, there were girls around. There were always more than a few girls around. The group of us was on the dance floor. Dancing, moving to the beat. A little touching here and there. Some grinding. More drinking and the cycle repeats.
Kazuya was not around much lately. I was a little bit insecure, a little unconfident. And I had drank more than a little.
We all had. Really. And I can't help but wonder why all of us had been so wasted that night. It was something that had never happened before. Something that we can't afford to have had happened before.
I didn't know who was the one who flag down the cab. It could be me, the girl or one of the boys.
I wasn't sure as to who told the driver where to go. Was it Toma? Yuu? Ryo? Or was it simply me?
Don't ask me how long it took us to get to the nineteenth storey .
Don't ask me how long it took us to get the door to open.
Don't ask me what we did inside the apartment.
I really don't know.
But there is one thing I do know.
It was a big mistake.
~*~
I was alone in the our studio. Well, it was merely a room that we had set aside for in Ba-chan's apartment to store all our art supplies, and a place where we could make a mess, paint our canvases or work on our sculptures.
I was a little tense, a little frustrated as I was way behind time on the final year project. Communication. That was the theme of the project. I was working on a painting. A painting of a house. A painting of constructing one house with many little houses. It was a lot of work. I had to research extensively on the various architectural characteristics of different countries. What I was painting wasn't merely a house. I was painting the building blocks of a Civilization. Something that is not possible without Communication.
I was so absorbed in my work that I didn't realize she was home. I didn't realize it until she gave me a hug from behind, calling out my name in a soft and husky voice.
"Brandon"
It was a whisper. A whisper that felt like a caress. And I felt tipsy after inhaling that whiff of alcohol dissipating from her.
"Hmm?" I replied, halting the brush strokes and waiting for my friend to come around, march back to her room having recovered from her drunkard state.
Only she didn't do that.
She pressed herself closer to me, her hands roaming around my body, and planting soft kisses on my neck. I was more than surprised and made to stop her. Turning around abruptly to face her, and to stop her, only served to make the situation worst, crushing our lips together. She settled down comfortably on my lap,spreading her legs as she sat down on top of me to keep her balance without breaking the kiss. My tongue burnt upon contact with hers. She had drank too many of those vodka shots she so loved. It felt surreal. The way I was able to hold her so close, and kiss her to my hearts content. I was reluctant to break away if not for the obvious fact that we both needed to breathe.
I was craving for the oxygen to clear the haze of lust. It was late, I was too tired and I had let my guard down. The breath of much needed air enabled me to think clearly, to assess the situation objectively.
"Kazuya, you're drunk," I managed, albeit still breathless.
"I'm not," She replied determined, and leaned in to taste what I have in store for her yet again.
"Kazuya, I'm not Jin," I announced quietly, cupping her face, and looking straight into the hazel eyes that I had fell in love with years ago.
"I know you are not Jin, Brandon," She was unfazed and returned my intense gaze. I became the one who looked away.
"It's late, let's get you back to your room," I muttered, carrying her bridal style.
"Pleasure, it would definitely be more comfortable than to do it on your stool," came her smart retort. I stopped and gave her a look,clearly disturbed.
She merely shrugged, clinging on even more tightly to my neck, leaning up and whispering, "I know you want me."
I took to ignoring her. Something must have happened between Jin and herself, and that must be the reason why she is acting out of character.
"I am not treating you as a mere substitute," she purred before returning to licking, kissing and nibbling on any exposed skin.
I do not mind being a substitute if that is what keeps you happy. But she doesn't need to know these thoughts of mine. I continue to ignore her, keeping my breathing and heart rate in check while carrying her back to her bedroom. It was the most arduous trip back to her bedroom from the studio as yet.
She refused to budge when I was having problems turning the door knob. She also refused to let go of the hold on my neck after I had laid her on the bed. Instead, she pulled me forward unexpectedly, and I toppled forward.
The next thing I knew, she was sitting across my stomach, pinning both my arms in a firm grip. I could easily overpower her, but the curiosity of what could have happened next got the better of me. She leaned in and whispered "Make. Love. To. Me." as she littered my face with kisses. Something in me snapped and I became the one pinning her down in no time.
She shut her eyes tightly at the sudden turn of tides, seemingly afraid of what was to be expected next. I sighed and got off her, knowing she was not one bit ready for what she had proposed.
At that moment, she cried.
~*~
"Why?" I sobbed.
"Why?" He directed the question back at me, with a voice laced with concern and...was that a tinge of sorrow?
I felt so unloved.
So... unwanted.
I thought he loved me, but maybe I thought wrong.
I thought he loved me too, but then I could have thought wrong yet again.
I was at a loss.
My world came crashing down.
I didn't know what to believe in anymore.
~*~
A/N: Hisashiburi! It's been a long time. Hopefully I will not lose momentum while I try to get my muse back. I know this chapter didn't clear anything up as yet. But now we all know something happened. Stay tuned to the next chapter which will be out soon~
~*~
::Conversation 35:: The End? ~*~