Muffins for Mom - for really, really, pissed off Moms.
Muffins for Mom was going on this morning at the kid's school. Jamieson had stayed over at Gramma's and she would take him in, and I would be taken Sarah. Get up; get ready - no worries. We get to the school at 7:35am find a parking spot on the back row and go in. We meet up with Jamie and Gramma and have some breakfast of pancakes and fruit and of course, muffins. All is well.
Until I need to leave to head to work. I leave the building and head out to the parking lot and stop. "Oh no fucking way?!". A WHOLE ROW of cars decided since the parking lot was full, to line up behind all of us on the back row, blocking in about 15 cars. Including mine. Not only is this ridiculous but it also makes for a very tight squeeze for those people trying to drive through the lot just for dropping off their kids.
I go to the office, I let them know the situation; they are all "um, what should we do?!" How about make an announcement that if you have double parked your vehicle you need to move it because 1. it's parked illegally and 2. it has blocked in around 15 others that need to leave; eventually - or like myself NOW, for work. "Oh, yeah we can do that".
Meantime a couple people have left, including a space behind my car but not a large enough space as one other cars rear-end is still blocking me. I could have *tried* to wiggle out but in my already pissed off state of "what the fuck is wrong with people" - I couldn't be sure I'd not accidentally on purpose break off their rear light and rip off their bumper. So I waited. And in that time; three or four other cars tried to park in the open spot.
Person 1. - "I can't park here?"
Me - "No, these people are double parked, blocking others, they aren't parking spots"
Person 1. - "you expect me to drive around?"
Me - "No, you can park across the road on the street, it's legal"
Person 1. - "it's hot outside, you expect me to walk across the road?"
Me - rolling my eyes at them - "Yes, because they've already announced inside for these other people to move their cars out of the way as well".
Person 1. - "I didn't hear it"
Me - staring at them like they have bugs crawling out of their noses - "are you INSIDE right now in order to be able to hear the announcement".
Person 1. - "oh I guess that makes sense" [ they drive on ]
Person 2. - "I can't park here, can I?"
Me - "No, these people are being asked to move their cars as well"
Person 2. - "how come you're parked here?"
Me - "I'm parked THERE [pointing to my blocked in car], waiting for these people to move"
Person 2. - "oh, sucks to be you"
Person 3. starts pulling in to that empty spot, I stand in front of them
Me - "you can't park here, people are trying to get out"
Person 3. - "what about all these other cars?"
Me - "these other people, are obviously idiots that care nothing about others needs but their own and therefore thought nothing of blocking in a whole row of cars, I'd say".
Person 3. - "are you calling me an idiot?"
Me - "are you intending to still park here?" [ they huff, then drive on ]
So I'm waiting and waiting and finally half an hour later the owner of the car in front of the one directly blocking me comes out. Unlocks her car, notices I'm glaring at her with hatred blazing as strong as bright as a supernova - looks at me and without even apologizing, says - rather snottily actually - "just get in your car, my sister is coming [nodding at the car behind her, that is the one blocking me], we'll be out of your way in a moment".
Um. Just get in my car? Seriously? So here's the dialogue that ensued. She will be labeled SB for Stupid Bitch. Her sister will be SBS for Stupid Bitch's Sister, and me, I'm just ME.
ME - "Look, I have a job to get to, you should have thought about blocking people in and inconveniencing everyone but yourself - which I'm sure you don't quite understand, considering you're driving an over priced Caddie with a license plate that reads IKNWUCIT [I know you see it]. See what exactly; that you're an Entitlement Bitch?"
SB - "Everyone is double parked, what can you do about it?"
ME - "I can have Officer Jamieson [my kids adoptive Uncle] come out here and with his over 14 years as a CharMeck traffic police, explain to you that just because everyone else is doing it still doesn't make it LEGAL"
SB - "I think you need to just relax, we'll be out of your way, we have jobs too"
ME - "I'm glad to know that even with your obvious limited mental capability you can hold a job, but the fact remains that MY job that I need to get to starts before yours, as I'm going to be late due to your superiority complex and your idiocy and disregard of others that is pushed aside for the needs of your own."
By now the sister comes up
SBS - "She giving you crap because we parked here?" [talking to SB of course] "Everyone else was doing it"
ME - "Okay seriously are we TWO fucking years old and if Little Susie jumps off the Empire State Building it's okay because she did it too?! Holy hell you bitches are ignorant."
SB - "Yeah she thinks cuz she knows the law she is the law, wait, did you just call me a bitch?"
ME - [ignoring her question] "Well how about this; how about I take pictures of your cars, and post them to You Park Like An Asshole. They don't bother to cover license plates there, so I'll make sure to get it in the shot nice and clear."
SB - "What? You said you would hit her car backing out"?
ME - looking puzzled - "Can you not hear, as well as not park? - I said I'd TAKE PICTURES of your car, not HIT YOUR SISTER'S car"
SB - "You can't take pictures without permission, that's illegal"
ME - "Um, no, not *really* - however double parking IS definitely illegal so go ahead and call someone while I get my camera out - make sure you let them know you're calling because you're a stupid cunt that blocked someone in by illegally double parking and now they're upset because you made them half hour late and are continuing to be a cunt-rag by arguing schematics instead of, I don't know, just MOVING YOUR FUCKING CAR".
SBS - "You better not hit my car!"
ME - "I never said I would, why would I damage my own car by hitting your piece of shit?" [the sister did not have a Cadillac, she had some Ford something or other] "and even if I did, then what, you gonna take your earrings off and throw your purse down on the ground in a fit of rage and act of defiance? Cuz really, I'll bring it and you will not win"
By this time the principal comes over and looks at the situation, looks at me and smiles and say "You're Jamie's mom! I say "And Sarah, I have TWO kids that come here actually". She looks at the sisters of doom who are scowling and says "next time, don't park like this, it's illegal and we can have you towed, I'll make sure to add that to the announcements that going forward if the parking lot is full you either need to go to run-off by the buses, or park on the street across the road". They both shot me looks of "oh for fucks sake" and got in their cars and left.
Principal turns to me and asks "what can I do to make this better". I said, well at the risk of sounding rude, and irate, and I apologize for that - please allow me to leave as I'm already late for work due to their ignorance and superiority complexes. She said she knew the one, but not the other and will be addressing them and the situation so this doesn't happen in the future. She smiled and said, "look at the bright side, perhaps in their delaying you - it saved you from an auto accident or something. Think of the positive!"
I said "okay - I positively hope their delaying ME makes them RUSH to their "jobs" [and yes I did the finger quotes in the air] and they cause their own accidents. Bad Karma - sure, but I'm due some to even out so I can wish ill on someone. Besides, they'd probably deserve it." She laughed at that. Said "no doubt". Apologized for keeping me any further. And I left.
Seriously people.
I don't care who you are, what you drive, what you make a year, who you know, what you do, and how you interact with other people in your lives personally. But if you can not adhere to basic common courtesy and give respect where you obviously feel you have "earned" respect. You can not expect me to be civil to you. Ever. I act out. I will act out. I will not just sit back and allow you your Grand Delusion of Entitlement.
Seriously.
*Edit: Post made public by request - feel free to share link.