A Comforting Presence (Steve/Tony) Part 4b
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A Comforting Presence
IV. Fury (cont)
“You owe me, stars,” Tony jokes quietly.
“Oh really?”
“Yeah. You got blood all over my suit. It’ll take ages to wash off.”
He closes his eyes, unable to fight the quirk of his lips. “I’ll try to bleed less next time.”
“Right,” there’s a sour note to Tony’s voice. “Next time.”
The tension in the room shifts then and Steve takes the moment to study the billionaire’s appearance with more care.
Tony’s clothes are a mess. He’s wearing the same trousers from before, the bottom left legging stained still from drops of alcohol. His beard, Steve can see now, is unusually unkempt, longer than usual with little grooming. There are bags under his eyes and more lines on his face than Steve remembers. Guiltily, Steve recalls the circumstances that led to this.
“I’m sorry,” He tells him, “about before. I should have told you about Agent Coulson and I am just... so... sorry, Tony. It’s my fault.”
Like he is shrugging off the veils of sleep, Tony jumps up in his chair, staring at Steve as if he’s insane. “What the hell are you talking about, Stars?”
Steve opens his mouth to reply but Tony cuts him off.
“You’re sorry? God, what are you apologizing for? I’m the one who should be...,” Tony runs a bony hand through his hair, “Fuck, do you have any idea what I-” He stops again, cursing and pacing the room. “I just, you were... I thought... Hell, Stars, just,” he take a deep breath and looks at him warily with an attempt at a smile, “consider that behind us. I shouldn’t have... you know it’s... I...”
He grimaces, clenching his fists and glaring at the floor.
“...Tony...,” says Steve.
“No, Stars, stop,” the man snaps before he swears at himself again and takes another deep breath. “Look... it’s just... Hulk wasn’t letting anyone near you. They had to come get me and well... you weren’t moving, Cap. And the last thing that I said... well...”
“Tony,” Steve is getting up now, the tubes attached to his arms moves with him, jerk with his veins.
“No, Cap, don’t get up-”
“It wasn’t your fault, I should have-”
“Yes it was!”
They stare at each other. Steve wants to reach out, to fix this somehow because he’s not sure when or how it became so wrong. But his brain isn’t summoning any words. It’s all blank and when he opens his mouth, he’s sure that more stupid things will come out.
But Tony turns away, “Never mind. I just, I’ll let you rest for now, Captain.”
“Wait, please, you should know that I don’t blame you at all. I trust you; I really do, Tony, with my life-”
“Well you shouldn’t,” he snaps, his face twisting before it shifts into something wearier, more tired and intense. “Just get some sleep, Stars.”
He moves towards the door and Steve tries to get up-“Tony please”-even attempts to pull out the IV lines in his skin to go after him and just explain things because he doesn’t think he can bear leaving things unspoken again (just one week, cap.) The machines are being knocked together. One almost falls over onto the bed, over his lap but Steve stops it with one hand.
“Whoa there, soldier!” Tony rushes over and pushes him back against his pillows. He scowls at him, “What the hell do you think you’re doing, Rogers? You’re not even fully healed yet.”
“Don’t go,” Steve says quickly. “We need to talk.”
“Oh god, not this line,” Tony groans automatically and normally this would bother Steve, the way Tony seems to dismiss everything as a joke. But it’s become endearing to him and it’s a sign that Tony is acting as himself again, even if it is a defense mechanism.
“I’m sorry,” Steve looks him in the eye, tries to get him to see. “I’m so sorry about hiding the truth about Coulson from you. I know that it was Clint’s choice and it is his right, his say. But I’m sorry. I knew it would hurt you but I didn’t want to disrespect Clint’s decision. It was wrong of me and I hope you know that.”
Tony opens his mouth, stops, and collapses back in his chair, covering his eyes with his hand. For a minute, Steve is terrified that Tony might explode at him, but the man’s body begins to shake and he is laughing.
“Um...”
“Do me a favour, stars,” Tony turns to him. “Let’s just forget about all that. What I said, everything, it never happened. So we’re cool. It’s cool. Everything is as cool as a cucumber.”
He doesn’t understand that reference. And it doesn’t feel like everything is settled. Steve still senses tension from Tony, an undercurrent of frustration and negative emotions bubbling under the surface of tired eyes. Steve wants to pursue the topic, figure out how Tony is feeling but-
Tony shakes his head. “I said some stupid shit to you, stars. Things I didn’t mean. I hope, I really hope, that you’ll forget about it. I’ve already put the Coulson thing away. I barely know what happened. Coulson? Who’s Coulson? Wasn’t he always alive, unconscious and strapped to a bed?”
His chest feels like its being squeezed painfully. “Tony-”
“Seriously, Cap. Forget it. You’re alive. Frankly, I’m just damn grateful to be speaking to you at all. I thought that I’d never hear you nagging at me again. What’s the world going to do without Captain America, after all? Can’t get a replacement Captain America.”
“...Right,” Steve thinks that his stomach is plummeting, that all the colours that Tony has brought into the bland room have dimmed against the white. “Captain America...”
Tony gives a nervous smile, “So, we’re cool?”
Steve swallows slowly, unable to get rid of the sick feeling inside. He smiles back, “Yes, we are.”
-
“How is Bruce?” Steve inquires when they’ve settled into another awkward silence. Tony has been fidgeting for the past five minutes, looking up at the ceiling, fiddling with the bottom of his shirt, clicking away at a mechanical pen. Steve, well, Steve is used to standing absolutely still. “Is he alright?”
Tony rolls his eyes. “Still hulking out, trapped in the glass cage until he turns back. He’s only calm and doesn’t try to break out if I’m in the cage with him. He’s got the whole facility scared shitless. Except maybe Fury, but that’s Fury, man was born without emotions.”
“What?!” Steve bolts up, the IVs moving with him.
“Whoa there, sit back down for fuck’s sake-”
“Why? Why is he-? Are they-?”
“I’ll tell you when you lie back down on the bed!” Tony shouts.
Steve quickly acquiesces and looks at Tony expectantly. With a long sigh and a look that threatens huge consequences if Steve jeopardizes the serum’s healing process, Tony tells him.
“He’s worried about you. The Hulk, Bruce. They wouldn’t tell us how you were. They’ve kept us here all week, claiming that it’s for national security, the usual stuff. I’m only allowed to see you now because I pulled some strings, made a couple of deals. Might have threatened to let the Hulk loose on all of them as well. But other than that, I’ve been holed up in here, hanging with the Hulk, terrorizing agents...”
Steve glances at him in horror, “They can’t just keep you here against your will. Hulk isn’t going to hurt anyone, as long as they don’t threaten him first-”
“-or his friends, because, you know-”
“Have they even let the Hulk see me?” From Tony’s deadpan expression, Steve can see that they haven’t. “I don’t understand why they’re keeping both of you here. And they haven’t even given you a spare change of clothes?”
“Oh that,” Tony grins dangerously. “No, it’s because I refuse to accept their shitty hospitality. There’s not even cable in that glass cell. Besides, I think the rugged look suits me.”
It certainly did in a strange way (he wanted to sketch the outline of Tony’s face, traced with the brushes of his deep brown beard and mustache), but that wasn’t the point.
“Why are they keeping you here? And don’t they usually tranquilize the Hulk to bring him out of it?”
Tony’s face wrinkles into a similar disgust that Steve feels. “Well, yes, they do tranq him. He just sees SHIELD agents telling him that Captain America is now classified property and goes all Hulk again. As for why they’re keeping us here, I assume it’s because they want us to sign forms searing secrecy.”
Steve’s brow furrows. “Secrecy.”
“Yeah,” Tony’s tone darkens, “They don’t want anyone to know about the Chitauri.”
Immediately the heart monitor races. Steve lets his eyelids fall shut. “How much do you know, Tony?”
“...about the freaky zombie alien that blew up my tower? Not much,” Tony frowns. “It was using my tech... that’s what I remember. Some old bombs that the company used to manufacture.” He glares at the wall. “My own fucking tech.”
He is so still (and far away) in that moment that Steve doesn’t know what to say. But it lasts but half a moment and Tony is smiling again, “Why do you ask?”
Steve frowns, wondering how to ask about Tony, as he glances up at the corners in the ceiling. There are likely cameras recording everything, the whole conversation.
Tony follows his gaze and smirks. “Relax, stars,” He says, “I had Jarvis hack into the system. No one is listening. They’ll hear some pre-recorded shit. Stuff we talked about when we went to lunch, Bach, ACDC...”
His muscles loosen and Steve beams. “Tony, you’re amazing. Thank you,” he misses the surprised look on Tony’s face before he tells him more seriously, “Fury knew about the Chitauri before all this happened.”
Tony freezes, then the man who told him that they are not soldiers returns. “Tell me everything.”
Steve does, from his meetings with Nick Fury to the detailed break-in to find Coulson. Tony needs to know.
-
When he is done, Steve feels like he is floating in the air, a balloon that has been let loose from its ties to the ground. It feels good to have everything out in the open with Tony, reminds him of mission briefings and plans with Colonel Philips, Peggy and Howard. There’s a sense that he’s doing, well, something.
Tony looks furious and for a moment, it is like before, when Tony is helping him find a place to live, a place separate from Steve... and it felt like they might be friends.
The billionaire sits back, stone-faced. “He could have prevented all of this.”
Steve doesn’t argue. With some definite and clear warnings, Tony would have had a better idea of who was stealing his tech. All of them could have been more wary of possible attack.
“He said that it was classified information. What does he have to gain from that?” Steve speculates.
“Or what does he have to hide?” Tony seems to echo. “Seems like his proverbial skeleton in the closet is bigger than we think.”
“I don’t like it,” Steve admits, “that we’re being used this way.”
Tony shrugs bitterly, “Welcome to the real world, stars, where everyone you know will stab you in the back.”
The words tear at Steve and he grips the sheets tightly.
“Well then, we won’t let them.”
Tony stares at him incredulously as if he can’t believe that Steve would say such a thing and he continues, “This isn’t right. What else would you expect me to do?” He doesn’t let Tony answer, doesn’t want to know what Tony thinks Steve would decide instead, “Now, Tony, I know you hacked into SHIELD’s headquarters before with Bruce. Think you can do it again with no one finding out?”
Slowly Tony begins to grin again, his eyes gleaming, “Oh, Stars, you’re talking to a genius here. I’ll take care of it.”
“I never had a single doubt,” Steve replies softly.
-
“Where’s Stark?” Fury asks when he marches through the doors. “Thought he’d still be here grovelling or talking your ears off.”
Steve looks away. He’s doodling the beginnings of Tony’s beard beside a shaded sketch of the Hulk. “He left. Had to check on Bruce. Weren’t you going to debrief me on the Chitauri?”
Fury scowls, “And they say you have no cheek.”
“Don’t know what you’ve been reading about me, sir, but I’ve always had a running mouth,” Steve remarks nonchalantly.
Fury throws a thick folder onto the sheets. Agent Hill comes in, rolling what Steve recognizes as a projector, the same kind that they used to try and introduce him to twenty first century technology. She leaves, giving a curt salute to Fury and a wary nod towards Steve.
“There are some things that you should know now,” he says and then he plugs in the projector.
-
“We told you that we burned the Chitauri’s bodies... but that wasn’t entirely true.”
The images from the projector change from the SHIELD logo to images taken of labs, labs that Steve recognizes from the hospital that he broke into with Clint and Natasha (He wonders if they’ve been keeping themselves safe while he’s been gone.) There is the same giant screen, same white walls and glass columns and tubes, attached to a machine.
Except these massive glass tubes are not glowing blue as they were when he last saw them. They are filled with ice.
And Steve can see the bodies of eight Chitauri sitting in each tube. And around them, there are stretchers, stretches holding more alien corpses.
Steve feels sick.
“We kept some of the bodies,” The image changes to a close-up of an alien dissection. It must be the heart and the lungs, just as red as a human’s would be, “and experimented on them.”
He can’t stop looking at the crimson pooling up in the alien bodies.
“Why?” He asks. “Just... why?”
Fury’s gaze is neutral. “You know why, Captain. We need the advantage. We have to stay ten steps ahead of the enemy and for that to work, we need information-on their anatomy, their weaknesses and strengths, where they come from, how to defeat them again if the time comes.”
“But they were all killed...! Unless they weren’t...”
The silence confirms it.
“We thought that the Chitauri operated on a hive mentality, with the mothership as the head controlling all the workers. If it was destroyed, then they all died.”
“But that wasn’t the case.”
“No.”
“...They were sleeping,” Steve realizes.
Fury nods. “Yes. The ones that weren’t cremated were in some kind of stasis or hibernation. We think that they were aware the entire time, through all the dissections and experiments... But they didn’t wake. Didn’t have enough energy to. Something about their mothership shutting down cut off their primary energy source.”
The slide changes to another image, one that Steve is shockingly familiar with, the same bright blue.
“The tesserect...”
“Not exactly,” says Fury. “Pieces of the original tesserect. We believe the cube to be one of these pieces.” And they are. They are little jagged pieces that appear to have been chipped off of the cube that Steve remembers Schmidt holding. They glow brightly in another glass tube, kept separate from the others. These things are minuscule compared to the tesserect, like grits of salt that have been placed carefully on a glass slide.
Steve has a foreboding premonition as Fury continues.
“It was only when we experimented with this energy source... that they awakened.” The photos that flash next are blurry and unclear, but Steve can make out the outline of a Chitauri soldier’s face as it slashes the camera apart. “They took some of our people and our technology, as well as the pieces of the tesserect.”
“What?” Natasha had said that the cube was capable of destroying the planet. These small things, could they-?
“Those pieces aren’t powerful enough to destroy us all,” Fury says, “but they are capable of destroying an entire block, if they wanted to, maybe even an entire city. The question is... why haven’t they done that yet?”
“Revenge,” Steve whispers, recalling the alien that had blown up Stark Tower. “They’re after us personally, all the avengers, and SHIELD, because we massacred their entire race in one blow.”
Fury doesn’t answer.
“You said that they took other people. Who did they take?”
“That’s classified-”
“Who did they take?” Steve demands again. “I need to know. I need to know everything. I can’t rush into this without all the pieces. I can’t protect anyone that way.”
“Captain, listen to me, you’re not going to be protecting anyone anymore,” The director informs him. “The Avengers initiative is being shut down. We’re taking you all back and dealing with each of you in the manner that will most benefit the safety of the world. You’re SHIELD property again, Captain. We can’t let you go out there.”
It’s cold again. It’s suddenly so cold that Steve can’t stand it.
“No,” he whispers. “You can’t. Tony isn’t part of SHIELD! And Tony, he’s, well he’s Tony Stark, you can’t just...”
“Naturally Iron Man will still be seen in public. SHIELD doesn’t have jurisdiction over him”-thank god, Steve thinks-“yet. But the Hulk is a threat, considered unstable when provoked. Since we have no means to terminate him, he’ll be kept under surveillance.”
“You can’t do that,” they can’t, Steve won’t let them, “What about Natasha, Clint, they left, they’re not-”
“A danger to national security. Considered renegades. We’ll have to terminate them.”
“Don’t you dare,” and Steve is out of bed, standing on unsteady feet. The sketchbook and blanket have fallen on the floor. “You said that the world needed the Avengers once. Well, it still does, so why are you disbanding us?”
“Because there isn’t a team left, Captain Rogers,” Fury shouts. “You’ve went your separate ways. The Black Widow and Hawkeye have abandoned SHIELD. Stark could care less about the initiative unless the world was fucking ending. Banner wants nothing to do with us... and you; you’ve become a wild card, Rogers.”
He thinks that this is how the ice felt, numb and unfeeling. It’s how his dreams feel these days, suffocating. The more he breathes in, the more he chokes.
“Please... don’t do this. You can have my blood whenever you need it, for your research, your experiments, just not my team.”
The director is unfazed. “We would have it anyways. You’re ours now.”
“No,” Steve says fiercely. “You wouldn’t. I will fight you. I won’t cooperate. Your drugs will have no effect on me unless you use them at colossal doses and I doubt that you can spare the resources to keep me drugged all the time. I’ll even end my own life if I have to and you won’t have the perfect specimen to study for the serum anymore.”
Fury is still. “Are you abandoning the world, Cap? Just like that?”
“No, I’m abandoning SHIELD too if you don’t leave my teammates alone. The world needs Captain America on their side. If I was to disappear, what would you tell them? That you threatened me? Regardless, I’ll do my best to protect it, but just not on your side.”
Fury lets out a sharp grunt. “And do you think that they’ll fight alongside you? The other avengers? They don’t want to be heroes... not like you.”
“It’s not about being the hero. It’s about doing what’s right and someone has to do it. I’m not asking them to stand beside me,” and he doesn’t, not when the world has betrayed them. They have their reasons. They have no obligations to follow him any longer now that they’re not part of SHIELD. “I can stand on my own.”
“They’ll call you a vigilante. You’ll be arrested.”
“Then so be it.”
For a minute, he thinks Fury might try to restrain Steve, to stop him from leaving. But then Fury is laughing, actually laughing as if Steve cannot believe his eyes (was there something funny in what he said?)
“...I... is this another test?”
Fury just shakes his head, “You’re the real deal, aren’t you, Captain? Fine, I won’t report Agent Barton and Romanoff’s actions to the council yet, so long as you continue doing missions from SHIELD, Rogers, and cooperate... with everything that we ask of you. But if they step out of line...”
“They won’t,” Steve says quickly.
Fury claps his shoulder, the most chilling look present in his eyes. “See to it that they don’t.”
-
“Um, sir?” Steve asks as Fury is preparing to leave the room.
“What is it, Rogers?”
“That news... about disbanding the Avengers Initiative... that wasn’t just a test, was it?”
The director sighs, and for the first time, Steve sees how tired he really is. “Unfortunately, Rogers. No. It wasn’t.”
He can only see the back of Fury’s coat. “You didn’t issue out this order... did you?”
Fury pauses but he doesn’t get to answer because then Agent Hill bursts through the doors.
Her expression is blank save for her panicked eyes. “Sir, it’s the Hulk... he got out.”
“Fuck, what is this? The official day of murder and mayhem? Lead the way, Agent Hill,” Fury follows her, he glares at Steve, who is trying to gather up his machines to go after them. “Stay put, Captain.”
“No,” Steve stumbles towards the door. “This is my team. I’m not going to let anyone hurt him. I told you that I’d handle it and I will.”
Fury gives an exasperated sigh, “Well then, fucking hurry up.”
-
“What the hell is going on here? Stark, what are you doing?!”
Tony is sitting on Hulk’s right shoulder, leaning back casually and observing the broken glass around the Hulk’s prison. He has the Iron Man suit on, but no mask, so Steve can see how casually Tony is observing the scene. Agents dressed in suits of blue or black surround them both, pointing their tranquilizers towards the Hulk but hesitant to shoot lest they hit Tony.
“Might have told my buddy here that you were holding Cap against his will,” Tony shrugs. “He might have thrown a baby whale-sized tantrum. Hard to tell.”
The Hulk grins dangerously at them, breathing through his teeth. Steve, held up in the back by the small crowd of agents, thinks that he sees some men shiver in their boots.
“Get down from there, Stark!” Fury shouts.
“How about ‘no’? I like looking down on all of you for once. This must be why Barton nests in high places all the time.”
“Not the point, Stark, get down!” Hill snaps at him.
But the Hulk roars at them all, baring his teeth. His voice makes the floor beneath them vibrate. Several of the agents step back involuntarily.
“The big guy does not approve,” Tony whistles.
Fury’s eye twitches, “Stark-”
“I don’t know about you,” Tony interrupts, “but I’d rather listen to the big green rage monster instead of you right now.”
Steve limps forward, pushing his way through the bodies of stiff men and women. The IV is wheeled behind him, tripping over polishes shoes as Steve makes his way to Hill and Fury.
“Where Cap!?” Hulk all but howls his demand. He raises his arms up, while Tony shifts over on the Hulk’s shoulders to get a better view of his audience. “Bring Cap or Hulk smash!”
Hulk lunges forward and every agent points his or her weapons towards him, fingers ready on the trigger. They are just about to shoot, for fear that the Hulk is really going to lash out at them physically, when Steve shouts, “Wait!”
He moves in front of the Hulk, just in time. Hulk stops and his demeanour changes when he sees Steve. A wide smile spreads across his face, similar to the one that Steve remembers when he let the Hulk smash freely during the Chitauri invasion.
“Cap!” Hulk leans down and moves to grab Steve with his right hand.
Hill moves her pistol up again and Hulk snarls at her.
“Oh, right, like waving your gun around at him will work again,” Tony drawls.
“Tell them to stand down, director,” Steve says calmly. “The Hulk isn’t going to hurt anyone.”
Fury frowns impassively. “You can’t be sure about that, Cap.”
“I know what I’m talking about.”
Steve dares Fury silently to go against his word. He still doesn’t know what Fury is playing at, whether he is on their side completely or not. He’s beginning to think that not everything is as it seems and he has more questions about why SHIELD wants to dismantle the avengers, about the Chitauri. But they can wait.
He wants to know what Fury will decide.
With one hand raised, Fury motions for his people to lower their weapons. Steve sighs gratefully and then Hulk’s fingers warp around him with surprising gentleness. The green giant lifts him and the IV contraption to his other shoulder.
“Thanks Hulk,” Steve smiles. He holds on to the metal pole of the IV contraption with his left hand. The right one still feels weaker than usual. It may be a day or two before he feels completely healed, at least physically.
“Alright, Hulk, now put Stark and Captain Rogers back down,” Fury orders without pause. It makes Steve wonder if Fury even knows how to be afraid (but that’s not true, he remembers seeing a slight flicker of fear, when Fury yelled the reasons for the Avengers being disbanded...)
Hulk growls, backing up a step and raising his hands protectively over Steve and Tony. “No. Hulk take Cap and Shiny Iron home!”
“He’s being hostile again, sir. Permission to defend?” Hill asks quickly, though her fingers twitch over her gun hoister.
“For fuck’s sake, it’s not that hard not to piss off the big guy. Just do what he says. Not that hard!” Tony throws up his hands, “And for the record, I do not like being called after a house hold item. I’m Iron Man, not a flatiron.”
“We can’t let you leave yet-”
Tony raises his right hand, a white circle glowing in the center of the armour’s palm. “I beg to differ.”
“I think,” Steve raises his voice over the rush of weapons clicking back in place, “that for the sake o everyone present, you should let the Hulk escort us back home.”
Fury raises his brow, “I don’t think so, cap. We have documents to sort through. There’s still the matter of your contract with SHIELD and your injuries-”
“We can take care of him,” Tony, surprisingly, snarls. “We’re getting out of here today and that’s that. You really don’t want the big guy or me to smash up the base.”
Hulk makes a punching motion with his hands, as if in agreement.
“We can discuss these things later,” Steve promises, “and I told you that I’d take responsibility for everything.” From his peripheral vision, he sees Tony staring at him suspiciously, “I keep my word.”
The director studies them for a few moments too long.
“Hulk isn’t going to be calm unless he’s with people he knows and trusts,” Tony snaps impatiently.
Fury scowls, “We’ll find you tomorrow Captain. This isn’t over.”
“No,” Tony says so that Steve doesn’t have to, “but this conversation is. Now, Hulk!” Tony turns his blaster to the wall behind him and shoots a hole through it, large enough for the Hulk to run through.
Steve should be horrified, really, he should. There are so many consequences to this wild and impromptu escape that will catch up to him later when he tries to negotiate with Fury. But instead his eyes crinkle up and he silently joins in Tony’s whoops of ‘Freedom!’ and Hulk’s happy roars.
Everything is going to be alright, Steve will make sure of it.
Before:
“I know this must be a shock for you,” says Fury and Steve has to resist the urge to tell him that, yes, this is a shock, thank you for stating the obvious. But he doesn’t. He doesn’t think he can say anything ever again, not without thinking of who should be there (I’ll take you out dancing, just one dance, be there, I will, I promise, I will) and who isn’t (reaching out from the moving train, ready to jump into the snowy mountains after him.)
Instead he merely nods numbly, stares at the brightly lit square that the projector is emitting. A few seconds ago he just saw a slideshow of moving pictures (in full colour) that gave a brief (life is never brief) overview of the past few decades. He has learned that he wasn’t really needed to end the war. They found a different weapon. They built a bomb (He wonders if Dr. Erskine ever knew Einstein) and they dropped it on cities of civilians.
He’s learned of nuclear warfare, the Cold War, Korean War, famines, massacres, political drama that makes his head buzz with calculations while his heart aches. He’s learned of technological advancements and SHIELD’s mission statements.
It’s just so much; so many words and pictures, overlapping the images in his head of propeller planes and burning cities, of machine gun fire and nights spent in the snow. And it’s... it’s...
“If it’s alright with you, sir, I’d like to be alone right now,” He says instead and Fury nods. The room is cleared out and it isn’t until Steve’s delicate hearing can detect no footsteps, that he lets his head hang in his hands.
Oh god... why did you let me live?
-
They give him clothes. They tell him that everything will be provided for. His meals are in the cafeteria. He will have to train to keep his body in shape (not that the serum isn’t capable of doing that without the training, but its routine.) They’ll stock the toiletries and provide him with entertainment if he wishes. They want him to feel at home here.
But it is a cage.
Steve doesn’t want to walk out of this tiny grey room. He’s hesitant to learn more of this strange world, half expecting to wake up to heaven or hell any moment. Peggy would be disappointed in him. The Howling Commandos would laugh at his antics while Colonel Phillips would call him a coward He thinks that Dr. Erskine would have understood, Bucky would (always) and they would not begrudge him time to adjust.
It’s masochistic but he spends that time learning how to use the touch screen tablet that SHIELD has provided. Spends time reading article after article of news and modern lingo, about teen suicides and family homicides. He reads about the assassinations of great men and the conflicts in different countries. He reads about the planet slowly dying because human beings are stupid, even seventy years later and-
He throws the tablet against the ground. It breaks, and the sound of the shattering covers his.
-
They gave him a pad of paper. He made some experimental scribbles on it, but ends up making black coils of looping ink, unable to make sense of anything on the page.
-
On the third day, Fury comes in, blank-faced and with arms behind his back. He sees the crumpled pad of paper in Steve’s hands and takes an unwelcome seat beside him.
“You can’t stay hidden from the world forever, Captain.”
Steve gives a chuckle. It comes out as dark and bitter, so unfamiliar to who he is. “With all due respect, sir, I don’t know what this world is anymore.”
“It’s still the same place.”
“I’m not sure anymore,” Steve finds himself admitting.
“You’re Captain America,” Fury tells him, “and you found something worth fighting for when it seemed like the world was going to end, back in 1942. It’s still here, soldier, if you start looking again. You have to let go of your past now and do your job.”
He shakes his head. “Is that what I am now? Your soldier?”
Fury takes the rumpled sketchbook from Steve’s hands. He doesn’t say what they’re both thinking-What else is there for you to do? That was what you were made for, what you chose to be. This why SHIELD is invested in you-but says.
“Not mine. The world’s.”
One of the crumpled pages slips out from the sketchbook; it’s a smudged portrait of Peggy and Bucky. They are vibrant, like they’ll walk off the page and cuff Steve over the shoulder. Fury picks it up and drops it into the waste bin with the sketchbook.
“The world needs Captain America. It’s time to stand up, soldier.”
-
Later, after the Chitauri, after requesting to find different living quarters, only to be rejected, Steve finds that crumpled sketchbook in his waste bin. He takes it out, remembering those words as he tries to smooth out the last few pages. The Peggy and Bucky picture has become smudged with grey streaks, like shadows and light are caressing the figures.
You’re Captain America. You have to let go of your past now and do your job.
Steve Rogers finds a pencil and he begins to draw.
-
Now:
It looks to be night time in the city. Hulk jumps from roof top to roof top by Tony’s direction. “Careful there, don’t jump there, big guy. You’ll fall through the roof,” Tony says from time to time while muttering orders to JARVIS here and there. Steve slowly lets his head lean against the Hulk’s neck, closes his eyes for a few breaths.
“Why didn’t you try breaking out earlier, Tony?” Steve speaks up quietly. He has to lean over the Hulk’s neck to see the man’s face. “You and Hulk certainly could have. I know neither of you do well in captivity.”
Tony blinks incredulously, “You hadn’t woken up yet.”
Steve brings the IV contraption closer. “...And...?”
“You didn’t give any orders yet.”
“Oh.” It’s so uncharacteristic of Tony that Steve doesn’t know what to say to that. “Tony, about earlier...”
“JARVIS just gave me the data that you asked me to hack,” The billionaire interrupts. “Seems that Fury does know about Coulson... they were doing experiments on him too”-Steve freezes, he doesn’t even know how he’ll tell Clint and Natasha about that-“I just don’t know what kind yet. Those files are encrypted and it’ll take me a while to break the code... Damn it...”
It’s quiet again but then Tony shouts, “When I see Fury again, I’m going to make his other eye disappear, and then I’ll blow up his stupid base and throw him in a long-ass coma, see how he likes it.”
Steve doesn’t respond.
“...It was all too easy, don’t you think?” He wonders out loud. “Fury has more than enough manpower to subdue all of us, at least I think so. We still don’t know how many Chitauri are out there. We don’t know when they’ll attack or what exactly they want or who they took.”
Tony frowns and Steve promises to explain later, back at the apartment.
“I don’t know what Fury’s game is,” he admits. Everything feels so surreal, “He’s keeping all these secrets, telling us bits and pieces.”
“Well, I’ll figure it out from these files. Fury can’t hide his secrets from me.”
Steve smiles. “I know you will. I trust you.”
Tony is giving him that strange expression again, twisted and dark. “Stars...”
“Home with paintings!” Hulk booms. Both men stare up in surprise to see Steve’s apartment. The Hulk is practically dancing on his feet before he grabs hold of the bottom balconies and begins to climb up to the top floor.
Seeing the building again makes Steve’s chest constrict and ache with a sudden longing that surprises him. He wants to see Natasha and Clint at breakfast again, wants to hear Clint play the cello, to see Natasha water her plants, wants to spar with them and play cards. He wants to see Bruce discuss physics and gamma rays with Tony in enthusiasm in the living room, pictures Thor coming to visit from Asgard.
They’re all I have.
Hulk lands on Steve’s balcony, making it shake. Quickly, Tony flies off from Hulk’s right shoulder to hover next to Steve, reaching out with his hand, probably to help Steve down when-
The glass doors slide open. Natasha and Clint storm onto the balcony, looking murderous and unkempt.
“Where the hell have you been?!”
Part 5 coming soon!
Previous: Part 1 / Part 2a / Part 2b / Part 3a / Part 3b / Part 4a
A Comforting Presence
IV. Fury (cont)
“You owe me, stars,” Tony jokes quietly.
“Oh really?”
“Yeah. You got blood all over my suit. It’ll take ages to wash off.”
He closes his eyes, unable to fight the quirk of his lips. “I’ll try to bleed less next time.”
“Right,” there’s a sour note to Tony’s voice. “Next time.”
The tension in the room shifts then and Steve takes the moment to study the billionaire’s appearance with more care.
Tony’s clothes are a mess. He’s wearing the same trousers from before, the bottom left legging stained still from drops of alcohol. His beard, Steve can see now, is unusually unkempt, longer than usual with little grooming. There are bags under his eyes and more lines on his face than Steve remembers. Guiltily, Steve recalls the circumstances that led to this.
“I’m sorry,” He tells him, “about before. I should have told you about Agent Coulson and I am just... so... sorry, Tony. It’s my fault.”
Like he is shrugging off the veils of sleep, Tony jumps up in his chair, staring at Steve as if he’s insane. “What the hell are you talking about, Stars?”
Steve opens his mouth to reply but Tony cuts him off.
“You’re sorry? God, what are you apologizing for? I’m the one who should be...,” Tony runs a bony hand through his hair, “Fuck, do you have any idea what I-” He stops again, cursing and pacing the room. “I just, you were... I thought... Hell, Stars, just,” he take a deep breath and looks at him warily with an attempt at a smile, “consider that behind us. I shouldn’t have... you know it’s... I...”
He grimaces, clenching his fists and glaring at the floor.
“...Tony...,” says Steve.
“No, Stars, stop,” the man snaps before he swears at himself again and takes another deep breath. “Look... it’s just... Hulk wasn’t letting anyone near you. They had to come get me and well... you weren’t moving, Cap. And the last thing that I said... well...”
“Tony,” Steve is getting up now, the tubes attached to his arms moves with him, jerk with his veins.
“No, Cap, don’t get up-”
“It wasn’t your fault, I should have-”
“Yes it was!”
They stare at each other. Steve wants to reach out, to fix this somehow because he’s not sure when or how it became so wrong. But his brain isn’t summoning any words. It’s all blank and when he opens his mouth, he’s sure that more stupid things will come out.
But Tony turns away, “Never mind. I just, I’ll let you rest for now, Captain.”
“Wait, please, you should know that I don’t blame you at all. I trust you; I really do, Tony, with my life-”
“Well you shouldn’t,” he snaps, his face twisting before it shifts into something wearier, more tired and intense. “Just get some sleep, Stars.”
He moves towards the door and Steve tries to get up-“Tony please”-even attempts to pull out the IV lines in his skin to go after him and just explain things because he doesn’t think he can bear leaving things unspoken again (just one week, cap.) The machines are being knocked together. One almost falls over onto the bed, over his lap but Steve stops it with one hand.
“Whoa there, soldier!” Tony rushes over and pushes him back against his pillows. He scowls at him, “What the hell do you think you’re doing, Rogers? You’re not even fully healed yet.”
“Don’t go,” Steve says quickly. “We need to talk.”
“Oh god, not this line,” Tony groans automatically and normally this would bother Steve, the way Tony seems to dismiss everything as a joke. But it’s become endearing to him and it’s a sign that Tony is acting as himself again, even if it is a defense mechanism.
“I’m sorry,” Steve looks him in the eye, tries to get him to see. “I’m so sorry about hiding the truth about Coulson from you. I know that it was Clint’s choice and it is his right, his say. But I’m sorry. I knew it would hurt you but I didn’t want to disrespect Clint’s decision. It was wrong of me and I hope you know that.”
Tony opens his mouth, stops, and collapses back in his chair, covering his eyes with his hand. For a minute, Steve is terrified that Tony might explode at him, but the man’s body begins to shake and he is laughing.
“Um...”
“Do me a favour, stars,” Tony turns to him. “Let’s just forget about all that. What I said, everything, it never happened. So we’re cool. It’s cool. Everything is as cool as a cucumber.”
He doesn’t understand that reference. And it doesn’t feel like everything is settled. Steve still senses tension from Tony, an undercurrent of frustration and negative emotions bubbling under the surface of tired eyes. Steve wants to pursue the topic, figure out how Tony is feeling but-
Tony shakes his head. “I said some stupid shit to you, stars. Things I didn’t mean. I hope, I really hope, that you’ll forget about it. I’ve already put the Coulson thing away. I barely know what happened. Coulson? Who’s Coulson? Wasn’t he always alive, unconscious and strapped to a bed?”
His chest feels like its being squeezed painfully. “Tony-”
“Seriously, Cap. Forget it. You’re alive. Frankly, I’m just damn grateful to be speaking to you at all. I thought that I’d never hear you nagging at me again. What’s the world going to do without Captain America, after all? Can’t get a replacement Captain America.”
“...Right,” Steve thinks that his stomach is plummeting, that all the colours that Tony has brought into the bland room have dimmed against the white. “Captain America...”
Tony gives a nervous smile, “So, we’re cool?”
Steve swallows slowly, unable to get rid of the sick feeling inside. He smiles back, “Yes, we are.”
-
“How is Bruce?” Steve inquires when they’ve settled into another awkward silence. Tony has been fidgeting for the past five minutes, looking up at the ceiling, fiddling with the bottom of his shirt, clicking away at a mechanical pen. Steve, well, Steve is used to standing absolutely still. “Is he alright?”
Tony rolls his eyes. “Still hulking out, trapped in the glass cage until he turns back. He’s only calm and doesn’t try to break out if I’m in the cage with him. He’s got the whole facility scared shitless. Except maybe Fury, but that’s Fury, man was born without emotions.”
“What?!” Steve bolts up, the IVs moving with him.
“Whoa there, sit back down for fuck’s sake-”
“Why? Why is he-? Are they-?”
“I’ll tell you when you lie back down on the bed!” Tony shouts.
Steve quickly acquiesces and looks at Tony expectantly. With a long sigh and a look that threatens huge consequences if Steve jeopardizes the serum’s healing process, Tony tells him.
“He’s worried about you. The Hulk, Bruce. They wouldn’t tell us how you were. They’ve kept us here all week, claiming that it’s for national security, the usual stuff. I’m only allowed to see you now because I pulled some strings, made a couple of deals. Might have threatened to let the Hulk loose on all of them as well. But other than that, I’ve been holed up in here, hanging with the Hulk, terrorizing agents...”
Steve glances at him in horror, “They can’t just keep you here against your will. Hulk isn’t going to hurt anyone, as long as they don’t threaten him first-”
“-or his friends, because, you know-”
“Have they even let the Hulk see me?” From Tony’s deadpan expression, Steve can see that they haven’t. “I don’t understand why they’re keeping both of you here. And they haven’t even given you a spare change of clothes?”
“Oh that,” Tony grins dangerously. “No, it’s because I refuse to accept their shitty hospitality. There’s not even cable in that glass cell. Besides, I think the rugged look suits me.”
It certainly did in a strange way (he wanted to sketch the outline of Tony’s face, traced with the brushes of his deep brown beard and mustache), but that wasn’t the point.
“Why are they keeping you here? And don’t they usually tranquilize the Hulk to bring him out of it?”
Tony’s face wrinkles into a similar disgust that Steve feels. “Well, yes, they do tranq him. He just sees SHIELD agents telling him that Captain America is now classified property and goes all Hulk again. As for why they’re keeping us here, I assume it’s because they want us to sign forms searing secrecy.”
Steve’s brow furrows. “Secrecy.”
“Yeah,” Tony’s tone darkens, “They don’t want anyone to know about the Chitauri.”
Immediately the heart monitor races. Steve lets his eyelids fall shut. “How much do you know, Tony?”
“...about the freaky zombie alien that blew up my tower? Not much,” Tony frowns. “It was using my tech... that’s what I remember. Some old bombs that the company used to manufacture.” He glares at the wall. “My own fucking tech.”
He is so still (and far away) in that moment that Steve doesn’t know what to say. But it lasts but half a moment and Tony is smiling again, “Why do you ask?”
Steve frowns, wondering how to ask about Tony, as he glances up at the corners in the ceiling. There are likely cameras recording everything, the whole conversation.
Tony follows his gaze and smirks. “Relax, stars,” He says, “I had Jarvis hack into the system. No one is listening. They’ll hear some pre-recorded shit. Stuff we talked about when we went to lunch, Bach, ACDC...”
His muscles loosen and Steve beams. “Tony, you’re amazing. Thank you,” he misses the surprised look on Tony’s face before he tells him more seriously, “Fury knew about the Chitauri before all this happened.”
Tony freezes, then the man who told him that they are not soldiers returns. “Tell me everything.”
Steve does, from his meetings with Nick Fury to the detailed break-in to find Coulson. Tony needs to know.
-
When he is done, Steve feels like he is floating in the air, a balloon that has been let loose from its ties to the ground. It feels good to have everything out in the open with Tony, reminds him of mission briefings and plans with Colonel Philips, Peggy and Howard. There’s a sense that he’s doing, well, something.
Tony looks furious and for a moment, it is like before, when Tony is helping him find a place to live, a place separate from Steve... and it felt like they might be friends.
The billionaire sits back, stone-faced. “He could have prevented all of this.”
Steve doesn’t argue. With some definite and clear warnings, Tony would have had a better idea of who was stealing his tech. All of them could have been more wary of possible attack.
“He said that it was classified information. What does he have to gain from that?” Steve speculates.
“Or what does he have to hide?” Tony seems to echo. “Seems like his proverbial skeleton in the closet is bigger than we think.”
“I don’t like it,” Steve admits, “that we’re being used this way.”
Tony shrugs bitterly, “Welcome to the real world, stars, where everyone you know will stab you in the back.”
The words tear at Steve and he grips the sheets tightly.
“Well then, we won’t let them.”
Tony stares at him incredulously as if he can’t believe that Steve would say such a thing and he continues, “This isn’t right. What else would you expect me to do?” He doesn’t let Tony answer, doesn’t want to know what Tony thinks Steve would decide instead, “Now, Tony, I know you hacked into SHIELD’s headquarters before with Bruce. Think you can do it again with no one finding out?”
Slowly Tony begins to grin again, his eyes gleaming, “Oh, Stars, you’re talking to a genius here. I’ll take care of it.”
“I never had a single doubt,” Steve replies softly.
-
“Where’s Stark?” Fury asks when he marches through the doors. “Thought he’d still be here grovelling or talking your ears off.”
Steve looks away. He’s doodling the beginnings of Tony’s beard beside a shaded sketch of the Hulk. “He left. Had to check on Bruce. Weren’t you going to debrief me on the Chitauri?”
Fury scowls, “And they say you have no cheek.”
“Don’t know what you’ve been reading about me, sir, but I’ve always had a running mouth,” Steve remarks nonchalantly.
Fury throws a thick folder onto the sheets. Agent Hill comes in, rolling what Steve recognizes as a projector, the same kind that they used to try and introduce him to twenty first century technology. She leaves, giving a curt salute to Fury and a wary nod towards Steve.
“There are some things that you should know now,” he says and then he plugs in the projector.
-
“We told you that we burned the Chitauri’s bodies... but that wasn’t entirely true.”
The images from the projector change from the SHIELD logo to images taken of labs, labs that Steve recognizes from the hospital that he broke into with Clint and Natasha (He wonders if they’ve been keeping themselves safe while he’s been gone.) There is the same giant screen, same white walls and glass columns and tubes, attached to a machine.
Except these massive glass tubes are not glowing blue as they were when he last saw them. They are filled with ice.
And Steve can see the bodies of eight Chitauri sitting in each tube. And around them, there are stretchers, stretches holding more alien corpses.
Steve feels sick.
“We kept some of the bodies,” The image changes to a close-up of an alien dissection. It must be the heart and the lungs, just as red as a human’s would be, “and experimented on them.”
He can’t stop looking at the crimson pooling up in the alien bodies.
“Why?” He asks. “Just... why?”
Fury’s gaze is neutral. “You know why, Captain. We need the advantage. We have to stay ten steps ahead of the enemy and for that to work, we need information-on their anatomy, their weaknesses and strengths, where they come from, how to defeat them again if the time comes.”
“But they were all killed...! Unless they weren’t...”
The silence confirms it.
“We thought that the Chitauri operated on a hive mentality, with the mothership as the head controlling all the workers. If it was destroyed, then they all died.”
“But that wasn’t the case.”
“No.”
“...They were sleeping,” Steve realizes.
Fury nods. “Yes. The ones that weren’t cremated were in some kind of stasis or hibernation. We think that they were aware the entire time, through all the dissections and experiments... But they didn’t wake. Didn’t have enough energy to. Something about their mothership shutting down cut off their primary energy source.”
The slide changes to another image, one that Steve is shockingly familiar with, the same bright blue.
“The tesserect...”
“Not exactly,” says Fury. “Pieces of the original tesserect. We believe the cube to be one of these pieces.” And they are. They are little jagged pieces that appear to have been chipped off of the cube that Steve remembers Schmidt holding. They glow brightly in another glass tube, kept separate from the others. These things are minuscule compared to the tesserect, like grits of salt that have been placed carefully on a glass slide.
Steve has a foreboding premonition as Fury continues.
“It was only when we experimented with this energy source... that they awakened.” The photos that flash next are blurry and unclear, but Steve can make out the outline of a Chitauri soldier’s face as it slashes the camera apart. “They took some of our people and our technology, as well as the pieces of the tesserect.”
“What?” Natasha had said that the cube was capable of destroying the planet. These small things, could they-?
“Those pieces aren’t powerful enough to destroy us all,” Fury says, “but they are capable of destroying an entire block, if they wanted to, maybe even an entire city. The question is... why haven’t they done that yet?”
“Revenge,” Steve whispers, recalling the alien that had blown up Stark Tower. “They’re after us personally, all the avengers, and SHIELD, because we massacred their entire race in one blow.”
Fury doesn’t answer.
“You said that they took other people. Who did they take?”
“That’s classified-”
“Who did they take?” Steve demands again. “I need to know. I need to know everything. I can’t rush into this without all the pieces. I can’t protect anyone that way.”
“Captain, listen to me, you’re not going to be protecting anyone anymore,” The director informs him. “The Avengers initiative is being shut down. We’re taking you all back and dealing with each of you in the manner that will most benefit the safety of the world. You’re SHIELD property again, Captain. We can’t let you go out there.”
It’s cold again. It’s suddenly so cold that Steve can’t stand it.
“No,” he whispers. “You can’t. Tony isn’t part of SHIELD! And Tony, he’s, well he’s Tony Stark, you can’t just...”
“Naturally Iron Man will still be seen in public. SHIELD doesn’t have jurisdiction over him”-thank god, Steve thinks-“yet. But the Hulk is a threat, considered unstable when provoked. Since we have no means to terminate him, he’ll be kept under surveillance.”
“You can’t do that,” they can’t, Steve won’t let them, “What about Natasha, Clint, they left, they’re not-”
“A danger to national security. Considered renegades. We’ll have to terminate them.”
“Don’t you dare,” and Steve is out of bed, standing on unsteady feet. The sketchbook and blanket have fallen on the floor. “You said that the world needed the Avengers once. Well, it still does, so why are you disbanding us?”
“Because there isn’t a team left, Captain Rogers,” Fury shouts. “You’ve went your separate ways. The Black Widow and Hawkeye have abandoned SHIELD. Stark could care less about the initiative unless the world was fucking ending. Banner wants nothing to do with us... and you; you’ve become a wild card, Rogers.”
He thinks that this is how the ice felt, numb and unfeeling. It’s how his dreams feel these days, suffocating. The more he breathes in, the more he chokes.
“Please... don’t do this. You can have my blood whenever you need it, for your research, your experiments, just not my team.”
The director is unfazed. “We would have it anyways. You’re ours now.”
“No,” Steve says fiercely. “You wouldn’t. I will fight you. I won’t cooperate. Your drugs will have no effect on me unless you use them at colossal doses and I doubt that you can spare the resources to keep me drugged all the time. I’ll even end my own life if I have to and you won’t have the perfect specimen to study for the serum anymore.”
Fury is still. “Are you abandoning the world, Cap? Just like that?”
“No, I’m abandoning SHIELD too if you don’t leave my teammates alone. The world needs Captain America on their side. If I was to disappear, what would you tell them? That you threatened me? Regardless, I’ll do my best to protect it, but just not on your side.”
Fury lets out a sharp grunt. “And do you think that they’ll fight alongside you? The other avengers? They don’t want to be heroes... not like you.”
“It’s not about being the hero. It’s about doing what’s right and someone has to do it. I’m not asking them to stand beside me,” and he doesn’t, not when the world has betrayed them. They have their reasons. They have no obligations to follow him any longer now that they’re not part of SHIELD. “I can stand on my own.”
“They’ll call you a vigilante. You’ll be arrested.”
“Then so be it.”
For a minute, he thinks Fury might try to restrain Steve, to stop him from leaving. But then Fury is laughing, actually laughing as if Steve cannot believe his eyes (was there something funny in what he said?)
“...I... is this another test?”
Fury just shakes his head, “You’re the real deal, aren’t you, Captain? Fine, I won’t report Agent Barton and Romanoff’s actions to the council yet, so long as you continue doing missions from SHIELD, Rogers, and cooperate... with everything that we ask of you. But if they step out of line...”
“They won’t,” Steve says quickly.
Fury claps his shoulder, the most chilling look present in his eyes. “See to it that they don’t.”
-
“Um, sir?” Steve asks as Fury is preparing to leave the room.
“What is it, Rogers?”
“That news... about disbanding the Avengers Initiative... that wasn’t just a test, was it?”
The director sighs, and for the first time, Steve sees how tired he really is. “Unfortunately, Rogers. No. It wasn’t.”
He can only see the back of Fury’s coat. “You didn’t issue out this order... did you?”
Fury pauses but he doesn’t get to answer because then Agent Hill bursts through the doors.
Her expression is blank save for her panicked eyes. “Sir, it’s the Hulk... he got out.”
“Fuck, what is this? The official day of murder and mayhem? Lead the way, Agent Hill,” Fury follows her, he glares at Steve, who is trying to gather up his machines to go after them. “Stay put, Captain.”
“No,” Steve stumbles towards the door. “This is my team. I’m not going to let anyone hurt him. I told you that I’d handle it and I will.”
Fury gives an exasperated sigh, “Well then, fucking hurry up.”
-
“What the hell is going on here? Stark, what are you doing?!”
Tony is sitting on Hulk’s right shoulder, leaning back casually and observing the broken glass around the Hulk’s prison. He has the Iron Man suit on, but no mask, so Steve can see how casually Tony is observing the scene. Agents dressed in suits of blue or black surround them both, pointing their tranquilizers towards the Hulk but hesitant to shoot lest they hit Tony.
“Might have told my buddy here that you were holding Cap against his will,” Tony shrugs. “He might have thrown a baby whale-sized tantrum. Hard to tell.”
The Hulk grins dangerously at them, breathing through his teeth. Steve, held up in the back by the small crowd of agents, thinks that he sees some men shiver in their boots.
“Get down from there, Stark!” Fury shouts.
“How about ‘no’? I like looking down on all of you for once. This must be why Barton nests in high places all the time.”
“Not the point, Stark, get down!” Hill snaps at him.
But the Hulk roars at them all, baring his teeth. His voice makes the floor beneath them vibrate. Several of the agents step back involuntarily.
“The big guy does not approve,” Tony whistles.
Fury’s eye twitches, “Stark-”
“I don’t know about you,” Tony interrupts, “but I’d rather listen to the big green rage monster instead of you right now.”
Steve limps forward, pushing his way through the bodies of stiff men and women. The IV is wheeled behind him, tripping over polishes shoes as Steve makes his way to Hill and Fury.
“Where Cap!?” Hulk all but howls his demand. He raises his arms up, while Tony shifts over on the Hulk’s shoulders to get a better view of his audience. “Bring Cap or Hulk smash!”
Hulk lunges forward and every agent points his or her weapons towards him, fingers ready on the trigger. They are just about to shoot, for fear that the Hulk is really going to lash out at them physically, when Steve shouts, “Wait!”
He moves in front of the Hulk, just in time. Hulk stops and his demeanour changes when he sees Steve. A wide smile spreads across his face, similar to the one that Steve remembers when he let the Hulk smash freely during the Chitauri invasion.
“Cap!” Hulk leans down and moves to grab Steve with his right hand.
Hill moves her pistol up again and Hulk snarls at her.
“Oh, right, like waving your gun around at him will work again,” Tony drawls.
“Tell them to stand down, director,” Steve says calmly. “The Hulk isn’t going to hurt anyone.”
Fury frowns impassively. “You can’t be sure about that, Cap.”
“I know what I’m talking about.”
Steve dares Fury silently to go against his word. He still doesn’t know what Fury is playing at, whether he is on their side completely or not. He’s beginning to think that not everything is as it seems and he has more questions about why SHIELD wants to dismantle the avengers, about the Chitauri. But they can wait.
He wants to know what Fury will decide.
With one hand raised, Fury motions for his people to lower their weapons. Steve sighs gratefully and then Hulk’s fingers warp around him with surprising gentleness. The green giant lifts him and the IV contraption to his other shoulder.
“Thanks Hulk,” Steve smiles. He holds on to the metal pole of the IV contraption with his left hand. The right one still feels weaker than usual. It may be a day or two before he feels completely healed, at least physically.
“Alright, Hulk, now put Stark and Captain Rogers back down,” Fury orders without pause. It makes Steve wonder if Fury even knows how to be afraid (but that’s not true, he remembers seeing a slight flicker of fear, when Fury yelled the reasons for the Avengers being disbanded...)
Hulk growls, backing up a step and raising his hands protectively over Steve and Tony. “No. Hulk take Cap and Shiny Iron home!”
“He’s being hostile again, sir. Permission to defend?” Hill asks quickly, though her fingers twitch over her gun hoister.
“For fuck’s sake, it’s not that hard not to piss off the big guy. Just do what he says. Not that hard!” Tony throws up his hands, “And for the record, I do not like being called after a house hold item. I’m Iron Man, not a flatiron.”
“We can’t let you leave yet-”
Tony raises his right hand, a white circle glowing in the center of the armour’s palm. “I beg to differ.”
“I think,” Steve raises his voice over the rush of weapons clicking back in place, “that for the sake o everyone present, you should let the Hulk escort us back home.”
Fury raises his brow, “I don’t think so, cap. We have documents to sort through. There’s still the matter of your contract with SHIELD and your injuries-”
“We can take care of him,” Tony, surprisingly, snarls. “We’re getting out of here today and that’s that. You really don’t want the big guy or me to smash up the base.”
Hulk makes a punching motion with his hands, as if in agreement.
“We can discuss these things later,” Steve promises, “and I told you that I’d take responsibility for everything.” From his peripheral vision, he sees Tony staring at him suspiciously, “I keep my word.”
The director studies them for a few moments too long.
“Hulk isn’t going to be calm unless he’s with people he knows and trusts,” Tony snaps impatiently.
Fury scowls, “We’ll find you tomorrow Captain. This isn’t over.”
“No,” Tony says so that Steve doesn’t have to, “but this conversation is. Now, Hulk!” Tony turns his blaster to the wall behind him and shoots a hole through it, large enough for the Hulk to run through.
Steve should be horrified, really, he should. There are so many consequences to this wild and impromptu escape that will catch up to him later when he tries to negotiate with Fury. But instead his eyes crinkle up and he silently joins in Tony’s whoops of ‘Freedom!’ and Hulk’s happy roars.
Everything is going to be alright, Steve will make sure of it.
Before:
“I know this must be a shock for you,” says Fury and Steve has to resist the urge to tell him that, yes, this is a shock, thank you for stating the obvious. But he doesn’t. He doesn’t think he can say anything ever again, not without thinking of who should be there (I’ll take you out dancing, just one dance, be there, I will, I promise, I will) and who isn’t (reaching out from the moving train, ready to jump into the snowy mountains after him.)
Instead he merely nods numbly, stares at the brightly lit square that the projector is emitting. A few seconds ago he just saw a slideshow of moving pictures (in full colour) that gave a brief (life is never brief) overview of the past few decades. He has learned that he wasn’t really needed to end the war. They found a different weapon. They built a bomb (He wonders if Dr. Erskine ever knew Einstein) and they dropped it on cities of civilians.
He’s learned of nuclear warfare, the Cold War, Korean War, famines, massacres, political drama that makes his head buzz with calculations while his heart aches. He’s learned of technological advancements and SHIELD’s mission statements.
It’s just so much; so many words and pictures, overlapping the images in his head of propeller planes and burning cities, of machine gun fire and nights spent in the snow. And it’s... it’s...
“If it’s alright with you, sir, I’d like to be alone right now,” He says instead and Fury nods. The room is cleared out and it isn’t until Steve’s delicate hearing can detect no footsteps, that he lets his head hang in his hands.
Oh god... why did you let me live?
-
They give him clothes. They tell him that everything will be provided for. His meals are in the cafeteria. He will have to train to keep his body in shape (not that the serum isn’t capable of doing that without the training, but its routine.) They’ll stock the toiletries and provide him with entertainment if he wishes. They want him to feel at home here.
But it is a cage.
Steve doesn’t want to walk out of this tiny grey room. He’s hesitant to learn more of this strange world, half expecting to wake up to heaven or hell any moment. Peggy would be disappointed in him. The Howling Commandos would laugh at his antics while Colonel Phillips would call him a coward He thinks that Dr. Erskine would have understood, Bucky would (always) and they would not begrudge him time to adjust.
It’s masochistic but he spends that time learning how to use the touch screen tablet that SHIELD has provided. Spends time reading article after article of news and modern lingo, about teen suicides and family homicides. He reads about the assassinations of great men and the conflicts in different countries. He reads about the planet slowly dying because human beings are stupid, even seventy years later and-
He throws the tablet against the ground. It breaks, and the sound of the shattering covers his.
-
They gave him a pad of paper. He made some experimental scribbles on it, but ends up making black coils of looping ink, unable to make sense of anything on the page.
-
On the third day, Fury comes in, blank-faced and with arms behind his back. He sees the crumpled pad of paper in Steve’s hands and takes an unwelcome seat beside him.
“You can’t stay hidden from the world forever, Captain.”
Steve gives a chuckle. It comes out as dark and bitter, so unfamiliar to who he is. “With all due respect, sir, I don’t know what this world is anymore.”
“It’s still the same place.”
“I’m not sure anymore,” Steve finds himself admitting.
“You’re Captain America,” Fury tells him, “and you found something worth fighting for when it seemed like the world was going to end, back in 1942. It’s still here, soldier, if you start looking again. You have to let go of your past now and do your job.”
He shakes his head. “Is that what I am now? Your soldier?”
Fury takes the rumpled sketchbook from Steve’s hands. He doesn’t say what they’re both thinking-What else is there for you to do? That was what you were made for, what you chose to be. This why SHIELD is invested in you-but says.
“Not mine. The world’s.”
One of the crumpled pages slips out from the sketchbook; it’s a smudged portrait of Peggy and Bucky. They are vibrant, like they’ll walk off the page and cuff Steve over the shoulder. Fury picks it up and drops it into the waste bin with the sketchbook.
“The world needs Captain America. It’s time to stand up, soldier.”
-
Later, after the Chitauri, after requesting to find different living quarters, only to be rejected, Steve finds that crumpled sketchbook in his waste bin. He takes it out, remembering those words as he tries to smooth out the last few pages. The Peggy and Bucky picture has become smudged with grey streaks, like shadows and light are caressing the figures.
You’re Captain America. You have to let go of your past now and do your job.
Steve Rogers finds a pencil and he begins to draw.
-
Now:
It looks to be night time in the city. Hulk jumps from roof top to roof top by Tony’s direction. “Careful there, don’t jump there, big guy. You’ll fall through the roof,” Tony says from time to time while muttering orders to JARVIS here and there. Steve slowly lets his head lean against the Hulk’s neck, closes his eyes for a few breaths.
“Why didn’t you try breaking out earlier, Tony?” Steve speaks up quietly. He has to lean over the Hulk’s neck to see the man’s face. “You and Hulk certainly could have. I know neither of you do well in captivity.”
Tony blinks incredulously, “You hadn’t woken up yet.”
Steve brings the IV contraption closer. “...And...?”
“You didn’t give any orders yet.”
“Oh.” It’s so uncharacteristic of Tony that Steve doesn’t know what to say to that. “Tony, about earlier...”
“JARVIS just gave me the data that you asked me to hack,” The billionaire interrupts. “Seems that Fury does know about Coulson... they were doing experiments on him too”-Steve freezes, he doesn’t even know how he’ll tell Clint and Natasha about that-“I just don’t know what kind yet. Those files are encrypted and it’ll take me a while to break the code... Damn it...”
It’s quiet again but then Tony shouts, “When I see Fury again, I’m going to make his other eye disappear, and then I’ll blow up his stupid base and throw him in a long-ass coma, see how he likes it.”
Steve doesn’t respond.
“...It was all too easy, don’t you think?” He wonders out loud. “Fury has more than enough manpower to subdue all of us, at least I think so. We still don’t know how many Chitauri are out there. We don’t know when they’ll attack or what exactly they want or who they took.”
Tony frowns and Steve promises to explain later, back at the apartment.
“I don’t know what Fury’s game is,” he admits. Everything feels so surreal, “He’s keeping all these secrets, telling us bits and pieces.”
“Well, I’ll figure it out from these files. Fury can’t hide his secrets from me.”
Steve smiles. “I know you will. I trust you.”
Tony is giving him that strange expression again, twisted and dark. “Stars...”
“Home with paintings!” Hulk booms. Both men stare up in surprise to see Steve’s apartment. The Hulk is practically dancing on his feet before he grabs hold of the bottom balconies and begins to climb up to the top floor.
Seeing the building again makes Steve’s chest constrict and ache with a sudden longing that surprises him. He wants to see Natasha and Clint at breakfast again, wants to hear Clint play the cello, to see Natasha water her plants, wants to spar with them and play cards. He wants to see Bruce discuss physics and gamma rays with Tony in enthusiasm in the living room, pictures Thor coming to visit from Asgard.
They’re all I have.
Hulk lands on Steve’s balcony, making it shake. Quickly, Tony flies off from Hulk’s right shoulder to hover next to Steve, reaching out with his hand, probably to help Steve down when-
The glass doors slide open. Natasha and Clint storm onto the balcony, looking murderous and unkempt.
“Where the hell have you been?!”
Part 5 coming soon!