(no subject)
So, lots has happened since my last....REAL journal update. Hah, lately Ive just been trying to use my journal to talk to my Katherine...though that doesn't always work either. I miss you lots Katherine...get online so I can talk to youuuuuuuuu!!! I love ya babe.
So, well...I had a job at McDonald's....yes..that's right...I said HAD. The one week that I worked there...I ended up being so exhausted, that whenever my alarm would go off to take my meds...I would wake up...turn off my alarm and go back to sleep. *DUN DUN DUN* Which means Sarah went a week without taking her medication.
Tiff, if you're wondering, yes that's the reason I quit...pretty much.
I ended up having some weird panic/paranoia attack at work. So, Im standing in the back of the store, where they store everything and Im crying, and shaking...and just FREAKING out. Im sorry Tiffani, I really shouldn't have bothered you at all with that. I know I put more stress on you, and for that Im sorry.
The only way I could think of getting myself away from all those people...was of course...to quit. Because if I had just walked out...I would have been fired anyway. Therefore, I told Roslynn(sp?) one of the managers that I was quitting....keep in mind, at this time..I was still crying and shaking..not able to get a good intelligable word out of my mouth...lol. She tried getting an explanation out of me..but at the time...Id idn't know I wasn't taking my medication..therefore I had NO clue what was going on. Or why I was freaking out.
Tiff, that's the exact reason why I couldn't explain to you why I quit on the phone....because...well..I didn't really know. It was an irrational thing to do..but rational at the same time. It was more on instinct than anything that I quit. Im not made out to work for the public that way anyway...I coudln't handle it....especially not when I was off meds...hell no.
That's also why I retreated from your house so quickly Tiff...I ran to mine...which Ive been holed up in for a day or two..and Im taking meds again..Im starting to feel better. Which is....good.
The fact that I was having a bad day (as was Tiffani) that day, was another reason that I freaked out.
I fucking wanted to see Junior..but...If George was going to take Keith off his insurance..I guess I can understand. We can't drive there without insurance..what would have happened had he gotten into a wreck? And I know Keith can act irrationally on the road (as can I, especially in my dad's truck because I can't tell if Ive slowed down enough or not...that's another story). So, I can understand that.
Another thing, my mom had called a bit earlier one day and she was crying because she missed me. That just tore my heart apart. :( Oh well..
Im going to get an application at Jade today (grocery store).
Fear not! Just because I quit doesn't mean Im not going to get another job..hahaha.
Oh noo..Sarah most certainly is going to try to get another job.
But for the time being...that also means no pot for Sarah if she has to take drug tests.
That's the hard part. I was very tempted last night..but I resisted.
GO ME!
I guess that's it though.
:)
So, well...I had a job at McDonald's....yes..that's right...I said HAD. The one week that I worked there...I ended up being so exhausted, that whenever my alarm would go off to take my meds...I would wake up...turn off my alarm and go back to sleep. *DUN DUN DUN* Which means Sarah went a week without taking her medication.
Tiff, if you're wondering, yes that's the reason I quit...pretty much.
I ended up having some weird panic/paranoia attack at work. So, Im standing in the back of the store, where they store everything and Im crying, and shaking...and just FREAKING out. Im sorry Tiffani, I really shouldn't have bothered you at all with that. I know I put more stress on you, and for that Im sorry.
The only way I could think of getting myself away from all those people...was of course...to quit. Because if I had just walked out...I would have been fired anyway. Therefore, I told Roslynn(sp?) one of the managers that I was quitting....keep in mind, at this time..I was still crying and shaking..not able to get a good intelligable word out of my mouth...lol. She tried getting an explanation out of me..but at the time...Id idn't know I wasn't taking my medication..therefore I had NO clue what was going on. Or why I was freaking out.
Tiff, that's the exact reason why I couldn't explain to you why I quit on the phone....because...well..I didn't really know. It was an irrational thing to do..but rational at the same time. It was more on instinct than anything that I quit. Im not made out to work for the public that way anyway...I coudln't handle it....especially not when I was off meds...hell no.
That's also why I retreated from your house so quickly Tiff...I ran to mine...which Ive been holed up in for a day or two..and Im taking meds again..Im starting to feel better. Which is....good.
The fact that I was having a bad day (as was Tiffani) that day, was another reason that I freaked out.
I fucking wanted to see Junior..but...If George was going to take Keith off his insurance..I guess I can understand. We can't drive there without insurance..what would have happened had he gotten into a wreck? And I know Keith can act irrationally on the road (as can I, especially in my dad's truck because I can't tell if Ive slowed down enough or not...that's another story). So, I can understand that.
Another thing, my mom had called a bit earlier one day and she was crying because she missed me. That just tore my heart apart. :( Oh well..
Im going to get an application at Jade today (grocery store).
Fear not! Just because I quit doesn't mean Im not going to get another job..hahaha.
Oh noo..Sarah most certainly is going to try to get another job.
But for the time being...that also means no pot for Sarah if she has to take drug tests.
That's the hard part. I was very tempted last night..but I resisted.
GO ME!
I guess that's it though.
:)