Anxiety and Kitten pics
I have been somewhat unsociable lately. There has been a lot happening and I have felt the need to conserve my energies and withdraw a little into myself.
My son is now settled in up in Queensland with my brother, so that is one less ongoing problem, at least for now.
Tygrr's immigration is progressing well. I already have five Statutory Declarations collected with three more promised within the next week. For those unfamiliar with the immigration process, part of the paperwork we must submit are Statutory Declarations from people who know us vouching for the fact they think we are a genuine couple and not just a couple trying to rip the system off. They require a minimum of two of these things but the more you have the stronger your case is. I think eight should be pretty good. On top of that I have tons of receipts, bills and postcards etc from the last two years all in joint names, plus over forty photographs to add as 'evidence' of our relationship. I have also printed off some of our journal entries as I think they reflect our relationship well. We only have to write our own Statutory Declarations about the details of our relationship and then ALL the paperwork is done.
Tygrr is adjusting pretty well to her new job, although it is the second week and that is always the hardest physically. I am adjusting pretty well with the increased domestic workload now she is working full time and am managing ok with the two big boogeymen of my life - cooking daily and doing the grocery shopping.
I WAS going ok about the relief of financial pressure this job seemed to represent too.
Was.
Then we got a phone call from our mechanic yesterday. Tygrr's car has been in the workshop since Monday because it was getting difficult to get into gear. I had hoped it was just that the clutch might need adjusting. Nope, not that simple. Apparantly her clutch is not worn out or her cable loose. No, her car had to do it in style. The clutch has disintergrated, resulting in loose bits of metal being spat into her gearbox. The entire thing has to be pulled down - clutch and gearbox. The mechanic will know more maybe later this week but we are looking at rebuild or replace the clutch and gearbox @ approximate cost of $1200!
Well, that was the straw that tripped the camel for a day or so. I felt so disheartened that just when we get a bit of financial relief along comes a huge bill. Hell, tygrr hasn't even been working long enough yet to get to save. She only got paid her first full week's pay today! Plus we were scheduled to pay a $500 phone bill this week - yeah, it's big, but it's the one with all the mobile phone calls on it from when we were on holidays. I had allocated money for it but a lot of that had gotten used with getting tygrr to and from work at the new job and bridging the gap between her last paycheck at the old job and her first full paycheck at this one.
So,one of my biggest stressors multiplied and had triplets. There was a long discussion about whether to replace the car or repair it etc. We ended up chosing to repair it. Tygrr was of the opinion that if she bought herself a new car she would get what she wanted - a Ford Escape. New they are between $30000 and $42000 depending on what model you get. Second hand they are from $20000 to $27000. That would add up to BIG repayments. Second hand she would still have repair bills as it ages. Even new she would have the regular servicing necessary for the warrantee. AND she would have a huge debt over her head. I don't know that many folks know this or not, but we dont' owe money usually. We have been so poor for so long we have not been able to afford debt. The thought of going into that much debt just totally appalled us both.
For one third of the cost of new or replacement she could make her current car like brand new if she had to. SO when we looked at the costs of alternatives the $1200 for repairng this one didn't seem so bad after all. We also took into account what we have already fixed on it, and what we might have to fix in the next couple of years and it still works out cheapest by a long shot to repair the car she has. It still suits her lifestyle perfectly and it's bodywork is in excellent shape - no rust at all. Tygrr decided that to take some pressure off me (I am the one who does the household budget and manages the money) she would ask for a loan from the Bank of Mom. At least these days we can make it a loan, not just have to ask for her help with no hope of repaying like it used to be before tygrr was allowed to work out here.
So, the Bank of Mom is loaning us the money and she will be paid back by the end of February with no repayments starting til after christmas, which does take the pressure off now a little.
But the worrywort that I am fretted about the fact we had a debt that we need her job to pay for. I had been cautious about the continuity of this job, hoping it wasn't just a pre-christmas rush type of job, but trying not to expect it to last past christmas just in case. The LAST thing I wanted was to feel we needed it to last. So, to compensate my fretting a little, tygrr asked about it last night when she went to work. It seems it is not just a pre-christmas job as the factory are genuinely short of nightshift workers (which I had been hoping was the case) and besides, their line of production (electrical componants) don't usually get a sales rush at christmas time.
So, that kinda helped me to relax. I am very serious about managing our finances and keeping a roof over our heads. For so long it has mainly been my money that has paid for that, and the prospect of tygrr earning a decent wage at last was like the camel smelling water in the desert and hoping like mad it wasn't a mirage. But at the same time, I worried that I might be pushing tygrr to work somewhere she may not have been that happy with, just to get the money and relieve my own stress. But today we talked about that too, and she assured me she actually enjoys her job and likes the people she has to work with.
On top of that, I recognised yesterday that I was having a mini-meltdown about it all and made sure I did some serious work on myself last night with my hypnotherapy. I woke up feeling much better today. More positive, even if still a little gunshy about it. Time will fix that, when I see the continuity of her employment and income. I will be happier too when our debt to the Bank of Mom is repaid fully. I hate being in debt.
So, to refocus on something positive, there is an introduction to make and it finally ties in with the title. We have lost some cats over the winter - between the road and two just mysteriously disappearing and most of the ones we have lost have belonged to troll. So, when we were at the fodder store last week getting hay for the piggies, she spotted this little fella.
Meet Seth.
He is quite the cutie - pure black, except for the tongue
And has quite made himself at home
Technically he is troll's kitten, but he just loves everyone. He will curl up with tygrr just as readily as coming to sleep in the footstool next to me while I am online. He goes to bed with troll every night but is currently asleep on my desk in front of me as I write this entry. He's such a happy, playful little chap - he's totally irresistable. Of course, troll comes home from school and growls at us for stealing her kitten while she isn't here. A new kitten is just what was need just now with all the stress that has been happening.
So I am hoping that most of the stress is behind us now. This week is nearly over, we have solutions to most of our problems - we just have to have a little faith in them. Or I should say 'I' have to have a little faith in them.
I commented to tygrr today that my mind is like when we go gardening. We have rocks in our gardens over here - ornamental ones. To tidy up around them sometimes we lift them and move them. When we do lots of bugs scuttle out from underneath them and run away. Lift the next rock and a whole lot more bugs scuttle away. Every time you lift a rock there are bugs hiding under it. The recent events in our life has shown me that I still have bugs under my rocks in my head. I work on my issues, deal with them and improve myself and my life but then my circumstances change and I discover another lot of bugs under another bloody rock! Either that or there is one main one that keeps eluding me as I try to track it down, scuttling away whenever I get close, and hiding until I unearth it again, or on days like yesterday, pouncing out on me unexpectedly. I clearly still have some mental pest control to do yet!
My son is now settled in up in Queensland with my brother, so that is one less ongoing problem, at least for now.
Tygrr's immigration is progressing well. I already have five Statutory Declarations collected with three more promised within the next week. For those unfamiliar with the immigration process, part of the paperwork we must submit are Statutory Declarations from people who know us vouching for the fact they think we are a genuine couple and not just a couple trying to rip the system off. They require a minimum of two of these things but the more you have the stronger your case is. I think eight should be pretty good. On top of that I have tons of receipts, bills and postcards etc from the last two years all in joint names, plus over forty photographs to add as 'evidence' of our relationship. I have also printed off some of our journal entries as I think they reflect our relationship well. We only have to write our own Statutory Declarations about the details of our relationship and then ALL the paperwork is done.
Tygrr is adjusting pretty well to her new job, although it is the second week and that is always the hardest physically. I am adjusting pretty well with the increased domestic workload now she is working full time and am managing ok with the two big boogeymen of my life - cooking daily and doing the grocery shopping.
I WAS going ok about the relief of financial pressure this job seemed to represent too.
Was.
Then we got a phone call from our mechanic yesterday. Tygrr's car has been in the workshop since Monday because it was getting difficult to get into gear. I had hoped it was just that the clutch might need adjusting. Nope, not that simple. Apparantly her clutch is not worn out or her cable loose. No, her car had to do it in style. The clutch has disintergrated, resulting in loose bits of metal being spat into her gearbox. The entire thing has to be pulled down - clutch and gearbox. The mechanic will know more maybe later this week but we are looking at rebuild or replace the clutch and gearbox @ approximate cost of $1200!
Well, that was the straw that tripped the camel for a day or so. I felt so disheartened that just when we get a bit of financial relief along comes a huge bill. Hell, tygrr hasn't even been working long enough yet to get to save. She only got paid her first full week's pay today! Plus we were scheduled to pay a $500 phone bill this week - yeah, it's big, but it's the one with all the mobile phone calls on it from when we were on holidays. I had allocated money for it but a lot of that had gotten used with getting tygrr to and from work at the new job and bridging the gap between her last paycheck at the old job and her first full paycheck at this one.
So,one of my biggest stressors multiplied and had triplets. There was a long discussion about whether to replace the car or repair it etc. We ended up chosing to repair it. Tygrr was of the opinion that if she bought herself a new car she would get what she wanted - a Ford Escape. New they are between $30000 and $42000 depending on what model you get. Second hand they are from $20000 to $27000. That would add up to BIG repayments. Second hand she would still have repair bills as it ages. Even new she would have the regular servicing necessary for the warrantee. AND she would have a huge debt over her head. I don't know that many folks know this or not, but we dont' owe money usually. We have been so poor for so long we have not been able to afford debt. The thought of going into that much debt just totally appalled us both.
For one third of the cost of new or replacement she could make her current car like brand new if she had to. SO when we looked at the costs of alternatives the $1200 for repairng this one didn't seem so bad after all. We also took into account what we have already fixed on it, and what we might have to fix in the next couple of years and it still works out cheapest by a long shot to repair the car she has. It still suits her lifestyle perfectly and it's bodywork is in excellent shape - no rust at all. Tygrr decided that to take some pressure off me (I am the one who does the household budget and manages the money) she would ask for a loan from the Bank of Mom. At least these days we can make it a loan, not just have to ask for her help with no hope of repaying like it used to be before tygrr was allowed to work out here.
So, the Bank of Mom is loaning us the money and she will be paid back by the end of February with no repayments starting til after christmas, which does take the pressure off now a little.
But the worrywort that I am fretted about the fact we had a debt that we need her job to pay for. I had been cautious about the continuity of this job, hoping it wasn't just a pre-christmas rush type of job, but trying not to expect it to last past christmas just in case. The LAST thing I wanted was to feel we needed it to last. So, to compensate my fretting a little, tygrr asked about it last night when she went to work. It seems it is not just a pre-christmas job as the factory are genuinely short of nightshift workers (which I had been hoping was the case) and besides, their line of production (electrical componants) don't usually get a sales rush at christmas time.
So, that kinda helped me to relax. I am very serious about managing our finances and keeping a roof over our heads. For so long it has mainly been my money that has paid for that, and the prospect of tygrr earning a decent wage at last was like the camel smelling water in the desert and hoping like mad it wasn't a mirage. But at the same time, I worried that I might be pushing tygrr to work somewhere she may not have been that happy with, just to get the money and relieve my own stress. But today we talked about that too, and she assured me she actually enjoys her job and likes the people she has to work with.
On top of that, I recognised yesterday that I was having a mini-meltdown about it all and made sure I did some serious work on myself last night with my hypnotherapy. I woke up feeling much better today. More positive, even if still a little gunshy about it. Time will fix that, when I see the continuity of her employment and income. I will be happier too when our debt to the Bank of Mom is repaid fully. I hate being in debt.
So, to refocus on something positive, there is an introduction to make and it finally ties in with the title. We have lost some cats over the winter - between the road and two just mysteriously disappearing and most of the ones we have lost have belonged to troll. So, when we were at the fodder store last week getting hay for the piggies, she spotted this little fella.
Meet Seth.
He is quite the cutie - pure black, except for the tongue
And has quite made himself at home
Technically he is troll's kitten, but he just loves everyone. He will curl up with tygrr just as readily as coming to sleep in the footstool next to me while I am online. He goes to bed with troll every night but is currently asleep on my desk in front of me as I write this entry. He's such a happy, playful little chap - he's totally irresistable. Of course, troll comes home from school and growls at us for stealing her kitten while she isn't here. A new kitten is just what was need just now with all the stress that has been happening.
So I am hoping that most of the stress is behind us now. This week is nearly over, we have solutions to most of our problems - we just have to have a little faith in them. Or I should say 'I' have to have a little faith in them.
I commented to tygrr today that my mind is like when we go gardening. We have rocks in our gardens over here - ornamental ones. To tidy up around them sometimes we lift them and move them. When we do lots of bugs scuttle out from underneath them and run away. Lift the next rock and a whole lot more bugs scuttle away. Every time you lift a rock there are bugs hiding under it. The recent events in our life has shown me that I still have bugs under my rocks in my head. I work on my issues, deal with them and improve myself and my life but then my circumstances change and I discover another lot of bugs under another bloody rock! Either that or there is one main one that keeps eluding me as I try to track it down, scuttling away whenever I get close, and hiding until I unearth it again, or on days like yesterday, pouncing out on me unexpectedly. I clearly still have some mental pest control to do yet!