I must have been Kissing a fool

[ms_catwoman79]

YES! It's officially over between me and John.I ended things with him by saying "I get the feeling you aren't happy, and you don't want to be in this relationship"? He said "Whatever its up to you". Then he said "Good luck," I said with what "Life". I said "Oh, i will be fine". He said "okay, then have a good night". I said "Okay, bye". And it was over. When i feel fear in my body and it takes me back to my childhood. Its over. We have a fight over something dumb. He told me, if i made him mad when i was there...He'd act worst towards me and do something worst. I told how he scared me last time. And, i can't deal with that. He said come over or not then. And we hung up. I hung up the phone crying. I can't deal with this crap. I don't need it, deserve it. I am a sucker for loser's. I am so over this...I am actually been over this whole thing for weeks. It just now hit me. Why am I wasting my time on him.? He does nothing for me! I drvie up there to hang out...He's come to sac one fucking time. I realize he's a 40 year old loser...I feel like a fool..like i've been used for my kindness. And i hate that feeling. I've alos lost some friends because i miss alot of stuff...during this almost year being with this fool.

My life is just beginning. I don't need someone holding me back. I actually feel pretty good breaking up with him. I have some weight off of me. He wanted me to do things i didn't want to do. I felt aduse at times. I never want that again. It was hard but i had to do it. I have some dishes and a hair dryer over his place..But, i don't want them. I don't want anything. I just want the peace of mine that i am safe and no GUY wil ever hurt me.