Fic: Alien Probe
Title: Alien Probe
Characters: Ten, Donna
Spoilers: None. Well, casting for S4 which I just spoiled in the character line.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor.
A/N: Riiiiiight. No idea where this came from. Not even a sniff of Doctor/Rose in it. It's very very short - about 400 words.
"So what exactly do you find when you look up people's asses?"
The Doctor's eyes grew wide at one Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, but currently standing in the console room after having been rescued from a very flat, and very mind-sucking Thinkivore. (Which obviously named itself long before having acquired the mental prowess to realize the complete lameness of calling itself a 'Thinkivore.' However that, as they say, is another story.)
Since the TARDIS was currently blasting through space-time and Donna was currently attempting not to wet herself, he figured he was on his own.
"What??" Brilliant, and was nineteen words simpler than saying, 'Are you a mental patient, and if so, do I need to be concerned or provide you with any meds?'
Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, leaned over to get a good look at the Doctor's backside. "Seems like they'd be pretty similar. Unless you eat out of it or something."
Donna, tears running down her face, now appeared to be biting his beloved comfy chair, which probably meant more duct tape.
"WHAT??" Again, brilliant, and was twenty-seven words simpler than saying, 'I now realize that you are a mental patient, and I just want to say that I've got a sonic screwdriver and I know how to use it.'
"Is the whole probing thing a kink?"
"Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, I can honestly say, without a hint of deceit, that I have not, do not have, and never will have the urge, want or desire to probe you. In fact, if the 1,940,235,998,342,067.02 to 1 probability of me finding myself on the probing end of your ass were ever to occur, I would be willing to spend a good ten years of my life dedicated to the sole purpose of finding a way around having to look anywhere near that area. By the way, can I call you Nick?"
"Uh...sure."
"Good. That was getting annoying."
Donna sat up in an attempt to compose herself, wiping her face. The Doctor sighed. More duct tape would definitely be needed.
"So...are we talking anyone's ass, or just mine? I wash, you know."
The Doctor slammed the coordinates to the State of Colorado in the twenty-first century into the console as Donna fled the room.
Characters: Ten, Donna
Spoilers: None. Well, casting for S4 which I just spoiled in the character line.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor.
A/N: Riiiiiight. No idea where this came from. Not even a sniff of Doctor/Rose in it. It's very very short - about 400 words.
"So what exactly do you find when you look up people's asses?"
The Doctor's eyes grew wide at one Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, but currently standing in the console room after having been rescued from a very flat, and very mind-sucking Thinkivore. (Which obviously named itself long before having acquired the mental prowess to realize the complete lameness of calling itself a 'Thinkivore.' However that, as they say, is another story.)
Since the TARDIS was currently blasting through space-time and Donna was currently attempting not to wet herself, he figured he was on his own.
"What??" Brilliant, and was nineteen words simpler than saying, 'Are you a mental patient, and if so, do I need to be concerned or provide you with any meds?'
Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, leaned over to get a good look at the Doctor's backside. "Seems like they'd be pretty similar. Unless you eat out of it or something."
Donna, tears running down her face, now appeared to be biting his beloved comfy chair, which probably meant more duct tape.
"WHAT??" Again, brilliant, and was twenty-seven words simpler than saying, 'I now realize that you are a mental patient, and I just want to say that I've got a sonic screwdriver and I know how to use it.'
"Is the whole probing thing a kink?"
"Mister Nick Park, twenty-first century resident of the State of Colorado, I can honestly say, without a hint of deceit, that I have not, do not have, and never will have the urge, want or desire to probe you. In fact, if the 1,940,235,998,342,067.02 to 1 probability of me finding myself on the probing end of your ass were ever to occur, I would be willing to spend a good ten years of my life dedicated to the sole purpose of finding a way around having to look anywhere near that area. By the way, can I call you Nick?"
"Uh...sure."
"Good. That was getting annoying."
Donna sat up in an attempt to compose herself, wiping her face. The Doctor sighed. More duct tape would definitely be needed.
"So...are we talking anyone's ass, or just mine? I wash, you know."
The Doctor slammed the coordinates to the State of Colorado in the twenty-first century into the console as Donna fled the room.