Mini crackfic.
A mini crackfic for goldy_dollar who wanted the Doctor and Rose to get really drunk one night and play around with the desktop theme on the TARDIS, only to wake up to a jungle, which included a bear-cat about to eat them.
Rating? Uh...PG? For use of hypervodka?
The Doctor slowly woke up, realizing one thing: he was wet. His face was wet, to be more precise. He felt a warm body snoring against his chest, which was Rose. That much he was aware of, at least. Had she been licking his face?
No, something was dripping on him. Huh.
He opened his eyes to a tongue hanging over him. "WHOA!"
Rose jerked awake.
"Rose, stay perfectly still," he said in a very low and very calm voice. Rose being Rose, she attempted to move, but the Doctor firmly held her in place.
*drip*
"Nice kitty. Bear. Thing."
"Oh my God, there's an animal in the TARDIS? What is it?"
"A kitty bear thing."
*drip*
"So helpful."
"Not exactly something I've seen before, Rose."
"Let me guess...big teeth?"
"Lots of big teeth, yes."
*liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick*
The Doctor sputtered. "And an enormous tongue."
It licked him again.
"What's it doing?"
"Giving me a bath? A bath... Oh. OH!!" The Doctor sat up, which made Rose sit up as well, giving her her first look at the animal. He grabbed its head and gave it a good pet. "Goooood bear-cat. Who's a good bear-cat?"
*drip*
She rubbed at her own head. "I know half the time I shouldn't even bother asking..."
"It's the shower, Rose!"
Rose blinked at him. "Sorry?"
"Well, one of them. There're bound to be more wandering around somewhere. Hmmm." The Doctor took in his surroundings and scratched his head. "We obviously were playing with the desktop theme last night. It's starting to come back to me. As well as the hypervodka shots..."
"I guess that explains the swamp around the console."
*drip*
The Doctor patted the bear-cat. "Someone needs a new washer."
"Doctor, please, please, please tell me you can change this back."
"Oh, sure. Flip of a switch, so to speak."
"Good. I was picturing bear-cat baths in my future." She shuddered. "Hold on, why would the shower have teeth?"
"You use a loofah, don't you?"
Rating? Uh...PG? For use of hypervodka?
The Doctor slowly woke up, realizing one thing: he was wet. His face was wet, to be more precise. He felt a warm body snoring against his chest, which was Rose. That much he was aware of, at least. Had she been licking his face?
No, something was dripping on him. Huh.
He opened his eyes to a tongue hanging over him. "WHOA!"
Rose jerked awake.
"Rose, stay perfectly still," he said in a very low and very calm voice. Rose being Rose, she attempted to move, but the Doctor firmly held her in place.
*drip*
"Nice kitty. Bear. Thing."
"Oh my God, there's an animal in the TARDIS? What is it?"
"A kitty bear thing."
*drip*
"So helpful."
"Not exactly something I've seen before, Rose."
"Let me guess...big teeth?"
"Lots of big teeth, yes."
*liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick*
The Doctor sputtered. "And an enormous tongue."
It licked him again.
"What's it doing?"
"Giving me a bath? A bath... Oh. OH!!" The Doctor sat up, which made Rose sit up as well, giving her her first look at the animal. He grabbed its head and gave it a good pet. "Goooood bear-cat. Who's a good bear-cat?"
*drip*
She rubbed at her own head. "I know half the time I shouldn't even bother asking..."
"It's the shower, Rose!"
Rose blinked at him. "Sorry?"
"Well, one of them. There're bound to be more wandering around somewhere. Hmmm." The Doctor took in his surroundings and scratched his head. "We obviously were playing with the desktop theme last night. It's starting to come back to me. As well as the hypervodka shots..."
"I guess that explains the swamp around the console."
*drip*
The Doctor patted the bear-cat. "Someone needs a new washer."
"Doctor, please, please, please tell me you can change this back."
"Oh, sure. Flip of a switch, so to speak."
"Good. I was picturing bear-cat baths in my future." She shuddered. "Hold on, why would the shower have teeth?"
"You use a loofah, don't you?"