Obscure Boundaries-- Chapter 8
'Crap,’ Yoochun thought as little droplets of rain started showering down on him from the canopy of the thick, lush forest. He picked up speed to avoid the oncoming storm and soon saw the massive shadow of his sleek, silver Audi waiting at the opening of the trail.
‘That was a refreshing hike though. I should do it more often.’
Keeping his eyes trained on the road, the looming thunderstorm burst out in full force with the rain cascading down his windshield mercilessly and the wind lapping ruthlessly against trees and road signs. But he felt a tiny tingling inside of him that, in a way, urged him to look to his left. What he saw frightened him, and a sense of panic rose its way at an alarming pace up Yoochun’s body, consuming him with dread of what might soon happen.
Stopping his engine, not caring about the stinging pelting of the rain, he burst out of his car and ran hastily towards the figure on the sandy beach that was pounding and kicking on the sand with a wild, fiery rage. He then let out a scream that pierced through into the depths of Yoochun’s heart, rendering him completely dumbstruck and speechless. Such a cry of anguish and grief, the soulful wailing of a lost man penetrating through even the thunderous roaring of the storm and waves. As the figure stood up, Yoochun recognized him.
It was Junsu.
Junsu…
‘My eggplant…’
Junsu was teetering dangerously close to the shore line.
Then he walked into the waves…
~*~*~*~*~
‘It’ll all just be easier if I kill myself. Everyone’s lives would be easier that way. Then I can finally be at rest, not care about anything. I’m tired… I’m really tired. I should just remove myself like a pencil marking. I’m not worth the hassle of even being ink, I’m just that insignificant. This is my fate. I’m sorry, I’ve waited too long, so here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. I'm not worth any tears. Let the waves take me…’
And with that, Junsu stepped into the waves, releasing one last, single tear that snaked its way down Junsu’s face.
“JUNSU NOOOOOO!!!” but Junsu couldn’t hear anything, already reaching the state of disconsolateness, feeling nothing but the ocean and it’s welcoming waves, waving him into it’s depth.
But then he felt a pair of strong, warm arms engulfing him from behind, adamant in its placing, don’t willing to let Junsu go. He then heard a deep, soothing voice reverberating in his ears.
“Don’t leave Junsu. Your life is an open book. Don’t close it before it's done.”
Turning Junsu towards him, Yoochun firmly seized him into a tight embrace. “And I want to be a part of this book all the way to the epilogue. Will you let me?”
Junsu couldn’t talk.
He couldn’t even breathe.
The only thing he could do was grasp tightly onto Yoochun and cry even harder.
Yoochun gripped him even tighter, consoling him with small shhh’s and gentle, rhythmic strokes on his back. He was so glad that Junsu was finally willing to weaken his defenses and let his brilliantly constructed façade crumble.
And he was glad he was the one who made that happen.
~*~*~*~*~
Junsu found an odd sense of solace and comfort in Yoochun’s arms that he never would’ve expected to find immense relief in since his mother died 2 years ago.
“Come on, let’s go home and get warmly dressed. We don’t want to be sick for the musical…”
On the car ride back, everything was deathly silent.
Junsu was recovering from his near-death experience, and Yoochun was mulling over how to take the next step without scaring Junsu away.
“My house is right up in that detour. It’s in a cove near the cliff.”
‘Junsu’s lives in that gigantic beach house that I’ve been jealously admiring for several years?’
Yoochun eyed Junsu warily to see any signs of a prank, only to find a very fatigued man, staring despondently out of the window.
‘What is he thinking…?’
~*~*~*~*~
As Yoochun finished showering, he stepped out into the extensive living room and saw Junsu curled up in a ball with a thick blanket wrapped around him and a mug of steaming honey tea in his hands. He was sitting on the ledge beside the vast glass windows that overlooked the sea.
“Your cup is on the coffee table.”
After a moment of comfortable silence, each lost in their own world, Junsu was the one to break the silence.
“At first you begin to feel yourself sliding into the shadows and then complete isolation from life. Then things begin to lose their color. Bright fiery reds of flowers and topaz blues of the sky fade to a grey and bleak shadow that seems to overwhelm me. I can no longer see or hear things that are pleasing to me anymore. Dark thoughts of fear and failure dwell within my mind almost constantly. I feel numb to the world and people around me. I want to be left alone because it takes so much work to hide the true pain and sadness I am feeling. I soon realized after everything that happened to me, people didn’t turn away from me because they felt sorry for me. They turned away because they didn’t care. The moment I made up my decision to walk into that ocean, I believed that I could take away everyone’s discomfort by ending it there. Only… you seemed to see through that. You persisted and fought through my shield… Thank you… for believing in me.”
Junsu looked at Yoochun, his eyes shimmering with fresh, grateful tears.
Yoochun thought that Junsu looked so beautiful, yet so vulnerable that Yoochun wanted to envelope him in a hug again.
"’The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.’ Jim Rohn once said. You bottled up everything and in return, there was no room left for happiness to come in. I really do hope you release all your pent up frustrations at me, with me, or anyway you think that can truly let you open up and be liberal and free again.”
Junsu frowned, pondering over what Yoochun had just said. Why is he always so understanding?
“People say time will heal all wounds. But I have one question for you: How much time will it take for this pain to go away?”
Yoochun stared intently at Junsu for a while, making him feel a little uncomfortable.
“Honestly, I don’t know. But we can create the answer together…
And Junsu, never frown, because you never know who fell in love with your smile,” Yoochun added in, giving Junsu a bright, sincere smile of his own.
“Thank you Yoochun.”
And Junsu smiled for the first time since his mother died…
A/N: credits to the songs that gave me inspiration for this chapter>>>{And Then I Turned Seven, Goodbye}{Metallica, Mama Said}
btw, i mean smile for the first time as in Junsu smiling to someone else other than Isabella (:
I’m so glad I finally got down to writing this (even tho it’s kinda short >< I wanted this chapter to be especially dedicated to yoosu since 8 is my favorite number :D also, 8 means infinity to yoosu is gonna be together forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!) KYAAAAAA!!!!! YOOSU ARE FINALLY TOGETHER!!!!! WOOT WOOT *^^*
‘That was a refreshing hike though. I should do it more often.’
Keeping his eyes trained on the road, the looming thunderstorm burst out in full force with the rain cascading down his windshield mercilessly and the wind lapping ruthlessly against trees and road signs. But he felt a tiny tingling inside of him that, in a way, urged him to look to his left. What he saw frightened him, and a sense of panic rose its way at an alarming pace up Yoochun’s body, consuming him with dread of what might soon happen.
Stopping his engine, not caring about the stinging pelting of the rain, he burst out of his car and ran hastily towards the figure on the sandy beach that was pounding and kicking on the sand with a wild, fiery rage. He then let out a scream that pierced through into the depths of Yoochun’s heart, rendering him completely dumbstruck and speechless. Such a cry of anguish and grief, the soulful wailing of a lost man penetrating through even the thunderous roaring of the storm and waves. As the figure stood up, Yoochun recognized him.
It was Junsu.
Junsu…
‘My eggplant…’
Junsu was teetering dangerously close to the shore line.
Then he walked into the waves…
~*~*~*~*~
‘It’ll all just be easier if I kill myself. Everyone’s lives would be easier that way. Then I can finally be at rest, not care about anything. I’m tired… I’m really tired. I should just remove myself like a pencil marking. I’m not worth the hassle of even being ink, I’m just that insignificant. This is my fate. I’m sorry, I’ve waited too long, so here's my goodbye, no one will cry over me. I'm not worth any tears. Let the waves take me…’
And with that, Junsu stepped into the waves, releasing one last, single tear that snaked its way down Junsu’s face.
“JUNSU NOOOOOO!!!” but Junsu couldn’t hear anything, already reaching the state of disconsolateness, feeling nothing but the ocean and it’s welcoming waves, waving him into it’s depth.
But then he felt a pair of strong, warm arms engulfing him from behind, adamant in its placing, don’t willing to let Junsu go. He then heard a deep, soothing voice reverberating in his ears.
“Don’t leave Junsu. Your life is an open book. Don’t close it before it's done.”
Turning Junsu towards him, Yoochun firmly seized him into a tight embrace. “And I want to be a part of this book all the way to the epilogue. Will you let me?”
Junsu couldn’t talk.
He couldn’t even breathe.
The only thing he could do was grasp tightly onto Yoochun and cry even harder.
Yoochun gripped him even tighter, consoling him with small shhh’s and gentle, rhythmic strokes on his back. He was so glad that Junsu was finally willing to weaken his defenses and let his brilliantly constructed façade crumble.
And he was glad he was the one who made that happen.
~*~*~*~*~
Junsu found an odd sense of solace and comfort in Yoochun’s arms that he never would’ve expected to find immense relief in since his mother died 2 years ago.
“Come on, let’s go home and get warmly dressed. We don’t want to be sick for the musical…”
On the car ride back, everything was deathly silent.
Junsu was recovering from his near-death experience, and Yoochun was mulling over how to take the next step without scaring Junsu away.
“My house is right up in that detour. It’s in a cove near the cliff.”
‘Junsu’s lives in that gigantic beach house that I’ve been jealously admiring for several years?’
Yoochun eyed Junsu warily to see any signs of a prank, only to find a very fatigued man, staring despondently out of the window.
‘What is he thinking…?’
~*~*~*~*~
As Yoochun finished showering, he stepped out into the extensive living room and saw Junsu curled up in a ball with a thick blanket wrapped around him and a mug of steaming honey tea in his hands. He was sitting on the ledge beside the vast glass windows that overlooked the sea.
“Your cup is on the coffee table.”
After a moment of comfortable silence, each lost in their own world, Junsu was the one to break the silence.
“At first you begin to feel yourself sliding into the shadows and then complete isolation from life. Then things begin to lose their color. Bright fiery reds of flowers and topaz blues of the sky fade to a grey and bleak shadow that seems to overwhelm me. I can no longer see or hear things that are pleasing to me anymore. Dark thoughts of fear and failure dwell within my mind almost constantly. I feel numb to the world and people around me. I want to be left alone because it takes so much work to hide the true pain and sadness I am feeling. I soon realized after everything that happened to me, people didn’t turn away from me because they felt sorry for me. They turned away because they didn’t care. The moment I made up my decision to walk into that ocean, I believed that I could take away everyone’s discomfort by ending it there. Only… you seemed to see through that. You persisted and fought through my shield… Thank you… for believing in me.”
Junsu looked at Yoochun, his eyes shimmering with fresh, grateful tears.
Yoochun thought that Junsu looked so beautiful, yet so vulnerable that Yoochun wanted to envelope him in a hug again.
"’The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.’ Jim Rohn once said. You bottled up everything and in return, there was no room left for happiness to come in. I really do hope you release all your pent up frustrations at me, with me, or anyway you think that can truly let you open up and be liberal and free again.”
Junsu frowned, pondering over what Yoochun had just said. Why is he always so understanding?
“People say time will heal all wounds. But I have one question for you: How much time will it take for this pain to go away?”
Yoochun stared intently at Junsu for a while, making him feel a little uncomfortable.
“Honestly, I don’t know. But we can create the answer together…
And Junsu, never frown, because you never know who fell in love with your smile,” Yoochun added in, giving Junsu a bright, sincere smile of his own.
“Thank you Yoochun.”
And Junsu smiled for the first time since his mother died…
A/N: credits to the songs that gave me inspiration for this chapter>>>{And Then I Turned Seven, Goodbye}{Metallica, Mama Said}
btw, i mean smile for the first time as in Junsu smiling to someone else other than Isabella (:
I’m so glad I finally got down to writing this (even tho it’s kinda short >< I wanted this chapter to be especially dedicated to yoosu since 8 is my favorite number :D also, 8 means infinity to yoosu is gonna be together forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!) KYAAAAAA!!!!! YOOSU ARE FINALLY TOGETHER!!!!! WOOT WOOT *^^*