The Only Colour Better Than Black Is Transparent Chap 9
A.N.
SO. Ueda and Junno are now in a relationship (?)
May the turmoil begin.
Love does do strange things. But Ueda Tatsuya still had enough composure to speak his mind.
“I’m tired and confused my dearest,” he seethed, “CAN’T YOU JACK OFF QUIETLY AND GO TO SLEEP?!... retarded nymphomaniacs these days…”
He didn’t think Junno would ACTUALLY understand the word ’nymphomaniac’.
Thus, to comfort a CRYING retarded nymphomaniac, Ueda had to cuddle the thing to sleep. In his purple, sheep print pyjama pants.
Theological question of the month: Does love HAVE to be synonymous with utter humiliation?
But to be honest, seeing the cute little snuggle Junno does into his pillow is worth the utter humiliation.
The angel’s eyes softened. He leant closer, feeling Junno’s warm breath on his face and playfully blew a strand of stray hair away.
Then pecked his lips, turned off the light and went to sleep blushing like a schoolgirl.
To Junno’s dismay, Ueda soon drafted a Bill of Congress for their relationship.
1. No Public Displays of Affection in any way, shape or form. (PDA)
2. If you drive my car and crash it, regardless of the insurance, you will scrub the bathroom tiles for a month. And pay for it.
3. You are to get changed in a cubicle after dance practice, not an open space.
4. Get rid of any pornographic material you may own before I hit you thrice for each square centimetre I find.
5. Nobody is allowed to see you in tight pants apart from me.
6. Nobody is allowed to see your skin (arms, lower legs and face exclusive) other than me.
7. You load the dishwasher.
8. You may not flirt with women.
9. You may not flirt with men.
10. If anyone messes with you, don’t fight back or hurt yourself.
11. In the instance of the above article, report them to me so I can beat the shit out of them.
12. Tell me you love me at least 5 times per day.
13. No sex unless I initiate it.
“You can’t be serious~” Junno cried crocodile tears, “Why do I have to load the dishwasher?!”
“Because I do the cooking in case you burn my IKEA kitchen into carcinogenic waste,” Ueda stuck the printed sheet onto the fridge with a magnet, “I’m not insured for people like you to live here!”
Wow. That wasn’t quite the reaction I expected… Why isn’t he mentioning the last article? I wrote it in a different colour too…
“Fine,” Junno puffed out his cheeks in an attempt to look cute, “but I want to call you by another name, a name only I can say!”
“What’s wrong with ‘Ueda-san’?” the angel shrugged, “if you want to move it up to ‘Ueda-sama’, I wouldn’t mind…”
“No! You’re Uepi from now on!” the taller man declared. All he was missing was a full fanfare by podgy men with white socks. Oh the sheer look of GLEE on his face…
“Go die in a cesspit.”
“What about Uepomu?”
“Kill me now….”
“Ukkun?”
“Dear God… where do we keep razor blades in this house?”
“I know!! I’ll just take over ‘Tat-chan’ from Ryo starting tomorrow!! Can I call him now to patent ‘Tat-chan’?”
“Fuck no!! Just call me Uepi from now on!!”
*Taguchi: +1*
*Ueda: 0*
[47 minutes later]
“Hey Uepi,” Juno called from the kitchen, “why have you wrapped all the kitchen knives in bubble-wrap Uepi?”
“I’m going out for a bit. Don’t touch anything that you might kill my house with!” Ueda shouted from the general direction of the front door, “And how did you get into the kitchen?! Can you not read the police tape I put there?!”
“Are you afraid I might hurt myself Uepi??” Junno’s eyes sparkled with happiness.
“I’m afraid that if you don’t stop calling me Uepi, I might cause you grievous bodily harm…”
“But Uepi, you promised me I could call you Uepi and that nobody else is allowed to call you Uepi. Right Uepi?”
“If I don’t come home tonight,” Ueda was thankful that Junno couldn’t see the blush creeping up his face, “it’s because I’m lying in a gutter, vomiting.”
“I know you’re just as happy as I am,” Junno crept up from nowhere and enveloped his lover in a bear hug from behind, “see? You’re red.”
“What are you? A ninja?” Ueda reached up and held Junno’s hands, “Remember not to hurt yourself okay?”
“Your hands are always so cold Uepi…” Junno shivered, completely ignoring the subject, “you should wear gloves.”
“It’s the middle of May!” Ueda scolded gently, “I’d look like an idiot! Now let go, I have to go before I’m late!”
“Sure sure,” Junno smiled, let go, turned Ueda around and seamlessly attached their lips together. “Have a nice time wherever you’re going~” He called after his lover, who was running out the door at close to supersonic speed.
[One hour later]
“Ueda-kun…” professor Nakamaru sipped his latte nervously, “How did you get my contact information?”
“I have my ways.”
“Why did you call me out to Yokohama to drink coffee on a Sunday?” the older man was growing restless. Call him prejudiced, but he never could look at his student the same way again after finding out that the man was an angel. “They haven’t called upon you to personally dispose of my body in the harbour have they?”
“No,” Ueda replied simply, “but what’s stopping me?”
“Your conscience?” Nakamaru hoped for the best.
“You’re very funny in assuming I have one,” the angel laughed, “I’m not going to hurt you just because my wings seem black sir… I just have some.. err…. Rather difficult issues to deal with in a… paper I’m doing.” Never had he told such an obvious lie and had someone actually BELIEVE it.
“I’d be glad to help!” Nakamaru breathed a sigh of relief and started to pick at his strawberry cheesecake with his fork, “What might be the problem?”
“Sensei,” Ueda’s eyes turned serious, “Please pretend that you’re gay.”
The piece of cheesecake went down the wrong tube and came back up again.
“You… what- ack- have-cough-
“Just a supposition!!” Ueda sounded panicked, “Calm down!!!”
Spluttering and red to his ears, Nakamaru finally regained enough composure to take another sip of coffee. “You’re right… I’m sorry. Please continue.”
“Right. Nakamaru-sensei, please pretend that you’re gay and your boyfriend obviously wants to have sex with you but is too nice to you to pressure you to.”
The latte Nakamaru was drinking found its way to stain the entire tablecloth brown. Ueda wondered if his question was too direct or if the man was actually having a fatal allergic reaction to homosexuality.
“Ueda-kun…” Nakamaru threw down a pile of banknotes on the table, “come with me.”
Not once in his life would Ueda have ever imagined that he would be on a ferris wheel overlooking Yokohama harbour with an Ethics professor, on the Sabbath.
The guy at the ticket counter gave them strange looks as Nakamaru dragged Ueda into the nearest available car by his hand.
As the door closed, Nakamaru sighed. “Ueda-kun,” he put his head in his hands, “you give me nothing but havoc… Are you blackmailing me?”
“All I did was ask for your advice on a fictional development some people have to go through!” Ueda moaned, “What makes you so sensitive to these things! Can you give me an answer at all?!”
“In fact I can’t,” Nakamaru didn’t meet his eyes, “Not from a balanced point of view anyway.”
“…Shit… doesn’t that mean you’re-
“What if I’m exactly like your ‘supposed’ scenario?” Nakamaru sounded like he was ready to jump out of the rising ferris wheel car, “God this is embarrassing!”
“We’re on the same page, DAMMIT!”
Both men looked at each other. “Who is it?” they asked at the same time and smiled crookedly.
“You first,” Ueda pushed.
“Respect your elders,” Nakamaru shook his head.
“I’m over 550 years old.”
“…Fine.” The professor looked defeated.
“So? Who is it?” Ueda smirked. It felt so much better to know that he wasn’t the only one in this awkward position.
“…The umm…. Vet student-
“You have GOT to be kidding?!” Ueda burst into laughter, “He’s hardly your type!!! I would have expected someone wearing glasses, majoring in Life and Death Studies!!!” *note, it is an actual course in the Faculty of Letters where Nakamaru works.
“Life and Death Studies is a very prestigious course!” Nakamaru protested, “It requires a very high level of maturity!”
“Fine then,” Ueda failed to hide his amusement, “why Tanaka Koki out of all people?”
“…I don’t know. I filled in for a colleague in General Education two years ago and since then, Koki-kun just ended up following me around. The first time I realized he must be different was when he skipped lectures to fry the prawns he was going to put in my lunch-
“THAT guy cooked you lunch?!” Ueda’s eyes turned googly. Humans never failed to surprise once you start living with them.
“Koki-kun is a VERY good cook actually. I also remember the time when I went with him to a bar to celebrate his 20th birthday… The girls were all over him… That burning sense of jealousy is something that still scares me today.”
“What happened then?”
“I pulled him out of there and forced him to swear never to flirt with other people again,” Nakamaru was beet red, “It was immature but somehow, it tied us together. We’re both not very good at expressing ourselves but it just… works.”
“Sounds like my story without the madness and death,” Ueda’s face fell, “we’re alike in more ways than you can imagine. Maybe Heaven is running out of decent life plots in its idea basket? Apart from the person I punched in the face is a full-time celebrity…”
“I don’t even want to hear that story then,” the professor loosened his tie, “Just the name. Spare me deails.”
“Taguchi Junnosuke.”
You’d think Nakamaru wouldn’t be able to choke on nothing. You’d be wrong. That man is VERY talented in the art of choking.
“You’re kidding.”
“167% serious sir,” the angel groaned, “that’s why I want you to help me out! He avoids the subject but I am SO sure he wants to… you know… do it…”
“I told you that’s what I’m facing too!” the professor started sweating on his forehead, “We tried it once…because he said that the older one tops…and I failed spectacularly and hurt him… Never tried it since. Koki-kun’s too nice to force me into it but it’s so hard knowing that you can’t do what he wants you to and-
“Have you tried just letting HIM do it then?” the answer seemed obvious to Ueda, “Or are you too stuck-up about the age thing?”
“……Maybe.”
The ferris wheel door opened.
As both men hopped out, Nakamaru had a thoughtful expression on his face. “You know what?” he rolled the words around his mouth, “You might be right. Love’s not about positions and superficial things is it?”
“Humans are so slow,” Ueda smiled, “just go home~ and keep me posted. You amuse me professor.”
“If you weren’t 20 times my age I’d be offended,” Nakamaru bowed and waved goodbye, “it was nice talking to you!”
[Ueda residence]
FUCK. I ended up being Nakamaru’s personal counsellor and ended up no further than I started.
“Uepi~” Junno skipped through the bedroom doorway, “Is your laptop annoying you?”
Ueda quickly shut the lid to hide his MSN conversation with Ryo. “No, you are.”
“Never mind that,” Junno bounced onto Ueda’s bed like he owned it, “It’s late! I’m sleepy!”
“Did you brush your teeth?” Ueda reached out to ruffle Junno’s hair. Normally he would have restrained himself, but at home, the habit carries on. The dark brown hair was so fluffy….
“Yes Mom!” Junno laughed and grabbed Ueda shoulders with a long arm, “Bedtime!”
Whatever. I’ll just live each day as it passes… As long as this baka is happy, what could possibly happen to us?
[Next door, Ryo’s house]
“Great,” Ryo stared at his computer screen, “he went offline. Tsk.”
A screeching alarm sounded from his basement. Soon after dashing down the stairs, Ryo no longer had a reason to stay annoyed over something as petty as Ueda logging out of MSN.
The proxy he put up to divert Heaven’s tracking system on Tatsuya had been broken clean through.
Holy fuck… They can see everything now. How can Tat-chan protect Taguchi from Gabriel if he can’t use a single bit of magic?!
A.N. Short chappie I know... I've been so bogged down lately and I'm really sorry to leave everyone on a cliffy T____T but if I'm lucky I'll be able to update again in a few weeks!~
Comments are so loved!
SO. Ueda and Junno are now in a relationship (?)
May the turmoil begin.
Love does do strange things. But Ueda Tatsuya still had enough composure to speak his mind.
“I’m tired and confused my dearest,” he seethed, “CAN’T YOU JACK OFF QUIETLY AND GO TO SLEEP?!... retarded nymphomaniacs these days…”
He didn’t think Junno would ACTUALLY understand the word ’nymphomaniac’.
Thus, to comfort a CRYING retarded nymphomaniac, Ueda had to cuddle the thing to sleep. In his purple, sheep print pyjama pants.
Theological question of the month: Does love HAVE to be synonymous with utter humiliation?
But to be honest, seeing the cute little snuggle Junno does into his pillow is worth the utter humiliation.
The angel’s eyes softened. He leant closer, feeling Junno’s warm breath on his face and playfully blew a strand of stray hair away.
Then pecked his lips, turned off the light and went to sleep blushing like a schoolgirl.
To Junno’s dismay, Ueda soon drafted a Bill of Congress for their relationship.
1. No Public Displays of Affection in any way, shape or form. (PDA)
2. If you drive my car and crash it, regardless of the insurance, you will scrub the bathroom tiles for a month. And pay for it.
3. You are to get changed in a cubicle after dance practice, not an open space.
4. Get rid of any pornographic material you may own before I hit you thrice for each square centimetre I find.
5. Nobody is allowed to see you in tight pants apart from me.
6. Nobody is allowed to see your skin (arms, lower legs and face exclusive) other than me.
7. You load the dishwasher.
8. You may not flirt with women.
9. You may not flirt with men.
10. If anyone messes with you, don’t fight back or hurt yourself.
11. In the instance of the above article, report them to me so I can beat the shit out of them.
12. Tell me you love me at least 5 times per day.
13. No sex unless I initiate it.
“You can’t be serious~” Junno cried crocodile tears, “Why do I have to load the dishwasher?!”
“Because I do the cooking in case you burn my IKEA kitchen into carcinogenic waste,” Ueda stuck the printed sheet onto the fridge with a magnet, “I’m not insured for people like you to live here!”
Wow. That wasn’t quite the reaction I expected… Why isn’t he mentioning the last article? I wrote it in a different colour too…
“Fine,” Junno puffed out his cheeks in an attempt to look cute, “but I want to call you by another name, a name only I can say!”
“What’s wrong with ‘Ueda-san’?” the angel shrugged, “if you want to move it up to ‘Ueda-sama’, I wouldn’t mind…”
“No! You’re Uepi from now on!” the taller man declared. All he was missing was a full fanfare by podgy men with white socks. Oh the sheer look of GLEE on his face…
“Go die in a cesspit.”
“What about Uepomu?”
“Kill me now….”
“Ukkun?”
“Dear God… where do we keep razor blades in this house?”
“I know!! I’ll just take over ‘Tat-chan’ from Ryo starting tomorrow!! Can I call him now to patent ‘Tat-chan’?”
“Fuck no!! Just call me Uepi from now on!!”
*Taguchi: +1*
*Ueda: 0*
[47 minutes later]
“Hey Uepi,” Juno called from the kitchen, “why have you wrapped all the kitchen knives in bubble-wrap Uepi?”
“I’m going out for a bit. Don’t touch anything that you might kill my house with!” Ueda shouted from the general direction of the front door, “And how did you get into the kitchen?! Can you not read the police tape I put there?!”
“Are you afraid I might hurt myself Uepi??” Junno’s eyes sparkled with happiness.
“I’m afraid that if you don’t stop calling me Uepi, I might cause you grievous bodily harm…”
“But Uepi, you promised me I could call you Uepi and that nobody else is allowed to call you Uepi. Right Uepi?”
“If I don’t come home tonight,” Ueda was thankful that Junno couldn’t see the blush creeping up his face, “it’s because I’m lying in a gutter, vomiting.”
“I know you’re just as happy as I am,” Junno crept up from nowhere and enveloped his lover in a bear hug from behind, “see? You’re red.”
“What are you? A ninja?” Ueda reached up and held Junno’s hands, “Remember not to hurt yourself okay?”
“Your hands are always so cold Uepi…” Junno shivered, completely ignoring the subject, “you should wear gloves.”
“It’s the middle of May!” Ueda scolded gently, “I’d look like an idiot! Now let go, I have to go before I’m late!”
“Sure sure,” Junno smiled, let go, turned Ueda around and seamlessly attached their lips together. “Have a nice time wherever you’re going~” He called after his lover, who was running out the door at close to supersonic speed.
[One hour later]
“Ueda-kun…” professor Nakamaru sipped his latte nervously, “How did you get my contact information?”
“I have my ways.”
“Why did you call me out to Yokohama to drink coffee on a Sunday?” the older man was growing restless. Call him prejudiced, but he never could look at his student the same way again after finding out that the man was an angel. “They haven’t called upon you to personally dispose of my body in the harbour have they?”
“No,” Ueda replied simply, “but what’s stopping me?”
“Your conscience?” Nakamaru hoped for the best.
“You’re very funny in assuming I have one,” the angel laughed, “I’m not going to hurt you just because my wings seem black sir… I just have some.. err…. Rather difficult issues to deal with in a… paper I’m doing.” Never had he told such an obvious lie and had someone actually BELIEVE it.
“I’d be glad to help!” Nakamaru breathed a sigh of relief and started to pick at his strawberry cheesecake with his fork, “What might be the problem?”
“Sensei,” Ueda’s eyes turned serious, “Please pretend that you’re gay.”
The piece of cheesecake went down the wrong tube and came back up again.
“You… what- ack- have-cough-
“Just a supposition!!” Ueda sounded panicked, “Calm down!!!”
Spluttering and red to his ears, Nakamaru finally regained enough composure to take another sip of coffee. “You’re right… I’m sorry. Please continue.”
“Right. Nakamaru-sensei, please pretend that you’re gay and your boyfriend obviously wants to have sex with you but is too nice to you to pressure you to.”
The latte Nakamaru was drinking found its way to stain the entire tablecloth brown. Ueda wondered if his question was too direct or if the man was actually having a fatal allergic reaction to homosexuality.
“Ueda-kun…” Nakamaru threw down a pile of banknotes on the table, “come with me.”
Not once in his life would Ueda have ever imagined that he would be on a ferris wheel overlooking Yokohama harbour with an Ethics professor, on the Sabbath.
The guy at the ticket counter gave them strange looks as Nakamaru dragged Ueda into the nearest available car by his hand.
As the door closed, Nakamaru sighed. “Ueda-kun,” he put his head in his hands, “you give me nothing but havoc… Are you blackmailing me?”
“All I did was ask for your advice on a fictional development some people have to go through!” Ueda moaned, “What makes you so sensitive to these things! Can you give me an answer at all?!”
“In fact I can’t,” Nakamaru didn’t meet his eyes, “Not from a balanced point of view anyway.”
“…Shit… doesn’t that mean you’re-
“What if I’m exactly like your ‘supposed’ scenario?” Nakamaru sounded like he was ready to jump out of the rising ferris wheel car, “God this is embarrassing!”
“We’re on the same page, DAMMIT!”
Both men looked at each other. “Who is it?” they asked at the same time and smiled crookedly.
“You first,” Ueda pushed.
“Respect your elders,” Nakamaru shook his head.
“I’m over 550 years old.”
“…Fine.” The professor looked defeated.
“So? Who is it?” Ueda smirked. It felt so much better to know that he wasn’t the only one in this awkward position.
“…The umm…. Vet student-
“You have GOT to be kidding?!” Ueda burst into laughter, “He’s hardly your type!!! I would have expected someone wearing glasses, majoring in Life and Death Studies!!!” *note, it is an actual course in the Faculty of Letters where Nakamaru works.
“Life and Death Studies is a very prestigious course!” Nakamaru protested, “It requires a very high level of maturity!”
“Fine then,” Ueda failed to hide his amusement, “why Tanaka Koki out of all people?”
“…I don’t know. I filled in for a colleague in General Education two years ago and since then, Koki-kun just ended up following me around. The first time I realized he must be different was when he skipped lectures to fry the prawns he was going to put in my lunch-
“THAT guy cooked you lunch?!” Ueda’s eyes turned googly. Humans never failed to surprise once you start living with them.
“Koki-kun is a VERY good cook actually. I also remember the time when I went with him to a bar to celebrate his 20th birthday… The girls were all over him… That burning sense of jealousy is something that still scares me today.”
“What happened then?”
“I pulled him out of there and forced him to swear never to flirt with other people again,” Nakamaru was beet red, “It was immature but somehow, it tied us together. We’re both not very good at expressing ourselves but it just… works.”
“Sounds like my story without the madness and death,” Ueda’s face fell, “we’re alike in more ways than you can imagine. Maybe Heaven is running out of decent life plots in its idea basket? Apart from the person I punched in the face is a full-time celebrity…”
“I don’t even want to hear that story then,” the professor loosened his tie, “Just the name. Spare me deails.”
“Taguchi Junnosuke.”
You’d think Nakamaru wouldn’t be able to choke on nothing. You’d be wrong. That man is VERY talented in the art of choking.
“You’re kidding.”
“167% serious sir,” the angel groaned, “that’s why I want you to help me out! He avoids the subject but I am SO sure he wants to… you know… do it…”
“I told you that’s what I’m facing too!” the professor started sweating on his forehead, “We tried it once…because he said that the older one tops…and I failed spectacularly and hurt him… Never tried it since. Koki-kun’s too nice to force me into it but it’s so hard knowing that you can’t do what he wants you to and-
“Have you tried just letting HIM do it then?” the answer seemed obvious to Ueda, “Or are you too stuck-up about the age thing?”
“……Maybe.”
The ferris wheel door opened.
As both men hopped out, Nakamaru had a thoughtful expression on his face. “You know what?” he rolled the words around his mouth, “You might be right. Love’s not about positions and superficial things is it?”
“Humans are so slow,” Ueda smiled, “just go home~ and keep me posted. You amuse me professor.”
“If you weren’t 20 times my age I’d be offended,” Nakamaru bowed and waved goodbye, “it was nice talking to you!”
[Ueda residence]
FUCK. I ended up being Nakamaru’s personal counsellor and ended up no further than I started.
“Uepi~” Junno skipped through the bedroom doorway, “Is your laptop annoying you?”
Ueda quickly shut the lid to hide his MSN conversation with Ryo. “No, you are.”
“Never mind that,” Junno bounced onto Ueda’s bed like he owned it, “It’s late! I’m sleepy!”
“Did you brush your teeth?” Ueda reached out to ruffle Junno’s hair. Normally he would have restrained himself, but at home, the habit carries on. The dark brown hair was so fluffy….
“Yes Mom!” Junno laughed and grabbed Ueda shoulders with a long arm, “Bedtime!”
Whatever. I’ll just live each day as it passes… As long as this baka is happy, what could possibly happen to us?
[Next door, Ryo’s house]
“Great,” Ryo stared at his computer screen, “he went offline. Tsk.”
A screeching alarm sounded from his basement. Soon after dashing down the stairs, Ryo no longer had a reason to stay annoyed over something as petty as Ueda logging out of MSN.
The proxy he put up to divert Heaven’s tracking system on Tatsuya had been broken clean through.
Holy fuck… They can see everything now. How can Tat-chan protect Taguchi from Gabriel if he can’t use a single bit of magic?!
A.N. Short chappie I know... I've been so bogged down lately and I'm really sorry to leave everyone on a cliffy T____T but if I'm lucky I'll be able to update again in a few weeks!~
Comments are so loved!