The Brilliant Royal Divorce Plan Chapter 59
A.N. Quite a light-hearted chapter.... we've been needing this after all the hopelessness eh? Not my style to update on a Wednesday but somehow I feel like it XD
“If I came to you in fifty years, when I am no longer considered beautiful, will you still love me?”
“If you came to me in two thousand years, a completely different person who can’t even remember me from this life, I will still love you with the same feelings I stand here with today.”
So-called empty words have never made Ueda so happy in his life.
“I’ll take your word. Let’s go Junno,” Ueda sighed, “you have a wedding to attend to.”
The pair edged closer and closer to the palace, hand in hand, when Junno suddenly jerked his head up and stopped walking.
“What’s wrong?” Ueda’s quizzical eyes looked around for any singed of danger.
“Err Tat-chan,” Junno stared at him up and down, “you’re still wearing women’s clothes…”
His lover’s jaw dropped. Time seemed to stop for a completely different reason.
Crap… I was so lost in our moment I forgot I’m still dressed in drag! How am I supposed to walk up to the guards at the gate and demand to be let in if I look like a woman?!?!
“All your fault,” he muttered darkly to Junno, who had his head in his hands.
“But you were so pretty-
“Prettiness isn’t going to get us anywhere! It’s dark, we’re tired and I am not going back to Sapporo city to get a damn change of clothes Taguchi Junnosuke!!” Ueda paced around like a headless chicken. The pride of a king must be protected and one must not be seen in drag by ANYONE lest one become a laughing stock. Ueda knew that much being a man.
Hooves thundered in the distance, closer and closer.
Yelling also came closer and closer.
Closer still, until Ueda could make out a faint ‘both of you are so dead for escaping the palace and leaving us in a mess’.
It was definitely Uchi Hiroki. A very, very pissed and stressed out Uchi Hiroki.
“Umm Tat-chan?” Junno forced a smile, “I’m quite keen to run back to Sapporo to get you that change of clothes…”
“Oh no you don’t,” Ueda replied with mock seriousness, “remember what I said? If we die we die together.”
[Meanwhile, inside the Hokkaido palace]
“Are you finished crying?” Tegoshi stroked Ryo’s tear-stained face, “my leg is dead from your head resting on it…”
“…Sorry,” Ryo muttered and tried to move his head from Tegoshi’s lap.
“Nah it’s okay you big softie,” the cute man’s eyes grew warm, “I know you’ve been under stress lately. But crying on me for an entire day? Being in love with that cousin of mine really has taken a toll on you…”
“I WHAT?!” Ryo almost snapped his back jumping up with shock, “I AM NOT!!!!”
“It’s okay Ryo,” Tegoshi patted the wet stain on his lap calmly, “I can accept that. You know what? I used to hate him for causing you your injury on the wall and seriously wanted to kill you. But I can’t. When I see you, my heart melts to the ground and I can’t hurt you no matter how hard I fucking try I CAN’T STOP LOVING YOU SO I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY OKAY?!?!?!” the calmness had morphed into screaming tears that rivalled Ryo’s.
“Wait stop don’ cry oh my god Tesshi please don’t cry holy shit why are you crying please stop I’M NOT IN LOVE WITH TAT-CHAN!!!!!” was the only semi-coherent sentence Ryo managed to get out after seeing Tegoshi’s tears.
“You don’t have to make me feel better… He’s always had everyone’s hearts wrapped around his little finger. I know he’s beautiful, talented, dangerous, exciting and everything you like-
“He’s not you,” Ryo sighed.
It threw Tegoshi off-guard completely.
“Wha- MPH!” Not even one complete word made is out of his mouth before the pink lips were held captive in Ryo’s.
Both of them tasted salty.
Sensing no reaction from Tegoshi, Ryo daringly nibbled on his bottom lip. Deepening the kiss after Tegoshi granted him access, he ravished every corner of the cavern he had yearned for since long ago. Panting to catch a breath, he stared deeply into Tegoshi’s eyes and cupped the pretty cheeks in his hands weakly.
“I know what I use as excuses,” Ryo sighed, “but if there’s one thing that this ridiculous trip taught me, it’s how lucky we are to be by each other. I don’t give a fuck about being the head of a clan… When we get back, I’ll denounce my title immediately as head of the Nishikido family and get married to you!”
“But-
“Don’t argue with me!”
“…. Aren’t you in love with Tatsuya?” Tegoshi lowered his eyes when a look of outrage filled Ryo’s brimming eyes.
“You STILL think that?! I took an arrow for him, sure. But THAT was because I don’t want YOU to make a mistake you’ll regret for the rest of your life Tesshi!!”
“So you love…”
“YOU! YOU CUTE LITTLE DEVIL!!!” Ryo was exasperated at Tegoshi’s sudden dumbness.
The beautiful man went limp in his arms as soon as the words left his mouth. Hanging loosely off his forearms, Tegoshi remained still as rock.
“YUYA!!!!!”
[Outside the palace]
“YOU TWO ARE SOOO DEAD!!!” Uchi roared at his king and his king’s lover, giving Junno a solid smack over the head. “THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BE GOING WALKIES!!!”
“We’re sorry,” the pair said in unison and tried to fend off another smack.
“Now,” the man on horseback sighed, rubbing his temples, “why is my king in women’s dress?”
“Why are YOU blushing?!” Junno shot back, annoyed. He will never forget nor forgive what he saw outside their door that day, Ueda moaning and spreading his legs for this man. Just when he was clenching his fists, preparing to lash out, he felt a warm hand on his.
Ueda gave his lover a desperate look and shook his head.
Junno forcibly relaxed.
“We cannot have Ueda-sama entering the palace dressed in this…. Monstrosity,” Uchi failed in his bid to hide his own rapidly spreading blush. The truth could not have been further from what he just said. Ueda was absolutely breathtaking in the flowing white kimono.
“EXCUSE me?!” Junno’s jealousy flared again like a hungry flame, “I chose this MONSTROSITY thank you very much Uchi-san!”
“Junno!” Ueda hissed, “Stop it!”
Uchi coughed. “Well monstrosity or not, he is not going into the palace wearing it!”
“What do you expect ME to do about it?” Junno rolled his eyes.
[Later]
“Uchi-san…” Junno’s eyebrow twitched as he seriously considered throwing the man off his horse.
“What’s wrong Taguchi-sama?” Uchi smirked triumphantly, “you look stunning, I promise.”
“I look like a WOMAN,” the emperor of Honshu complained as Ueda stifled a giggle at him.
“Of course you do Junno!” Ueda was enjoying this, “It’s about time I got some revenge after being forced to cross-dress for so long! And your clothes are MUCH more comfortable than mine no?”
“Uchi-san! You can’t make me dress like this just to save the public image of YOUR king!!” Junno’s vigorous head-shaking was threatening to dislodge his hair accessories, “My clothes don’t even fit him that well!”
“I see no problem in doing this actually,” Uchi shrugged a little too gleefully, “let’s go!”
Grabbing Junno’s wrist, he pulled the tall man (dressed as a woman) onto his horse and told Ueda to follow.
Of course the horse walked significantly faster than Ueda, and the latter was trailing behind after a while.
Junno looked back every few seconds, worried. “Hey can I switch places with Tat-chan?” he begged Uchi, “I’ll walk and he can ride the horse with you pleeease?”
“No way!” Uchi shook his head, “it will look too suspicious having a lady walking behind a horse while two men ride it!”
The silence began to get uncomfortable between the two rivals. Both were contemplating whether it would be easier to just kill the other right there.
“Okay Taguchi-sama can I be honest with you?” Uchi finally sighed.
“As much as I don’t like you, can you drop the sama?” Junno rolled his eyes, “I’ve never had a taste for being superior…”
“Sure err, Junno?” Uchi tentatively called.
“How can I help you?” Junno rolled his eyes again.
“To be honest I don’t like you,” Uchi said quite bluntly to the young emperor.
“Gee thanks,” he huffed, “just because I’m in your country and dressed like a girl doesn’t mean you don’t have to respect me as Honshu’s ruler!”
“I really dislike you for other reasons… But Uepi loves you.”
“That’s none of your concern,” Junno blushed, “who he loves, I mean. And don’t call him by such an intimate name!”
Uchi ignored the taller man’s childish complaints.
“I want you to swear on your life that you love him too,” the general gave the horse a firm kick and brought it to a trot, leaving Ueda behind out of earshot.
“How does that bring you any advantage?” Junno was getting confused by all the dizzy bucking of the horse and Uchi’s words.
“It doesn’t. But I want you to promise that no matter how many women you may possess in your lifetime as an emperor, he will be the only one you love-
“I did that long ago for your information,” Junno cut him off, “but why are you doing this to yourself?!”
“Because Uepi is throwing away his entire lifetime to cater for your mistakes! He wouldn’t have to be king of a country he doesn’t even care for if it weren’t for you!! He has no family here, no experience, there are people just waiting for him to slip up then dispose of him!!! Yet he’s taking it all in his stride with no complaints because he knows it will save YOUR life-
“SHUT UP!!! THIS ISN’T MAKING ME FEEL ANY BETTER!!” Junno put two index fingers in his ears and tried to block out the guilt eating away at his very soul.
“IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO!! You WILL get married and you WILL get out of here alive and you owe Uepi undying love AT THE VERY LEAST!!” Uchi gritted his teeth, “it’s the least you can do… Please.”
“Don’t worry Uchi,” Junno sighed and titled his head up to look at the brilliant stars, “This entire life of mine I’ve been led along… Onto the throne, into marriage… but only with him, can I make decisions on my own. I’ve made some pretty stupid ones, but the only one I know is right was falling in love with him. It’s in my royal duty to get married and father children but nothing can change my heart.”
“I’ll take your word it.”
“Just so you know, nothing can change his heart either so don’t you dare try and seduce him after I leave!” Junno warned.
“I don’t stand a chance.”
Not against you anyway.
The palace at night seemed an even more confusing maze of walls. Junno, still dressed in a white ladies’ kimono that matched the walls, was bidding a reluctant thanks to Uchi who had gotten him back inside the walls.
“YOU TWO ARE PREPOSTEROUS!!” a very angry Ueda stormed up behind them, “HOW EASY DO YOU THINK IT IS TO RUN BEHIND A HORSE IN PITCH BLACKNESS?! AND IT’S FREAKING COLD!!!!”
“How did you get here so fast?!” his lover nearly had a heart attack.
“Running you idiot!” the smaller man huffed, “Let’s just go to bed for the night… I’m so tired… my coronation is tomorrow too.”
“Why do I not know any of this?” Junno sighed and started throwing his hair ornaments to the ground. Bejewelled hair pins clattered everywhere.
“You don’t need to,” Uchi shrugged him off and wrapped a protective arm around Ueda’s shoulders, “let’s get you to bed Your Majesty.”
“HEY WHAT DO THINK YOU’RE-
Junno stopped his own sentence short. He had forgotten about the wedding in three days. The beautiful man in front of him, shimmering under the moonlight in a dark blue kimono will soon become his brother-in-law.
The adventures of the day had passed in a flurry of hooves and the dream was now over. Only the harsh reality remained on their shoulders… The wedding must proceed on pain of death.
Suddenly death didn’t seem like such a bad idea but Taguchi Junnosuke was not as so selfish as to forget about his friends who also depended on this wedding to leave Hokkaido alive. The whole façade was a death trap.
“Good night Your Majesty,” he bowed as Ueda sauntered away, not daring to look back.
A salty trail led away from a salty puddle on the palace paths.
Drip, drip.
“Kame don’t be ridiculous!” Jin shook the younger man by the shoulders for the millionth time, “I’m not going to make you go find them so can we just talk?! Let’s start with why you don’t want Tat-chan back.”
Kame pushed him back into a maple tree. “You can see right through me so why can’t you understand?! I don’t want either of them back!”
“Why-
“WHERE HAVE YOU TWO BEEN FOR THE PAST EIGHT HOURS?!” came Maru’s distraught hollering. “First you two leave then that Uchi guy leaves too… What’s wrong with you all?! Can we not just calm down?!”
“How are we supposed to be calm?!” Jin shot back, “Our lives depend on Junno’s forced wedding with the damn princess of Hokkaido, he’s gone God knows where with the KING and all while Kame here probably plotted it all for all I care!!”
“I DID NOT!!” Kame cried, outraged.
“THEN WHY DO YOU NOT WANT THEM BACK?!” Jin screamed, stress from the days all exploding.
“It’s too late anyway,” Maru pulled the two apart, “They’re back.”
Kame stilled for a moment in shock. “Where is Tat-chan?”
Ueda sat in his lavish wooden bathtub, watching the rose petals in the scented water float listlessly like drunk butterflies.
The dream is over. The coronation is tomorrow, and I will be Kimura Tatsuya.
Looking over at the jade flute on the side table, Ueda reached for the cold, oblong object and gripped it tightly.
I will finish what you started Takuya-san… I’m sorry for all the strife I caused you. This life of mine will be the repayment but I have to finish saving Junno first. He’s all I have left.
Pressing the cold tube to his wet, pink lips, Ueda was just about to blow when Kame dove through the paper window of his room - and landed right in his bathtub.
Half the water was already splashed onto the floor by the time Kame had finished spluttering, flailing his arms around trying not to drown in a bathtub while Ueda let loose of the foulest words he’s ever said. After all, it’s not every day that a man dives into your bathtub and ends up thrashing around so much that he punches you in the face, does not say sorry then proceeds to attempt to kick you in the nether regions with excessive force.
Thank goodness he missed the nether regions.
Recovering from the sheer shock of the ridiculous situation, Ueda grabbed Kame by the (soggy) waist and forcibly threw him out of the bathtub, onto the floor puddles.
“OOOWW!!!” Kame looked up at the completely naked Ueda accusingly, like he was in the wrong.
“So,” the very very naked Ueda got out of the bathtub and knelt over Kame, “can I have an explanation?”
The younger man immediately grabbed hold of Ueda’s neck and threw him to the floor instead, trapping the naked body under his wet one. Faces now half an inch within each other, Ueda could feel Kame’s hot breath on the tip of his nose.
“That was not an explanation. That was attempted rape,” he calmly told his bodyguard, “and I can’t breathe.”
“Why?” Kame panted.
“Because you’re strangling me.”
“WHY DID YOU COME BACK?!?! YOU COULD HAVE- SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT!!!!!” Kame was almost in tears.
“Because if I didn’t comeback, you, Jin and Ryo will never make it back to Kyoto. Now get your hands off my throat.”
“Tegoshi and Nakamaru are here too you know,” Kame’s hands didn’t move.
“That just adds to the number of people I need to save.”
“How can you say this all with an ice cold face?” he removed one hand to trace Ueda’s sleek jawline, “you’re throwing away your life…”
“I’m going to be a king. How bad can it be?”
Kame threw his head back and laughed. “Don’t fuck with me!” he let his head fall in the crook of Ueda’s neck to hide his tears, “He’s going to MARRY and will never see you again! Doesn’t that hurt you a bit?!”
“…Then can you stop rubbing salt into my wound?” Ueda limply put a hand on the back of Kame’s head and let him sob, “Thanks for everything you’ve done for me up till now Kame-chan…. But this is the road I chose and it’s not a pleasant one. I now free you from the bodyguard job. Just… leave me.”
“Please do,” came Maru’s voice from the doorway, “and get Tat-chan some clothes Kame!”
As if hit by an arrow, Kame sat bolt upright at the voice - only to see Maru and an incredibly pissed off Jin standing in the doorway.
“Kame,” an expressionless, butt-naked Ueda complained from under him, “you’re crushing my vital sex organs. Please get off.”
Jin’s left eye started to twitch, much like Maru’s. Maybe it was contagious.
A.N.... no matter where they go, these two always seem to get misunderstood ay? Last time in Osaka sucking out Kame's poison left them in a similar situation.
“If I came to you in fifty years, when I am no longer considered beautiful, will you still love me?”
“If you came to me in two thousand years, a completely different person who can’t even remember me from this life, I will still love you with the same feelings I stand here with today.”
So-called empty words have never made Ueda so happy in his life.
“I’ll take your word. Let’s go Junno,” Ueda sighed, “you have a wedding to attend to.”
The pair edged closer and closer to the palace, hand in hand, when Junno suddenly jerked his head up and stopped walking.
“What’s wrong?” Ueda’s quizzical eyes looked around for any singed of danger.
“Err Tat-chan,” Junno stared at him up and down, “you’re still wearing women’s clothes…”
His lover’s jaw dropped. Time seemed to stop for a completely different reason.
Crap… I was so lost in our moment I forgot I’m still dressed in drag! How am I supposed to walk up to the guards at the gate and demand to be let in if I look like a woman?!?!
“All your fault,” he muttered darkly to Junno, who had his head in his hands.
“But you were so pretty-
“Prettiness isn’t going to get us anywhere! It’s dark, we’re tired and I am not going back to Sapporo city to get a damn change of clothes Taguchi Junnosuke!!” Ueda paced around like a headless chicken. The pride of a king must be protected and one must not be seen in drag by ANYONE lest one become a laughing stock. Ueda knew that much being a man.
Hooves thundered in the distance, closer and closer.
Yelling also came closer and closer.
Closer still, until Ueda could make out a faint ‘both of you are so dead for escaping the palace and leaving us in a mess’.
It was definitely Uchi Hiroki. A very, very pissed and stressed out Uchi Hiroki.
“Umm Tat-chan?” Junno forced a smile, “I’m quite keen to run back to Sapporo to get you that change of clothes…”
“Oh no you don’t,” Ueda replied with mock seriousness, “remember what I said? If we die we die together.”
[Meanwhile, inside the Hokkaido palace]
“Are you finished crying?” Tegoshi stroked Ryo’s tear-stained face, “my leg is dead from your head resting on it…”
“…Sorry,” Ryo muttered and tried to move his head from Tegoshi’s lap.
“Nah it’s okay you big softie,” the cute man’s eyes grew warm, “I know you’ve been under stress lately. But crying on me for an entire day? Being in love with that cousin of mine really has taken a toll on you…”
“I WHAT?!” Ryo almost snapped his back jumping up with shock, “I AM NOT!!!!”
“It’s okay Ryo,” Tegoshi patted the wet stain on his lap calmly, “I can accept that. You know what? I used to hate him for causing you your injury on the wall and seriously wanted to kill you. But I can’t. When I see you, my heart melts to the ground and I can’t hurt you no matter how hard I fucking try I CAN’T STOP LOVING YOU SO I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY OKAY?!?!?!” the calmness had morphed into screaming tears that rivalled Ryo’s.
“Wait stop don’ cry oh my god Tesshi please don’t cry holy shit why are you crying please stop I’M NOT IN LOVE WITH TAT-CHAN!!!!!” was the only semi-coherent sentence Ryo managed to get out after seeing Tegoshi’s tears.
“You don’t have to make me feel better… He’s always had everyone’s hearts wrapped around his little finger. I know he’s beautiful, talented, dangerous, exciting and everything you like-
“He’s not you,” Ryo sighed.
It threw Tegoshi off-guard completely.
“Wha- MPH!” Not even one complete word made is out of his mouth before the pink lips were held captive in Ryo’s.
Both of them tasted salty.
Sensing no reaction from Tegoshi, Ryo daringly nibbled on his bottom lip. Deepening the kiss after Tegoshi granted him access, he ravished every corner of the cavern he had yearned for since long ago. Panting to catch a breath, he stared deeply into Tegoshi’s eyes and cupped the pretty cheeks in his hands weakly.
“I know what I use as excuses,” Ryo sighed, “but if there’s one thing that this ridiculous trip taught me, it’s how lucky we are to be by each other. I don’t give a fuck about being the head of a clan… When we get back, I’ll denounce my title immediately as head of the Nishikido family and get married to you!”
“But-
“Don’t argue with me!”
“…. Aren’t you in love with Tatsuya?” Tegoshi lowered his eyes when a look of outrage filled Ryo’s brimming eyes.
“You STILL think that?! I took an arrow for him, sure. But THAT was because I don’t want YOU to make a mistake you’ll regret for the rest of your life Tesshi!!”
“So you love…”
“YOU! YOU CUTE LITTLE DEVIL!!!” Ryo was exasperated at Tegoshi’s sudden dumbness.
The beautiful man went limp in his arms as soon as the words left his mouth. Hanging loosely off his forearms, Tegoshi remained still as rock.
“YUYA!!!!!”
[Outside the palace]
“YOU TWO ARE SOOO DEAD!!!” Uchi roared at his king and his king’s lover, giving Junno a solid smack over the head. “THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BE GOING WALKIES!!!”
“We’re sorry,” the pair said in unison and tried to fend off another smack.
“Now,” the man on horseback sighed, rubbing his temples, “why is my king in women’s dress?”
“Why are YOU blushing?!” Junno shot back, annoyed. He will never forget nor forgive what he saw outside their door that day, Ueda moaning and spreading his legs for this man. Just when he was clenching his fists, preparing to lash out, he felt a warm hand on his.
Ueda gave his lover a desperate look and shook his head.
Junno forcibly relaxed.
“We cannot have Ueda-sama entering the palace dressed in this…. Monstrosity,” Uchi failed in his bid to hide his own rapidly spreading blush. The truth could not have been further from what he just said. Ueda was absolutely breathtaking in the flowing white kimono.
“EXCUSE me?!” Junno’s jealousy flared again like a hungry flame, “I chose this MONSTROSITY thank you very much Uchi-san!”
“Junno!” Ueda hissed, “Stop it!”
Uchi coughed. “Well monstrosity or not, he is not going into the palace wearing it!”
“What do you expect ME to do about it?” Junno rolled his eyes.
[Later]
“Uchi-san…” Junno’s eyebrow twitched as he seriously considered throwing the man off his horse.
“What’s wrong Taguchi-sama?” Uchi smirked triumphantly, “you look stunning, I promise.”
“I look like a WOMAN,” the emperor of Honshu complained as Ueda stifled a giggle at him.
“Of course you do Junno!” Ueda was enjoying this, “It’s about time I got some revenge after being forced to cross-dress for so long! And your clothes are MUCH more comfortable than mine no?”
“Uchi-san! You can’t make me dress like this just to save the public image of YOUR king!!” Junno’s vigorous head-shaking was threatening to dislodge his hair accessories, “My clothes don’t even fit him that well!”
“I see no problem in doing this actually,” Uchi shrugged a little too gleefully, “let’s go!”
Grabbing Junno’s wrist, he pulled the tall man (dressed as a woman) onto his horse and told Ueda to follow.
Of course the horse walked significantly faster than Ueda, and the latter was trailing behind after a while.
Junno looked back every few seconds, worried. “Hey can I switch places with Tat-chan?” he begged Uchi, “I’ll walk and he can ride the horse with you pleeease?”
“No way!” Uchi shook his head, “it will look too suspicious having a lady walking behind a horse while two men ride it!”
The silence began to get uncomfortable between the two rivals. Both were contemplating whether it would be easier to just kill the other right there.
“Okay Taguchi-sama can I be honest with you?” Uchi finally sighed.
“As much as I don’t like you, can you drop the sama?” Junno rolled his eyes, “I’ve never had a taste for being superior…”
“Sure err, Junno?” Uchi tentatively called.
“How can I help you?” Junno rolled his eyes again.
“To be honest I don’t like you,” Uchi said quite bluntly to the young emperor.
“Gee thanks,” he huffed, “just because I’m in your country and dressed like a girl doesn’t mean you don’t have to respect me as Honshu’s ruler!”
“I really dislike you for other reasons… But Uepi loves you.”
“That’s none of your concern,” Junno blushed, “who he loves, I mean. And don’t call him by such an intimate name!”
Uchi ignored the taller man’s childish complaints.
“I want you to swear on your life that you love him too,” the general gave the horse a firm kick and brought it to a trot, leaving Ueda behind out of earshot.
“How does that bring you any advantage?” Junno was getting confused by all the dizzy bucking of the horse and Uchi’s words.
“It doesn’t. But I want you to promise that no matter how many women you may possess in your lifetime as an emperor, he will be the only one you love-
“I did that long ago for your information,” Junno cut him off, “but why are you doing this to yourself?!”
“Because Uepi is throwing away his entire lifetime to cater for your mistakes! He wouldn’t have to be king of a country he doesn’t even care for if it weren’t for you!! He has no family here, no experience, there are people just waiting for him to slip up then dispose of him!!! Yet he’s taking it all in his stride with no complaints because he knows it will save YOUR life-
“SHUT UP!!! THIS ISN’T MAKING ME FEEL ANY BETTER!!” Junno put two index fingers in his ears and tried to block out the guilt eating away at his very soul.
“IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO!! You WILL get married and you WILL get out of here alive and you owe Uepi undying love AT THE VERY LEAST!!” Uchi gritted his teeth, “it’s the least you can do… Please.”
“Don’t worry Uchi,” Junno sighed and titled his head up to look at the brilliant stars, “This entire life of mine I’ve been led along… Onto the throne, into marriage… but only with him, can I make decisions on my own. I’ve made some pretty stupid ones, but the only one I know is right was falling in love with him. It’s in my royal duty to get married and father children but nothing can change my heart.”
“I’ll take your word it.”
“Just so you know, nothing can change his heart either so don’t you dare try and seduce him after I leave!” Junno warned.
“I don’t stand a chance.”
Not against you anyway.
The palace at night seemed an even more confusing maze of walls. Junno, still dressed in a white ladies’ kimono that matched the walls, was bidding a reluctant thanks to Uchi who had gotten him back inside the walls.
“YOU TWO ARE PREPOSTEROUS!!” a very angry Ueda stormed up behind them, “HOW EASY DO YOU THINK IT IS TO RUN BEHIND A HORSE IN PITCH BLACKNESS?! AND IT’S FREAKING COLD!!!!”
“How did you get here so fast?!” his lover nearly had a heart attack.
“Running you idiot!” the smaller man huffed, “Let’s just go to bed for the night… I’m so tired… my coronation is tomorrow too.”
“Why do I not know any of this?” Junno sighed and started throwing his hair ornaments to the ground. Bejewelled hair pins clattered everywhere.
“You don’t need to,” Uchi shrugged him off and wrapped a protective arm around Ueda’s shoulders, “let’s get you to bed Your Majesty.”
“HEY WHAT DO THINK YOU’RE-
Junno stopped his own sentence short. He had forgotten about the wedding in three days. The beautiful man in front of him, shimmering under the moonlight in a dark blue kimono will soon become his brother-in-law.
The adventures of the day had passed in a flurry of hooves and the dream was now over. Only the harsh reality remained on their shoulders… The wedding must proceed on pain of death.
Suddenly death didn’t seem like such a bad idea but Taguchi Junnosuke was not as so selfish as to forget about his friends who also depended on this wedding to leave Hokkaido alive. The whole façade was a death trap.
“Good night Your Majesty,” he bowed as Ueda sauntered away, not daring to look back.
A salty trail led away from a salty puddle on the palace paths.
Drip, drip.
“Kame don’t be ridiculous!” Jin shook the younger man by the shoulders for the millionth time, “I’m not going to make you go find them so can we just talk?! Let’s start with why you don’t want Tat-chan back.”
Kame pushed him back into a maple tree. “You can see right through me so why can’t you understand?! I don’t want either of them back!”
“Why-
“WHERE HAVE YOU TWO BEEN FOR THE PAST EIGHT HOURS?!” came Maru’s distraught hollering. “First you two leave then that Uchi guy leaves too… What’s wrong with you all?! Can we not just calm down?!”
“How are we supposed to be calm?!” Jin shot back, “Our lives depend on Junno’s forced wedding with the damn princess of Hokkaido, he’s gone God knows where with the KING and all while Kame here probably plotted it all for all I care!!”
“I DID NOT!!” Kame cried, outraged.
“THEN WHY DO YOU NOT WANT THEM BACK?!” Jin screamed, stress from the days all exploding.
“It’s too late anyway,” Maru pulled the two apart, “They’re back.”
Kame stilled for a moment in shock. “Where is Tat-chan?”
Ueda sat in his lavish wooden bathtub, watching the rose petals in the scented water float listlessly like drunk butterflies.
The dream is over. The coronation is tomorrow, and I will be Kimura Tatsuya.
Looking over at the jade flute on the side table, Ueda reached for the cold, oblong object and gripped it tightly.
I will finish what you started Takuya-san… I’m sorry for all the strife I caused you. This life of mine will be the repayment but I have to finish saving Junno first. He’s all I have left.
Pressing the cold tube to his wet, pink lips, Ueda was just about to blow when Kame dove through the paper window of his room - and landed right in his bathtub.
Half the water was already splashed onto the floor by the time Kame had finished spluttering, flailing his arms around trying not to drown in a bathtub while Ueda let loose of the foulest words he’s ever said. After all, it’s not every day that a man dives into your bathtub and ends up thrashing around so much that he punches you in the face, does not say sorry then proceeds to attempt to kick you in the nether regions with excessive force.
Thank goodness he missed the nether regions.
Recovering from the sheer shock of the ridiculous situation, Ueda grabbed Kame by the (soggy) waist and forcibly threw him out of the bathtub, onto the floor puddles.
“OOOWW!!!” Kame looked up at the completely naked Ueda accusingly, like he was in the wrong.
“So,” the very very naked Ueda got out of the bathtub and knelt over Kame, “can I have an explanation?”
The younger man immediately grabbed hold of Ueda’s neck and threw him to the floor instead, trapping the naked body under his wet one. Faces now half an inch within each other, Ueda could feel Kame’s hot breath on the tip of his nose.
“That was not an explanation. That was attempted rape,” he calmly told his bodyguard, “and I can’t breathe.”
“Why?” Kame panted.
“Because you’re strangling me.”
“WHY DID YOU COME BACK?!?! YOU COULD HAVE- SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT!!!!!” Kame was almost in tears.
“Because if I didn’t comeback, you, Jin and Ryo will never make it back to Kyoto. Now get your hands off my throat.”
“Tegoshi and Nakamaru are here too you know,” Kame’s hands didn’t move.
“That just adds to the number of people I need to save.”
“How can you say this all with an ice cold face?” he removed one hand to trace Ueda’s sleek jawline, “you’re throwing away your life…”
“I’m going to be a king. How bad can it be?”
Kame threw his head back and laughed. “Don’t fuck with me!” he let his head fall in the crook of Ueda’s neck to hide his tears, “He’s going to MARRY and will never see you again! Doesn’t that hurt you a bit?!”
“…Then can you stop rubbing salt into my wound?” Ueda limply put a hand on the back of Kame’s head and let him sob, “Thanks for everything you’ve done for me up till now Kame-chan…. But this is the road I chose and it’s not a pleasant one. I now free you from the bodyguard job. Just… leave me.”
“Please do,” came Maru’s voice from the doorway, “and get Tat-chan some clothes Kame!”
As if hit by an arrow, Kame sat bolt upright at the voice - only to see Maru and an incredibly pissed off Jin standing in the doorway.
“Kame,” an expressionless, butt-naked Ueda complained from under him, “you’re crushing my vital sex organs. Please get off.”
Jin’s left eye started to twitch, much like Maru’s. Maybe it was contagious.
A.N.... no matter where they go, these two always seem to get misunderstood ay? Last time in Osaka sucking out Kame's poison left them in a similar situation.