apathy.
Today was the first day of my junior year at school. As expected, it fucking sucked. So much for 'having a good attitude' when all I get is shit thrown back in my face.
All I asked for was that I had lunch with SOMEONE. Anyone. And no, not even that. It seemed like someone took everyone that I hate/everyone that hates me and put them in all my classes. All of my classes require class presentation and group work and blah blah blah which is fucking ridiculous, considering all I wanna do is do my god damn work. I don't see why I can't just get a grade for being smart and quiet. Fuck this.
Lunch is just hell. I spent most of my day crying. I don't even know what to do. All my other friends have other lunches and people to sit with and I get no one. I don't even see how that's remotely fair. I work the HARDEST. I have the hardest classes. They just sit around and fucking goof off and get rewarded with friends and cool classes. Fuck that. Fuck. So pissed off. I at least think I deserve someone in my motherfucking LUNCH.
I'm not friggin going to bed early. Everyone else can fuck off. I'm going to talk to Miah like I do every night and keep my schedule. I don't care if I'm still nocturnal. I don't care. Miah is the only person who even fucking remotely gives a shit, and if I wanna stay up with him, then god damn it I will.
It fucking sucks that the one person I love more than anything is miles & miles away. I just wanna run away with him and never come back. Leave all these people and all this fucking constant bullshit. Its the first fucking day and I already know I'm going to be crying and freaking out like I did last year.
Fuck you all. All I need is Miah right now. One day this is gonna bite you all in the ass.
Good fucking luck.