My sad sad existence
You know... I think... that life... would be IMPOSSIBLE without hot guys... SO I'm wondering how I've been surviving so far...
I've been thinking and I think that I've figured out why I have no hot guy. I have incredibly HIGH standards:
What a guy I date HAS to have (in any order)
1. Intelligence- Come on, if you say hi and the dude just says "whoarwsfyou????" he looses his appeal!
2. He has to be at least attractive/eye-catching (in a good way)- Waking up to see his face in the morning has to relax you not destroy your day.
3. Money- Well okay, if he's really smart and incredibly ambitious he's bound to earn anyway.
4. Height- I will not bend down to kiss him on my wedding day!
5.Crazy, Irrevocable, unconditional love for me- I must be spoiled rotten. The loyalty comes along with this. By the way, I did not use the adjective undying because my dad ruined its meaning.
*Flashback*
Dad: *insert my mom's name*, I won't die for you.
Mom: WHY???
Dad: Because my love is undying, get it?
Me: *Slaps forehead at the idiocy*
*/Flashback*
6. Personal hygiene- NO EXPLANATION REQUIRED
7. Strong friendship with me- when the romance dies down something will be left. Also, if he's a good friend he can make you fall in love with him all over again.
8. Love for travelling- He shouldn't leave my side.
9. Good taste- Well, I assume he has that because he dated me, didn't he? I'm kidding.
10. Awesome parents- In-laws can be a pain (I can tell) unless you can't help but love them.
It may seem like a short list but you have to go on a quest to find a guy who has all these. And when you do, he's usually taken. Not that I'm saying that taken guys are all like this (waves to a friend).
Who needs marriage anyway? A husband will complain if we spend the whole day shopping. *pouts* Plus, you have to work on your relationship. Damn, I'm too lazy.
I've been thinking and I think that I've figured out why I have no hot guy. I have incredibly HIGH standards:
What a guy I date HAS to have (in any order)
1. Intelligence- Come on, if you say hi and the dude just says "whoarwsfyou????" he looses his appeal!
2. He has to be at least attractive/eye-catching (in a good way)- Waking up to see his face in the morning has to relax you not destroy your day.
3. Money- Well okay, if he's really smart and incredibly ambitious he's bound to earn anyway.
4. Height- I will not bend down to kiss him on my wedding day!
5.Crazy, Irrevocable, unconditional love for me- I must be spoiled rotten. The loyalty comes along with this. By the way, I did not use the adjective undying because my dad ruined its meaning.
*Flashback*
Dad: *insert my mom's name*, I won't die for you.
Mom: WHY???
Dad: Because my love is undying, get it?
Me: *Slaps forehead at the idiocy*
*/Flashback*
6. Personal hygiene- NO EXPLANATION REQUIRED
7. Strong friendship with me- when the romance dies down something will be left. Also, if he's a good friend he can make you fall in love with him all over again.
8. Love for travelling- He shouldn't leave my side.
9. Good taste- Well, I assume he has that because he dated me, didn't he? I'm kidding.
10. Awesome parents- In-laws can be a pain (I can tell) unless you can't help but love them.
It may seem like a short list but you have to go on a quest to find a guy who has all these. And when you do, he's usually taken. Not that I'm saying that taken guys are all like this (waves to a friend).
Who needs marriage anyway? A husband will complain if we spend the whole day shopping. *pouts* Plus, you have to work on your relationship. Damn, I'm too lazy.