c + j 4 eva
The last time Cameron was gone for a weekend, he came back more loving than normal, and was definitely a little different, he appreciated me more since for the majority of this relationship, we see each other a lot and that was our first weekend while dating without each other.
Cameron called me tonight while he’s out doing that thing he does that I cannot talk about due to opsec but it was so nice to hear his voice, I have been answering the phones for days waiting for him to call since i know he isn’t supposed to use his cell but can call me from a line so I have been waiting and he called.
It’s always so nice to hear his voice. In person, it’s a million times hotter, but on the phone, it’s still pretty good. I told him what is up in my life since Monday, he comes back at the end of this week, so he’ll be back before our anniversary, which I’m excited about.
We might go to a car show before we go to dinner because we love to watch races so it’s something special we can do together.
I don’t know, I think we kind of fell in love all over again the last time he was gone, because I noticed that we fight very little, if not at all, and we don’t have fights, we have spats and then we make up.
And he definitely has convinced me he’s here for good. I am a pessimist about relationships since I’ve had my fair share of catastrophic failures but after month 8, my impending doom went away because we have been through a lot together and are still just as loving as when we first started dating and I didn’t really ever thing I’d be happy like I am. It’s really nice, sometimes we get stressed about money, and other nonsense, but overall we handle ourselves really well.
I made a comment about something I did, and I said it’s my life I can do whatever. And he said "I am always thinking with us in mind and make choices based on what’s good for us."
For some reason, that really grabbed my heartstrings and what pretty much put me at ease.
Us.
I still get giddy over him doing cute things, I still get giddy over "us".
This is my second longest relationship, and by August, it’ll be my longest relationship. This is Cameron’s longest relationship.
Anyways, today I was looking at wedding cakes and dresses and shit. Cameron and I made a deal that when he makes Staff Sergeant, we can get married.
I agreed with this because when he hits staff, he’ll be making bank, and I should be making bank at my job.
So, that’s exciting, it feels far away, but it’s really not. If a year could go by fast, what is 2 years?
I don’t know, it’s not to have confidence in another person. I’ve never really fully trusted anyone, and not as far as cheating, but trusted with sharing my life with someone because last time i tried to share my life with someone, well that went to shit and since then i hadn’t really repaired, and then after the whole Zack debacle, it didn’t really help.
It’s just kind of funny because I need him. Like, not monetary or anything like that, we just can’t really see our lives without each other in it anymore and honestly wouldn’t want to.
I don’t really think I’ve known what it’s like to really need someone before. Like, to need him but not be dependent. I think when it comes to my past relationships, I was dependent, and I kind of feel like they enabled my dependence on other people because it was away to keep me.
Then, after the whole Zack thing, I needed to establish my own identity and my own life and got a job i really liked (til i got laid off) and then found the job i chose for a career and then I met Cameron after going through some motions and Cameron has always encouraged my independence.
He has always encouraged my choices and gave me his opinion and had my back even if he wasn’t sure about my choices.
We make choices about finances together, we generally make all our choices together because we know that whatever each other does, affects OUR live.
I think that’s a big sign of growing up. We make like to go out and party, but when it comes to our work and our future together, we definitely do things as a team and it’s a really wonderful thing.
My dad likes to call Cam, "son in law" and my sister calls cam her future brother.
I enjoy that my family loves Cameron and that he’s treated like a member of the family, and that he’s gone on family trips with us and other things. I am most of all happy that my father approves of Cameron, because if my father doesn’t like anyone i date, he makes it awfully clear.
I think it’s because Cameron and my dad both work with their hands, they’re very mechanical people, and they both have done physical work.
Cameron isn’t a pretty boy. He’s not a rich bitch. He has worked very hard, which is the main thing i love about him. He keeps me leveled, and reminds me that things aren’t so bad when I feel like they are fucking horrible. He is my optimist.
I usually don’t like to give into cliche things, but i really feel like he’s that one for me.
In past relationships, either they loved me, and i didn’t love them, or i loved them and they didn’t love me, or one of us was happy and the other wasn’t and I didn’t know, or vice versa and for ONCE
ONCE
We are both happy.
And we communicate when things piss each other off and we resolve them.
If one of us is sad,
we cheer each other.
We have balance.
We balance each other out incredibly.
I could go on and on forever about how much I love Cameron but my tooth hurts and I need to sleep.
I am so happy to have my car fixed as early as next week. How I’ve missed these, and it will be good that we’ll have two vehicles again instead of going back and forth with one.
And my car is WAY better on gas,
Cameron called me tonight while he’s out doing that thing he does that I cannot talk about due to opsec but it was so nice to hear his voice, I have been answering the phones for days waiting for him to call since i know he isn’t supposed to use his cell but can call me from a line so I have been waiting and he called.
It’s always so nice to hear his voice. In person, it’s a million times hotter, but on the phone, it’s still pretty good. I told him what is up in my life since Monday, he comes back at the end of this week, so he’ll be back before our anniversary, which I’m excited about.
We might go to a car show before we go to dinner because we love to watch races so it’s something special we can do together.
I don’t know, I think we kind of fell in love all over again the last time he was gone, because I noticed that we fight very little, if not at all, and we don’t have fights, we have spats and then we make up.
And he definitely has convinced me he’s here for good. I am a pessimist about relationships since I’ve had my fair share of catastrophic failures but after month 8, my impending doom went away because we have been through a lot together and are still just as loving as when we first started dating and I didn’t really ever thing I’d be happy like I am. It’s really nice, sometimes we get stressed about money, and other nonsense, but overall we handle ourselves really well.
I made a comment about something I did, and I said it’s my life I can do whatever. And he said "I am always thinking with us in mind and make choices based on what’s good for us."
For some reason, that really grabbed my heartstrings and what pretty much put me at ease.
Us.
I still get giddy over him doing cute things, I still get giddy over "us".
This is my second longest relationship, and by August, it’ll be my longest relationship. This is Cameron’s longest relationship.
Anyways, today I was looking at wedding cakes and dresses and shit. Cameron and I made a deal that when he makes Staff Sergeant, we can get married.
I agreed with this because when he hits staff, he’ll be making bank, and I should be making bank at my job.
So, that’s exciting, it feels far away, but it’s really not. If a year could go by fast, what is 2 years?
I don’t know, it’s not to have confidence in another person. I’ve never really fully trusted anyone, and not as far as cheating, but trusted with sharing my life with someone because last time i tried to share my life with someone, well that went to shit and since then i hadn’t really repaired, and then after the whole Zack debacle, it didn’t really help.
It’s just kind of funny because I need him. Like, not monetary or anything like that, we just can’t really see our lives without each other in it anymore and honestly wouldn’t want to.
I don’t really think I’ve known what it’s like to really need someone before. Like, to need him but not be dependent. I think when it comes to my past relationships, I was dependent, and I kind of feel like they enabled my dependence on other people because it was away to keep me.
Then, after the whole Zack thing, I needed to establish my own identity and my own life and got a job i really liked (til i got laid off) and then found the job i chose for a career and then I met Cameron after going through some motions and Cameron has always encouraged my independence.
He has always encouraged my choices and gave me his opinion and had my back even if he wasn’t sure about my choices.
We make choices about finances together, we generally make all our choices together because we know that whatever each other does, affects OUR live.
I think that’s a big sign of growing up. We make like to go out and party, but when it comes to our work and our future together, we definitely do things as a team and it’s a really wonderful thing.
My dad likes to call Cam, "son in law" and my sister calls cam her future brother.
I enjoy that my family loves Cameron and that he’s treated like a member of the family, and that he’s gone on family trips with us and other things. I am most of all happy that my father approves of Cameron, because if my father doesn’t like anyone i date, he makes it awfully clear.
I think it’s because Cameron and my dad both work with their hands, they’re very mechanical people, and they both have done physical work.
Cameron isn’t a pretty boy. He’s not a rich bitch. He has worked very hard, which is the main thing i love about him. He keeps me leveled, and reminds me that things aren’t so bad when I feel like they are fucking horrible. He is my optimist.
I usually don’t like to give into cliche things, but i really feel like he’s that one for me.
In past relationships, either they loved me, and i didn’t love them, or i loved them and they didn’t love me, or one of us was happy and the other wasn’t and I didn’t know, or vice versa and for ONCE
ONCE
We are both happy.
And we communicate when things piss each other off and we resolve them.
If one of us is sad,
we cheer each other.
We have balance.
We balance each other out incredibly.
I could go on and on forever about how much I love Cameron but my tooth hurts and I need to sleep.
I am so happy to have my car fixed as early as next week. How I’ve missed these, and it will be good that we’ll have two vehicles again instead of going back and forth with one.
And my car is WAY better on gas,