how many days disappear?
Hey LJ,
It's like middle school all over again
God damn, I've been up to so much this past month.
Halloweeeeen!!
The Halloween celebrations and events were spread out over a few days this year. Most notably, fruit_smoothie and alucardkitty threw a Victorian-style All Hallow's gathering at their place on Halloween night. I showed up a bit early and helped them finish the party preparations: shelling eggs, lighting candles, that kind of thing. If there were Jewish Mother Olympics, I'm sure that fruit_smoothie would be worthy of some kind of medal based on the sheer amount of food she prepared.
Before the party began in full force, I spent some time with their room mate and their other friend (who I will refer to hereafter as Geek Girl), who were watching old German horror films. The alcohol was already flowing, and I joined in using my best worst German accents to narrate the captions, ya. alucardkitty was dressed as a werewolf and her room mate was dressed as a princess, so we did a cute little photo shoot afterwards.
I had my famous never-been-worn steampunk costume I bought a few months back. It was intended for the Green Steam Festival and had been languishing in my closet for some time. I decided to wear it, eschewing the black velvet kung-fu costume top which now fits me like a glove. The decision was in part owing to the absence of a pair of black velvet bottoms which also fit me. Goggles and a necklace on made out of railroad nails completed the costume.
During the evening, we played some traditional olde-tyme All Hallow's games. For one, we bobbed for apples, which is much more difficult than I think any of us expected. I had to basically push my apple all the way to the bottom of the pail before I could get my teeth into it, and it sort of felt like I was drowning. I guess that's the point. There was also this cool game called Snapdragon. fractallia and I discovered it while watching the Poirot Halloween movie. In it, players try to pluck prunes out of a pool of burning brandy. It burned blue and looked very occult in the dim room, and those not playing were reading a creepy poem. It was a scary looking situation, but the prunes were only slightly warm when they were plucked, and tasted very sweet. In some cases, blue flames clung to the prune as it passed from bowl to mouth. We had difficulty getting the brandy to burn at first. It was supposed to be warmed (ostensibly to cause some of the alcohol to evaporate), but we forgot to do it. In frustration, we used Uzo for the first go-round, and the first few prunes we ate tasted like licorice. It was a bit disgusting, but we figured it out eventually.
fractallia and I went downtown for the Halloween parade the day before. It was kind of low-key when we arrived and picked up steam the more drinks we had. There weren't really as many phenomenal costumes as I remember there being in past years (grumble, grumble). The coolest one for me was a cool little 12-foot tall brass walking-apparatus. It looked like it should have had a gorilla skin or something draped over it. We counted the costumes. Waldo was the big winner with seven, Lady Gaga followed up with 4, and Jesus was a distant third with 3.
We also watched a few horror movies during the week. The Host is the most badass Korean horror movie in the universe. You need to watch it. fractallia also acquired an odd japanese movie called Hausu. It was about seven school girls spending their summer vacation in an old house with one of the girl's aunts. They had weird names like Fantasy, Kung-Fu, Angel and Mac. During a scene on the way to the scary murder house, they each walked through the frame sounding off their names, and I decided that from now on every single horror movie needs to include a victim role-call. It should be a law or something.
Other Stuff
There are a few more thing to mention, so here's a synopsis:
1. I went to a cozy wine drinking party and tasted a red wine I kind of liked.
2. I went out for yogurt with the lesbians and played charades.
3. I saw Harry Potter 7 with a group. I haven't yet seem numbers 5 and 6.
4. I went on a very nice date to Spider House. It was fun, but I'm not sure it will progress to romance.
5. Hung out and played Doctor Mario for a long while with a cute girl. Where are all my gamers at?
6. Watched fire spinners at Spider House. There was a cuuuuute chubby redhead with peppermint arm warmers spinning to this tune. It couldn't have been better.
New Romance
At fruit_smoothie and alucardkitty's party, I hooked up with the aforementioned Geek Girl. She and I have been seeing each other ever since and it has been wonderful. I think our senses of humor work well with each other. It's a bit of an odd situation for me since she didn't have a primary partner prior to going out with me, nor had she ever been in a poly-style relationship either. I can tell it has been a learning experience for us both. Balancing the time between her and fractallia has been a little difficult, as well. For all the poly people out there, is it easier to balance schedules with 3 partners or 4? Based on what I'm learning, I almost think the higher number would be easier.
I went with fractallia and Geek Girl to the Celtic Festival. That was the first time I had been someplace with them both at the same time. I was nervous about how things would work out, but it turned out to be a very easy situation. I felt like I spent just enough time with everyone and had plenty left over for myself. I also learned a whole lot about kilts and bought an amazing steampunk poly necklace from knighthorse and kulilinei. Once I reach my weight loss goals, I'm going to buy myself a kilt, and I also wanted to have one to participate as a groomsman at alucardkitty and fruit_smoothie's wedding. Towards the end of our visit, we saw a Celtic dance troupe doing that sort of Riverdance style dancing. The women in the group had incredibly curly hair, and we spent a lot of time trying to figure out if they were wigs, or if they were really just that dedicated to the premise.
I went with Geek Girl to Comic-Con a few weekends later. It was my first comic-con, and not being a comic geek, I didn't really feel like there was much for me there. We sat in on panels by the dude who played Lando in Star Wars and the guy who played Chekov in Star Trek. Big stars. This convention was very odd to me, since in addition to the normal dealer tables that I expected, celebrities were also in attendance at their own booths. Stars from sci-fi shows, the WWE, etc, were sitting there waiting for people to come around, take pictures with them, get autographs and the other things that people do with celebrities. So, that was kind of odd. I kept running into poly people and people from work there, so it was kind of cool. At this point in time, Geek Girl had never met any of my friends, so I'm sure that I looked like I was a total social slut.
Name Change
I went with fractallia downtown to get her name changed. We were a bit late leaving and didn't realize until later that the court is only in session for 50 minutes twice a day. We missed the morning session, spent some time walking around downtown, and fractallia treated me to Fogo de Chao. It's a Brazilian Grill where people walk around and slice the meat for you at your table. They had a scrumptious salad bar that included sliced salmon, delicious salad medleys and cheeses. We tried most of the things on the menu, and I have to say my favorite was the parmesan pork.
Afterwards, her papers gathered, fractallia's day in court came. We had a lot of waiting to do even though it was a no-contest court. I thought we had arrived early, but despite that, she wasn't called up until close to the end of our 50 minutes. I wasn't keeping a tally, but I can distinctly remember two marriage licences and about 12 or 15 divorces. The judge was good natured about the entire thing; he tried to put a positive spin on things despite whatever was happening. "I'm happy you two were able to work it out." "I'm glad you're putting your children first," etc. It kind of got depressing after a while. Maybe that's why he only works an hour and 40 minutes per day. When we entered the room, there was a couple sitting there. Picture a man, slightly overweight, slayer t-shirt, tattoos up and down his arms and neck. Next to him sits a hard-faced scrawny woman in a suit-dress holding a binder of papers. She sits upright, he slouches in the pew. If you were you, what would you say their relationship was? fractallia and I were both sure she was his lawyer. But I guess the law of averages wins again, because they were getting a divorce. When fractallia's turn came, the judge signed the paper and sent her off. It took all of 10 seconds. We went to Fado afterwards and had some Guinesses.
That was Monday and fractallia threw her Identity Party that Friday to celebrate being who we all are. We spent time composing an appropriate playlist, gathering cool music videos, buying carby, carby food, making punch and re-arranging her apartment to be more accommodating. The party was a super great success! A bunch of people showed up but it didn't feel too crowded, fractallia had to refresh her Hurricane punch three times, and there were several points where people were ogling my sexy, sexy body. That was actually very very embarrassing and stole whatever words I would have had in that kind of situation. That was also the first time Geek Girl met any of my poly friends and I was super happy that she seemed to get along with them and that you all seemed to like her. There might have even been flirting happening.
More Dreams
I've had a few more weird dreams this month. I don't remember many of them, and the ones I do remember seem to be very subtle with whatever meaning they may have.
The first one I can remember involved me travelling back to the past to avert some kind of who-knows-what. Pretty standard sci-fi premise. This one also seemed to hold to a different sci-fi convention which states that the universe doesn't like being fucked with, and that time travel will never be able to alter the events of the past. I guess it's kind of a comforting idea. Anyway, despite all of the different things I did in the past to avert who-knows-what, it still ended up occurring. It happened this way: some random person who happened to be close by went from being a super-nice-mild-mannered-dude to lets-all-enjoy-a-refreshing-killing-spree in a matter of moments. It was someone completely unrelated to the events at hand, and someone who I had never even met. It's a very fatalistic situation, but I was really curious to know why people from the future hadn't figured out that time travel couldn't change the past. Maybe I was simply the first ever time traveller.
The second dream involved angry cats. Don't ask me why. There were three little white cats who seemed unhappy to see me and they were draped with shiny bead dresses and were wearing these glued-on feather head dresses. They were still just cats, so I didn't have any trouble peeling the head dresses off of them. If a cat could look peeved off, I guess I saw what that would look like in my dream. Afterwards, I went all around the world finding and de-activating their secret homing devices. My travels took me a number of places including a spring campout for vikings, and everywhere I went, I was relatively unnoticed, the same way a cat or other small animal might be.
Weight Loss
Weight loss is going very well. At the time of this writing, I'm down to around 146. It's sort of funny to watch the graph of my weight over the past few months. The way the Wii keeps track of things, there is a red dot every day your weight increases by over a pound. If I go back and track the dots, I can associate each one with a party. It's kind of funny.
I'm having to scramble to get new clothes that fit me. Even the pants I have with elastic bands are beginning to fall off of me.
I wonder how my friends would feel in this situation: there is a person who would not date you at a heavy size. After you lose weight, they become interested. How would that make you feel? Would you consider going out with said person? Would you be upset? Not care?
What if it was someone who you just met? They would not have dated you at your bigger size, but are attracted at the smaller one. The odd thing is that you might not know how they would have felt had they met you earlier. What do you think you would do?
Random Thoughts
When is the last time you got ASL'd?
USSR.. USS R What? The USS R well red.
I'm aware that there is such a thing as an unnecessary crotch shot. But does that mean that there are also necessary crotch shots?
Would a British Terminator's teeth fall out?
I gave up dryer sheets for lint.
There need to be more safer sex musicians - we can call them Condom Rappers.
When I get rich and famous, I want my limo driver to be named Stephan so I can say "Stephan it!"
Would a culinary school have an Omspudsman?
If I made a computer database with museum artifacts, could I make Relicqueries with it?
I think we should make a horror movie involving motorcycles and those ridiculous pedal bikes with the huge wheel in the front. We can call it "Vicious Cycle".
At what point would you consider someone an "older man". At five years? One year? One day?
I'm not sure if radio stations do this or not, but they could try to one-up each other by anticipating the others' song lists and playing the same songs slightly ahead of time.
If you drink eggnog and kiss someone is that an eggsnog?
As far as sexual orientation is concerned, if you had a bisexual individual dating a person of the same sex vs. a bisexual individual dating a mixed-sex couple, would you consider those two individuals as having different sexual orientations?
If someone has Cerberus as a pet in their apartment, does that count as one dog or three?
L.L. Cool Beans could be a Mexican Rapper.
Pretend like you drink too much of the trans-substantiated blood of Christ and then throw it up. Would that be bad?
I can do quite a number of things with no handlebars.
The Postal Service is a mail dominated industry.
We need a better word for Old Relationship Energy. Some ideas: Developed Relationship Energy, Trusting Relationship Energy, Mature Relationship Energy, Seasoned Relationship Energy, Enduring Relationship Energy, Familiar Relationship Energy, Solid Relationship Energy, Steady Relationship Energy, Lasting Relationship Energy, Refined Relationship Energy. Mature, Enduring and Seasoned are my favorite alternatives.
Imagine a scenario where you had a poly triad - a guy, a girl and a third, all bisexuals. Now imagine a scenario where the first two get married. It occurred to me that the third person has the potential to give one of the most memorable wedding speeches in history.
Afros are imported from Afroca.
Spooning is the little sex position that could.
Does penor butter come out of a penis?
Fursuits are a fashion faux paws.
If you're going to court downtown and you're being tried for a crime, do you still have to pay to park?
If you're a tall person dating a short person, you can have a standing O every day.
Is cheap, healthy food gastroeconomical?
Do you think some handicapped people sleep wheel?
I want to make a line of condoms based off of super heroes. We could have one be the Juggernaut, bitch.
There are plenty of touchy subjects out there, and if someone has their heart in the right place, does it make a lot of sense to get caught up in semantics? If someone is too insistent upon a certain way of speaking about something, doesn't that person risk alienating others, even those that would agree or be sympathetic?
Just like guys have testosterone, I think women should have breastosterone.
What kinds of sex positions would go in the Karma Sutra?
Did Evil Kinevil get married in the Evil Cathedral?
I know nuns can get married to the lord, but if a priest does it, is it gay marriage?
Dr. Mario is a much funnier game if you think of him as a breast augmentation doctor.
Carbuncle is a really cute name.
It's like middle school all over again
God damn, I've been up to so much this past month.
Halloweeeeen!!
The Halloween celebrations and events were spread out over a few days this year. Most notably, fruit_smoothie and alucardkitty threw a Victorian-style All Hallow's gathering at their place on Halloween night. I showed up a bit early and helped them finish the party preparations: shelling eggs, lighting candles, that kind of thing. If there were Jewish Mother Olympics, I'm sure that fruit_smoothie would be worthy of some kind of medal based on the sheer amount of food she prepared.
Before the party began in full force, I spent some time with their room mate and their other friend (who I will refer to hereafter as Geek Girl), who were watching old German horror films. The alcohol was already flowing, and I joined in using my best worst German accents to narrate the captions, ya. alucardkitty was dressed as a werewolf and her room mate was dressed as a princess, so we did a cute little photo shoot afterwards.
I had my famous never-been-worn steampunk costume I bought a few months back. It was intended for the Green Steam Festival and had been languishing in my closet for some time. I decided to wear it, eschewing the black velvet kung-fu costume top which now fits me like a glove. The decision was in part owing to the absence of a pair of black velvet bottoms which also fit me. Goggles and a necklace on made out of railroad nails completed the costume.
During the evening, we played some traditional olde-tyme All Hallow's games. For one, we bobbed for apples, which is much more difficult than I think any of us expected. I had to basically push my apple all the way to the bottom of the pail before I could get my teeth into it, and it sort of felt like I was drowning. I guess that's the point. There was also this cool game called Snapdragon. fractallia and I discovered it while watching the Poirot Halloween movie. In it, players try to pluck prunes out of a pool of burning brandy. It burned blue and looked very occult in the dim room, and those not playing were reading a creepy poem. It was a scary looking situation, but the prunes were only slightly warm when they were plucked, and tasted very sweet. In some cases, blue flames clung to the prune as it passed from bowl to mouth. We had difficulty getting the brandy to burn at first. It was supposed to be warmed (ostensibly to cause some of the alcohol to evaporate), but we forgot to do it. In frustration, we used Uzo for the first go-round, and the first few prunes we ate tasted like licorice. It was a bit disgusting, but we figured it out eventually.
fractallia and I went downtown for the Halloween parade the day before. It was kind of low-key when we arrived and picked up steam the more drinks we had. There weren't really as many phenomenal costumes as I remember there being in past years (grumble, grumble). The coolest one for me was a cool little 12-foot tall brass walking-apparatus. It looked like it should have had a gorilla skin or something draped over it. We counted the costumes. Waldo was the big winner with seven, Lady Gaga followed up with 4, and Jesus was a distant third with 3.
We also watched a few horror movies during the week. The Host is the most badass Korean horror movie in the universe. You need to watch it. fractallia also acquired an odd japanese movie called Hausu. It was about seven school girls spending their summer vacation in an old house with one of the girl's aunts. They had weird names like Fantasy, Kung-Fu, Angel and Mac. During a scene on the way to the scary murder house, they each walked through the frame sounding off their names, and I decided that from now on every single horror movie needs to include a victim role-call. It should be a law or something.
Other Stuff
There are a few more thing to mention, so here's a synopsis:
1. I went to a cozy wine drinking party and tasted a red wine I kind of liked.
2. I went out for yogurt with the lesbians and played charades.
3. I saw Harry Potter 7 with a group. I haven't yet seem numbers 5 and 6.
4. I went on a very nice date to Spider House. It was fun, but I'm not sure it will progress to romance.
5. Hung out and played Doctor Mario for a long while with a cute girl. Where are all my gamers at?
6. Watched fire spinners at Spider House. There was a cuuuuute chubby redhead with peppermint arm warmers spinning to this tune. It couldn't have been better.
New Romance
At fruit_smoothie and alucardkitty's party, I hooked up with the aforementioned Geek Girl. She and I have been seeing each other ever since and it has been wonderful. I think our senses of humor work well with each other. It's a bit of an odd situation for me since she didn't have a primary partner prior to going out with me, nor had she ever been in a poly-style relationship either. I can tell it has been a learning experience for us both. Balancing the time between her and fractallia has been a little difficult, as well. For all the poly people out there, is it easier to balance schedules with 3 partners or 4? Based on what I'm learning, I almost think the higher number would be easier.
I went with fractallia and Geek Girl to the Celtic Festival. That was the first time I had been someplace with them both at the same time. I was nervous about how things would work out, but it turned out to be a very easy situation. I felt like I spent just enough time with everyone and had plenty left over for myself. I also learned a whole lot about kilts and bought an amazing steampunk poly necklace from knighthorse and kulilinei. Once I reach my weight loss goals, I'm going to buy myself a kilt, and I also wanted to have one to participate as a groomsman at alucardkitty and fruit_smoothie's wedding. Towards the end of our visit, we saw a Celtic dance troupe doing that sort of Riverdance style dancing. The women in the group had incredibly curly hair, and we spent a lot of time trying to figure out if they were wigs, or if they were really just that dedicated to the premise.
I went with Geek Girl to Comic-Con a few weekends later. It was my first comic-con, and not being a comic geek, I didn't really feel like there was much for me there. We sat in on panels by the dude who played Lando in Star Wars and the guy who played Chekov in Star Trek. Big stars. This convention was very odd to me, since in addition to the normal dealer tables that I expected, celebrities were also in attendance at their own booths. Stars from sci-fi shows, the WWE, etc, were sitting there waiting for people to come around, take pictures with them, get autographs and the other things that people do with celebrities. So, that was kind of odd. I kept running into poly people and people from work there, so it was kind of cool. At this point in time, Geek Girl had never met any of my friends, so I'm sure that I looked like I was a total social slut.
Name Change
I went with fractallia downtown to get her name changed. We were a bit late leaving and didn't realize until later that the court is only in session for 50 minutes twice a day. We missed the morning session, spent some time walking around downtown, and fractallia treated me to Fogo de Chao. It's a Brazilian Grill where people walk around and slice the meat for you at your table. They had a scrumptious salad bar that included sliced salmon, delicious salad medleys and cheeses. We tried most of the things on the menu, and I have to say my favorite was the parmesan pork.
Afterwards, her papers gathered, fractallia's day in court came. We had a lot of waiting to do even though it was a no-contest court. I thought we had arrived early, but despite that, she wasn't called up until close to the end of our 50 minutes. I wasn't keeping a tally, but I can distinctly remember two marriage licences and about 12 or 15 divorces. The judge was good natured about the entire thing; he tried to put a positive spin on things despite whatever was happening. "I'm happy you two were able to work it out." "I'm glad you're putting your children first," etc. It kind of got depressing after a while. Maybe that's why he only works an hour and 40 minutes per day. When we entered the room, there was a couple sitting there. Picture a man, slightly overweight, slayer t-shirt, tattoos up and down his arms and neck. Next to him sits a hard-faced scrawny woman in a suit-dress holding a binder of papers. She sits upright, he slouches in the pew. If you were you, what would you say their relationship was? fractallia and I were both sure she was his lawyer. But I guess the law of averages wins again, because they were getting a divorce. When fractallia's turn came, the judge signed the paper and sent her off. It took all of 10 seconds. We went to Fado afterwards and had some Guinesses.
That was Monday and fractallia threw her Identity Party that Friday to celebrate being who we all are. We spent time composing an appropriate playlist, gathering cool music videos, buying carby, carby food, making punch and re-arranging her apartment to be more accommodating. The party was a super great success! A bunch of people showed up but it didn't feel too crowded, fractallia had to refresh her Hurricane punch three times, and there were several points where people were ogling my sexy, sexy body. That was actually very very embarrassing and stole whatever words I would have had in that kind of situation. That was also the first time Geek Girl met any of my poly friends and I was super happy that she seemed to get along with them and that you all seemed to like her. There might have even been flirting happening.
More Dreams
I've had a few more weird dreams this month. I don't remember many of them, and the ones I do remember seem to be very subtle with whatever meaning they may have.
The first one I can remember involved me travelling back to the past to avert some kind of who-knows-what. Pretty standard sci-fi premise. This one also seemed to hold to a different sci-fi convention which states that the universe doesn't like being fucked with, and that time travel will never be able to alter the events of the past. I guess it's kind of a comforting idea. Anyway, despite all of the different things I did in the past to avert who-knows-what, it still ended up occurring. It happened this way: some random person who happened to be close by went from being a super-nice-mild-mannered-dude to lets-all-enjoy-a-refreshing-killing-spree in a matter of moments. It was someone completely unrelated to the events at hand, and someone who I had never even met. It's a very fatalistic situation, but I was really curious to know why people from the future hadn't figured out that time travel couldn't change the past. Maybe I was simply the first ever time traveller.
The second dream involved angry cats. Don't ask me why. There were three little white cats who seemed unhappy to see me and they were draped with shiny bead dresses and were wearing these glued-on feather head dresses. They were still just cats, so I didn't have any trouble peeling the head dresses off of them. If a cat could look peeved off, I guess I saw what that would look like in my dream. Afterwards, I went all around the world finding and de-activating their secret homing devices. My travels took me a number of places including a spring campout for vikings, and everywhere I went, I was relatively unnoticed, the same way a cat or other small animal might be.
Weight Loss
Weight loss is going very well. At the time of this writing, I'm down to around 146. It's sort of funny to watch the graph of my weight over the past few months. The way the Wii keeps track of things, there is a red dot every day your weight increases by over a pound. If I go back and track the dots, I can associate each one with a party. It's kind of funny.
I'm having to scramble to get new clothes that fit me. Even the pants I have with elastic bands are beginning to fall off of me.
I wonder how my friends would feel in this situation: there is a person who would not date you at a heavy size. After you lose weight, they become interested. How would that make you feel? Would you consider going out with said person? Would you be upset? Not care?
What if it was someone who you just met? They would not have dated you at your bigger size, but are attracted at the smaller one. The odd thing is that you might not know how they would have felt had they met you earlier. What do you think you would do?
Random Thoughts
When is the last time you got ASL'd?
USSR.. USS R What? The USS R well red.
I'm aware that there is such a thing as an unnecessary crotch shot. But does that mean that there are also necessary crotch shots?
Would a British Terminator's teeth fall out?
I gave up dryer sheets for lint.
There need to be more safer sex musicians - we can call them Condom Rappers.
When I get rich and famous, I want my limo driver to be named Stephan so I can say "Stephan it!"
Would a culinary school have an Omspudsman?
If I made a computer database with museum artifacts, could I make Relicqueries with it?
I think we should make a horror movie involving motorcycles and those ridiculous pedal bikes with the huge wheel in the front. We can call it "Vicious Cycle".
At what point would you consider someone an "older man". At five years? One year? One day?
I'm not sure if radio stations do this or not, but they could try to one-up each other by anticipating the others' song lists and playing the same songs slightly ahead of time.
If you drink eggnog and kiss someone is that an eggsnog?
As far as sexual orientation is concerned, if you had a bisexual individual dating a person of the same sex vs. a bisexual individual dating a mixed-sex couple, would you consider those two individuals as having different sexual orientations?
If someone has Cerberus as a pet in their apartment, does that count as one dog or three?
L.L. Cool Beans could be a Mexican Rapper.
Pretend like you drink too much of the trans-substantiated blood of Christ and then throw it up. Would that be bad?
I can do quite a number of things with no handlebars.
The Postal Service is a mail dominated industry.
We need a better word for Old Relationship Energy. Some ideas: Developed Relationship Energy, Trusting Relationship Energy, Mature Relationship Energy, Seasoned Relationship Energy, Enduring Relationship Energy, Familiar Relationship Energy, Solid Relationship Energy, Steady Relationship Energy, Lasting Relationship Energy, Refined Relationship Energy. Mature, Enduring and Seasoned are my favorite alternatives.
Imagine a scenario where you had a poly triad - a guy, a girl and a third, all bisexuals. Now imagine a scenario where the first two get married. It occurred to me that the third person has the potential to give one of the most memorable wedding speeches in history.
Afros are imported from Afroca.
Spooning is the little sex position that could.
Does penor butter come out of a penis?
Fursuits are a fashion faux paws.
If you're going to court downtown and you're being tried for a crime, do you still have to pay to park?
If you're a tall person dating a short person, you can have a standing O every day.
Is cheap, healthy food gastroeconomical?
Do you think some handicapped people sleep wheel?
I want to make a line of condoms based off of super heroes. We could have one be the Juggernaut, bitch.
There are plenty of touchy subjects out there, and if someone has their heart in the right place, does it make a lot of sense to get caught up in semantics? If someone is too insistent upon a certain way of speaking about something, doesn't that person risk alienating others, even those that would agree or be sympathetic?
Just like guys have testosterone, I think women should have breastosterone.
What kinds of sex positions would go in the Karma Sutra?
Did Evil Kinevil get married in the Evil Cathedral?
I know nuns can get married to the lord, but if a priest does it, is it gay marriage?
Dr. Mario is a much funnier game if you think of him as a breast augmentation doctor.
Carbuncle is a really cute name.