Cannot Even Explain...
Today was one of the most amazing days I have had in some time. I woke up around 3 and went to Evelyn Bay w/Amanda, Mandi, and Tracey. I got a hot drink and sat down on a big couch to read the Screwtape Letters, which i find to be rather interesting. It was cozy and well spent. Then back for dinner, which was alright. Then out w/my suitemate who I happen to love. Then I cleaned and got a chance to talk to my dad.
I have amazing friends!
Dad thinks I should come down to Tennessee and stay w/him this summer and it looks good. There are quite a few perks to this. No rent. Possibly getting a car. And most importantly spending a summer w/my dad, neice and 1/2 sister Angie. This is an amazing offer to me mainly for the last reason. Most of my life I never really felt like I could say I have a dad and now he is changing and i have this chance before i graduate and head out on my own, to allow him to be part of my life. This could heal a lot of things and help make me whole in some places that weren't whole before. It's been something that has eaten at my heart and i may finally get a chance to be released from some of the bitterness and hurt..and the vacancy of a father could be filled. And i've been to church w/Dad, but now he goes on his own!
When I talked to my mom about it, i was afraid she wouldn't like the idea, but she agrees it is something i need to do. she too had an alcoholic father and it took her some time to heal from that, and she knows the importance. Also i must say i'm real appreciative for the fact that my mom and i can talk now and understand ea. other. I feel like she's a friend...it's, amazing. Today she told me she gave a lot of that to God and she prays to Him to help her to give up the bitterness because she knows she can't do it on her own! I never thought i'd hear that!
plus my sister calls me now...i think she loves me!
so much is coming together in my family, and that is such an amazing feeling in my heart, because it is something I have always wanted. I know there is much more that must be fixed, but this is such a vast improvement.
Thank you God! I mean it, Thank you!
I have amazing friends!
Dad thinks I should come down to Tennessee and stay w/him this summer and it looks good. There are quite a few perks to this. No rent. Possibly getting a car. And most importantly spending a summer w/my dad, neice and 1/2 sister Angie. This is an amazing offer to me mainly for the last reason. Most of my life I never really felt like I could say I have a dad and now he is changing and i have this chance before i graduate and head out on my own, to allow him to be part of my life. This could heal a lot of things and help make me whole in some places that weren't whole before. It's been something that has eaten at my heart and i may finally get a chance to be released from some of the bitterness and hurt..and the vacancy of a father could be filled. And i've been to church w/Dad, but now he goes on his own!
When I talked to my mom about it, i was afraid she wouldn't like the idea, but she agrees it is something i need to do. she too had an alcoholic father and it took her some time to heal from that, and she knows the importance. Also i must say i'm real appreciative for the fact that my mom and i can talk now and understand ea. other. I feel like she's a friend...it's, amazing. Today she told me she gave a lot of that to God and she prays to Him to help her to give up the bitterness because she knows she can't do it on her own! I never thought i'd hear that!
plus my sister calls me now...i think she loves me!
so much is coming together in my family, and that is such an amazing feeling in my heart, because it is something I have always wanted. I know there is much more that must be fixed, but this is such a vast improvement.
Thank you God! I mean it, Thank you!