YTD - 1/12/10
29th November
Wake up stupidly early. Saving $50 on the tickets seems like a very unfortunate compromise now. I forgot to get leaving travel details and the AirAsia guy at Perth International is a bit of a douche, refusing to print our itineraries for Indonesian VOA’s. Wander around trying to find a printer as directed by the aforementioned AirAsia guy to no avail. Angela starts to sob and I secure a pen & paper, wander back to the AirAsia desk ready to start talking names and scare people into action through accountability.
The next lady is way nicer, sorts it in less than a 10th of the time we spent talking to the aforementioned douche who is not wearing a nametag but I’ve had no sleep and I don’t care. Board plane, the seats are super roomy and there’s noone else in our row so it feels like business class. Discover AirAsia don’t have any form of entertainment; don’t have headphones in carry on, watch subtitled anime. Eat chicken sandwich. Land. Find taxi. Too tired to haggle. Lowball with 1/3rd initial offer and walk away. Taxi driver does not pursue. Find toilet, return to taxi driver, pay price, drive through bali.
Pass some awesome statues. The place is really, really, really clean. Drive up to hotel. Crazy awesome entrance for mid-range hotel. Crazy awesome lobby. Everything’s clean, taxi didn’t insist on a tip. Enter room 5 hours early without any questions, a/c already on and its super pwnz. Room is crazy big and crazy-clean. Shown everything by friendly guy who also doesn’t appear to want a tip. Still haven’t seen a piece of rubbish or smelt an odd odor. Collapse on bed. . Pass out in bed.
Wake up several hours later. Wander around. Wander around some more. Wander along shore. Find restaurant with people eating in, enter, order pizza.
Eat greatest pizza I’ve had in three years for $6 (P1). Still yet to see piece of rubbish. Hawkers dis-engage within 30 seconds (!). Weather is pretty damn decent, watch sunset, drink $2 kingbrowns of totally drinkable beer.
Go back to hotel. Drink beer in restaurant. Watch rest of sunset. Go back to room. . Order room service which is of bloody decent quality for price, pass out.
30th November
Decide on plan. Shuttle to mall. Use secured ATM. Wander around. Eat delicious Japanese food. Buy timekeeping device, wallet, investigate bookstore, shuttle back to hotel. Wander around collecting spa pamphlets. Go to best looking one with super friendly green unformed people. Chill out with 1 hour massage.
Wander back to beach using yesterdays discovered shortcut. Eat delicious pizza again. Drink beer. Drink wine. Eat more delicious pizza (P2). Half soused, decide on going back for another massage. Massage people are super friendly again, it’s all awesome. Leave throughrally masseused. Wander back to hotel. Shower. . Nap. Shower. Go for walk towards Kuta. There’s little bats doing loops around the street lights. Angela does little loops around the street lights watching the bats. Find external menu mentioning Beef Rendang. Dash inside before closing. Told by staff to chill since they were still going to be open for another hour.
Eat totally delicious Beef Rendang for $8. Wander back towards hotel. Angela wishes to investigate random statute but I hint that it’s not a good idea as there’s no more hotels that way (ergo, no more security) and it’s dark and scary looking and we should come back again tomorrow during the day (that beef rendang was -really- delicious).
Walk back towards hotel. See illegal fireworks being fired few minutes later from scary-looking direction. Police whistles are blown, lights are flashed. Arrive at hotel. Rehydrate. Pool is closed (due to aids ). Run bath. Pipe armin to bathroom.
In the bath, with Armin Van Buuren (and standard issue Hot Chick ™).
Sleep.
1st December 2010
Wake up. Angela wants to get breakfast but I’m too tired so she goes before they shut down the buffet. Try to sleep but the sun is too bright, stagger to the shower and I’m molested by heat (bathroom has no a/c). Angela returns and goes for swim. Sit on balcony eating pot noodle watching her frolic like a siren in the water.
I suggested trying to find a driver for the day and running off to a Monkey Forest for a little while. The hotel has a desk where information guys seem to sit offering random tours and their services. Chat to a dude and he seems rather upset with my lowball offers but it’s around midday by this point so I’m guessing he hasn’t had any other customers. We finally agree on 300,000 rupiah for the afternoon ($33) and he goes to get his vehicle. Coming back a few minutes later I’m surprised to discover it’s a brand new van with a/c and leather seats.
On the way to monkey forest we stop at a few factories along the way. The first one produces sarongs, everything is priced in USD and not very awesome. We depart without purchasing anything. I chat some more with the driver and he seems to get the hint that frontend western storefronts are not what I’m after. Pulling into a side ally he stops at a silver smith workshop.
Everyone smells a little odd, the welder in use looks like it’s about to explode and the ‘factory’ is just two guys sitting at simple tables with tin snips. A friendly chap explains the silver-smithing process in broken English and walks us inside to a very un-fancy store. We pick out a few items and I leave the bargaining to Angela as she’s still holding a substantial grudge against the populace that grifted her out of $35 on the first day. She verbally kicks the guys ass and after ten minutes and a few phone calls, emerges victorious with a few pieces of very cool sterling silver jewelry for less than a third of the original price.
We trundle on and our friendly guide asks if we want to stop for lunch. Heading down a dodgy looking back ally I’m expecting a backwater local food van but instead we emerge to a very neat & tidy restaurant type tower that overlooks the countryside (P3). Angela takes a photo of the turtle shaped pizza oven. After a delicious curry we trundle along to the Ubud Monkey Forest.
We wander around for a while, every few minutes I pounce my hands on Angela pretending to be a monkey, much my great amusement - But I’m pretty sure eventually she’s just humoring me. I advise her it’s just practice for when a real monkey jumps on her. Several minutes later a real monkey lands on her and she’s not that scared. Cunning Scheme Victory!
We wander around for some more, get rained on a little and I suggest sitting down under a tree. Everyone is standing next to monkeys in the hope that one will climb on them, but I figure that if you just sit down for a few minutes the monkies will come to you.
Several minutes’ later operation Cunning Scheme II meets great success and a frustrated monkey, unable to steal Angela’s hairclip, bites her ear (P5).
We meander home via back streets as per my request and I stare from a leather chair inside my airtight temperature controlled environment at farmers working rice fields.
Conversing with the driver more I discover that he too cannot afford a house. Le fu, world, le fu. We tee up a time tomorrow evening for him to driver us to see some dancing/chanting (see Baraka’s chata-chata-chata scene) and I tip him 50k.
Munching on a burger from the hotel restaurant we decide to checkout in the in-house spa which turns out to be not as friendly as the one from yesterday but gives a better massage. Wandering back we collapse on the bed for a few hours.
Waking up we decided to go for a wander north to split (another) pizza from the totally awesome Italian Restaurant from the day before. The restaurant is super busy so we keep on walking further towards the Seminyak (more upper-market) section and wander past some amazing looking restaurants with infinity pools.
I’m struck for a second time with a sense dejavu between here and Zanzibar and once again voice my opinion that people don’t make a big enough fuss about Bali as they should. Heck, even typing the word now elicits negative connotations in my mind.
Turning back we figure the main dinner rush is gone and we wander inside, get a pizza, margaritas.. And then I see it. Tiramisu. I order some but I’ve got indecision since they also have a delicious looking crème brulae. I order another margarita to help loosen Angela’s calorie reservations (and jowls) and convince her to split one of each of the deserts with me. They’re both pretty fucking phenomenal. And yes, their quality did warrant a cuss.
Wake up stupidly early. Saving $50 on the tickets seems like a very unfortunate compromise now. I forgot to get leaving travel details and the AirAsia guy at Perth International is a bit of a douche, refusing to print our itineraries for Indonesian VOA’s. Wander around trying to find a printer as directed by the aforementioned AirAsia guy to no avail. Angela starts to sob and I secure a pen & paper, wander back to the AirAsia desk ready to start talking names and scare people into action through accountability.
The next lady is way nicer, sorts it in less than a 10th of the time we spent talking to the aforementioned douche who is not wearing a nametag but I’ve had no sleep and I don’t care. Board plane, the seats are super roomy and there’s noone else in our row so it feels like business class. Discover AirAsia don’t have any form of entertainment; don’t have headphones in carry on, watch subtitled anime. Eat chicken sandwich. Land. Find taxi. Too tired to haggle. Lowball with 1/3rd initial offer and walk away. Taxi driver does not pursue. Find toilet, return to taxi driver, pay price, drive through bali.
Pass some awesome statues. The place is really, really, really clean. Drive up to hotel. Crazy awesome entrance for mid-range hotel. Crazy awesome lobby. Everything’s clean, taxi didn’t insist on a tip. Enter room 5 hours early without any questions, a/c already on and its super pwnz. Room is crazy big and crazy-clean. Shown everything by friendly guy who also doesn’t appear to want a tip. Still haven’t seen a piece of rubbish or smelt an odd odor. Collapse on bed. . Pass out in bed.
Wake up several hours later. Wander around. Wander around some more. Wander along shore. Find restaurant with people eating in, enter, order pizza.
Eat greatest pizza I’ve had in three years for $6 (P1). Still yet to see piece of rubbish. Hawkers dis-engage within 30 seconds (!). Weather is pretty damn decent, watch sunset, drink $2 kingbrowns of totally drinkable beer.
Go back to hotel. Drink beer in restaurant. Watch rest of sunset. Go back to room. . Order room service which is of bloody decent quality for price, pass out.
30th November
Decide on plan. Shuttle to mall. Use secured ATM. Wander around. Eat delicious Japanese food. Buy timekeeping device, wallet, investigate bookstore, shuttle back to hotel. Wander around collecting spa pamphlets. Go to best looking one with super friendly green unformed people. Chill out with 1 hour massage.
Wander back to beach using yesterdays discovered shortcut. Eat delicious pizza again. Drink beer. Drink wine. Eat more delicious pizza (P2). Half soused, decide on going back for another massage. Massage people are super friendly again, it’s all awesome. Leave throughrally masseused. Wander back to hotel. Shower. . Nap. Shower. Go for walk towards Kuta. There’s little bats doing loops around the street lights. Angela does little loops around the street lights watching the bats. Find external menu mentioning Beef Rendang. Dash inside before closing. Told by staff to chill since they were still going to be open for another hour.
Eat totally delicious Beef Rendang for $8. Wander back towards hotel. Angela wishes to investigate random statute but I hint that it’s not a good idea as there’s no more hotels that way (ergo, no more security) and it’s dark and scary looking and we should come back again tomorrow during the day (that beef rendang was -really- delicious).
Walk back towards hotel. See illegal fireworks being fired few minutes later from scary-looking direction. Police whistles are blown, lights are flashed. Arrive at hotel. Rehydrate. Pool is closed (due to aids ). Run bath. Pipe armin to bathroom.
In the bath, with Armin Van Buuren (and standard issue Hot Chick ™).
Sleep.
1st December 2010
Wake up. Angela wants to get breakfast but I’m too tired so she goes before they shut down the buffet. Try to sleep but the sun is too bright, stagger to the shower and I’m molested by heat (bathroom has no a/c). Angela returns and goes for swim. Sit on balcony eating pot noodle watching her frolic like a siren in the water.
I suggested trying to find a driver for the day and running off to a Monkey Forest for a little while. The hotel has a desk where information guys seem to sit offering random tours and their services. Chat to a dude and he seems rather upset with my lowball offers but it’s around midday by this point so I’m guessing he hasn’t had any other customers. We finally agree on 300,000 rupiah for the afternoon ($33) and he goes to get his vehicle. Coming back a few minutes later I’m surprised to discover it’s a brand new van with a/c and leather seats.
On the way to monkey forest we stop at a few factories along the way. The first one produces sarongs, everything is priced in USD and not very awesome. We depart without purchasing anything. I chat some more with the driver and he seems to get the hint that frontend western storefronts are not what I’m after. Pulling into a side ally he stops at a silver smith workshop.
Everyone smells a little odd, the welder in use looks like it’s about to explode and the ‘factory’ is just two guys sitting at simple tables with tin snips. A friendly chap explains the silver-smithing process in broken English and walks us inside to a very un-fancy store. We pick out a few items and I leave the bargaining to Angela as she’s still holding a substantial grudge against the populace that grifted her out of $35 on the first day. She verbally kicks the guys ass and after ten minutes and a few phone calls, emerges victorious with a few pieces of very cool sterling silver jewelry for less than a third of the original price.
We trundle on and our friendly guide asks if we want to stop for lunch. Heading down a dodgy looking back ally I’m expecting a backwater local food van but instead we emerge to a very neat & tidy restaurant type tower that overlooks the countryside (P3). Angela takes a photo of the turtle shaped pizza oven. After a delicious curry we trundle along to the Ubud Monkey Forest.
We wander around for a while, every few minutes I pounce my hands on Angela pretending to be a monkey, much my great amusement - But I’m pretty sure eventually she’s just humoring me. I advise her it’s just practice for when a real monkey jumps on her. Several minutes later a real monkey lands on her and she’s not that scared. Cunning Scheme Victory!
We wander around for some more, get rained on a little and I suggest sitting down under a tree. Everyone is standing next to monkeys in the hope that one will climb on them, but I figure that if you just sit down for a few minutes the monkies will come to you.
Several minutes’ later operation Cunning Scheme II meets great success and a frustrated monkey, unable to steal Angela’s hairclip, bites her ear (P5).
We meander home via back streets as per my request and I stare from a leather chair inside my airtight temperature controlled environment at farmers working rice fields.
Conversing with the driver more I discover that he too cannot afford a house. Le fu, world, le fu. We tee up a time tomorrow evening for him to driver us to see some dancing/chanting (see Baraka’s chata-chata-chata scene) and I tip him 50k.
Munching on a burger from the hotel restaurant we decide to checkout in the in-house spa which turns out to be not as friendly as the one from yesterday but gives a better massage. Wandering back we collapse on the bed for a few hours.
Waking up we decided to go for a wander north to split (another) pizza from the totally awesome Italian Restaurant from the day before. The restaurant is super busy so we keep on walking further towards the Seminyak (more upper-market) section and wander past some amazing looking restaurants with infinity pools.
I’m struck for a second time with a sense dejavu between here and Zanzibar and once again voice my opinion that people don’t make a big enough fuss about Bali as they should. Heck, even typing the word now elicits negative connotations in my mind.
Turning back we figure the main dinner rush is gone and we wander inside, get a pizza, margaritas.. And then I see it. Tiramisu. I order some but I’ve got indecision since they also have a delicious looking crème brulae. I order another margarita to help loosen Angela’s calorie reservations (and jowls) and convince her to split one of each of the deserts with me. They’re both pretty fucking phenomenal. And yes, their quality did warrant a cuss.