indecomposable?
well today is not bad but im in quandry again i dont wanna say but watever life is is full of bull shit who cares anymore i know i love ariel she is wat i look forward to in the day it what compells me to do my work now so that i can see her next semester and the year after that but latly its has been quite quere but i still love her but latly i been asking myself if i should if its worth it how it benefits me and everything i that i have done with her backs it all up but wat i want is an actual relationship where when someone asks me if i am in a reltionship with her i can say yes but regretably i always say the truth which hurts each and every time i say it,but when that is over they always tell me "well you guys look as if yur going out why arent you?"then that part just sucks cuase all i get is the person telling me wtf is up with that or sumthing and i go into a stat of thought and think about it and all i want to do is cry.....................omg im such a dumbass................................................do yu have to go through so much to be loved? thats all i really wanted,i don't know if the feeling i have for ariel is love?but the connection that i have made with her that makes me feel this way about her is wat i love and cherish...........................today she asked me wats wrong nothing is wrong but that would be lieing im not sure anymore i know wat i feel for ariel is strong but i dont know if the whole lets just be friends thing is getting to me or if she really means it but watever is is it is getting to me and the feeling i had for her is painfully fading away..................and its scaring me becuase i dont want to lose her but i know that she was never mine and that is wat makes me want to cry the most..................the lil emo kid