[locked to Alan]

[mr_colbert]

Heeeeey, buddy. There's a party going down. I wanna make a big appearance. I think you should come with me.

Comments

[alan_shore]

...why am I suddenly apprehensive?

[mr_colbert]

Because I'm not asking you to a sleepover. Which sounds really gay, by the way.

[alan_shore]

Does it. Being heterosexual, I had no idea.

[mr_colbert]

You're trying to distract me, Alan. Stop it. I see right through your Commie webs of lies. Will you come to the party with me? Circle yes or no.

[alan_shore]

What party? Why aren't you asking Denny, if your intent is to put on a show?

[mr_colbert]

Because Denny's busy right now. I'd ask both of you but he's running around shooting birds or hobos or something.

It's some benefit gala thing. I want to wear my tux again. I look good in it.

[alan_shore]

*laughs* You, what, you want me there on your arm?

I don't...Denny's much more the gala type. If the cause is worthy, I'll be happy to make a contribution, but...

[mr_colbert]

No, I want you there next to me being my friend. The arm spot is reserved for my wife who doesn't want to come. She told me to ask a BFF.

The cause is something about an island thing. It was wiped out and now people are trying to rebuild it. I don't know exactly how it works but I'll give them money if that means I can go party.

[alan_shore]

Why doesn't your wife want to go?

[mr_colbert]

The same reason she's not on the Report with me every night, she prefers to stay more private. She said it's ok if I went with you.

[alan_shore]

All right. Where and when is the party being held?

[mr_colbert]

YES! Thank you, Alan! Remind me to give you a hug later. It's tomorrow at the Grand Hyatt Hotel. I can pick you up when you come in to town and stuff.

[alan_shore]

That was an "all right, I'm willing to continue this discussion" not an "all right, I'll go." It's tomorrow? Did you consider that I might have plans?

Although if it's in New York, I could stop by to visit Kara.

[mr_colbert]

Yes, it's tomorrow. You should go.

I'll tell you the truth because I always do. No, I did not think about if you had plans. That's why I asked you. See how considerate I am?

It is in New York. It works out perfectly!

[alan_shore]

Stephen...you're my friend, and whenever we spend time together, whatever we may be doing, I generally manage to have a good time, but I'm not sure I'm up to attending a gala. Can't we just go to dinner or play laser tag or something?

[mr_colbert]

You can be up to it! There will be food and booze and people loving ME! What's not to like? We'll do both... next week.