Rant! Feel free to skip!
You know, I've been sitting here thinking about Cordelia and reading some old meta on her and her characterization over the course of the series (and, of course, the dubious behind-the-scenes issues with CC) and just feeling really disappointed with it, frankly.
There are so many things I like about season 3. I love the sense of family, most of all, and it's twice as poignant with the knowledge of what's coming. I love Hearthrob as a season opener. I love Darla, from the moment she returns, and I never fail to tear up when she stakes herself. I especially love this line: "we did so many terrible things together. We can never make up for any of it, you know that, don't you?" To me, it's the perfect line; I can't decide if Darla is saying that as to inform Angel, like, you DO realize that, don't you? OR if she's finally coming to terms with what Angel knew all along, that is, that she will never be redeemed nor will he. That just breaks my heart.
I digress.
Anyway, I just think about season 3 and get so utterly disappointed with so much of it, particularly Cordelia. I hate that, suddenly, Cordelia is nothing more than some holy relic of Angel's mission and the quest for redemption. She was interesting because, as much as she was invested in the mission, she didn't strive to be the long-suffering martyr Angel saw himself as. She was an effective foil to that. And, yes, people do grow up; but people do not lose every recognizable character trait in the face of the greater good.
I think ME could have taken a lot of different angles with s3. At the beginning, the build-up of the harrowing visions is this huge, multi-episode deal (even back in s2, such as 'Dead End'), and suddenly it becomes absolutely nothing post-Birthday. But, you know, if I were Cordelia and I had these visions forced upon me-- in order to enable me to help people, which I did as selflessly as I could-- and then I discovered that, for all my trouble, I was going to die? I would probably resent the PTB pretty strongly. And not only that, but if I had explicitly stated over and over how painful the visions were, and how much worse they were getting, and my friends never made a really definitive move to help me, or even ease my suffering? I would be pretty pissed about that, too. I think that could have been a very effective storyline.
Instead, we got Skip-- who had his funny moments, yes-- who inexplicably "demonizes" Cordelia (whatever that means, except giving one the power to act as a flashlight in random situations). Also, rather than striving against her own death, she is simply resigned to her fate. It's as if, working with Angel for so long, she suddenly thinks she deserves as much punishment as he does; consequently, she simply accepts it. Ugh. Thanks, Angel.
And the Cordelia/Angel on-screen relationship? I find it horrifying, most of the time, although it does have it's supremely wonderful moments. I love the ending in Disharmony; in fact, I love how Cordelia's forgiveness is so important to Angel, in general. I also enjoy the scene at the end of Provider (although I find the rest of the episode to be rather cheap), but more for the sense of family than the potential romantic entaglements. I also like Hearthrob, and every interaction between the two of them in the episode. You're Welcome, of course, I love. I think when Angel first sees Cordelia and hugs her-- well, I find it hard to believe that he didn't love her. I also like Waiting in the Wings, although Gunn's expression when describing the ballet is really the stand-out moment for me. CHARLES GUNN LOVES BALLET.
But I hate kyerumption, and moira, and the frequent anvils falling all over the place in regards to their relationship. I hate the Groo/Cordelia/Angel triangle beyond measure. I do like when Angel describes Groo and ends with "emotionally available," because it just makes me laugh. Oh, Angel. I hate Tomorrow so much I can't bear watching it; I think I've watched it twice, and most of the time, I have to grit my teeth to avoid fast-forwarding through the sappy Cordelia/Angel scenes. That is not Cordelia/Angel. That is a cheaper Buffy/Angel. Angel was a more adult show, and most of the time, I felt it handled relationships in a more adult manner; unfortunately, Cordelia/Angel is the one it didn't. I could buy the transcendent, all-encompassing love of Buffy and Angel, in the earlier years, as it seemed to be a natural progression for both characters. It does not work for Angel and Cordelia, and rightly so.
I do like some of the scenes in Awakening, however, but only in context. I love that, in Angel's psyche, he desires those grand, heroic scenes and melodramatic declarations of love or what have you. That is so very Angel. It amuses me, really, more than anything. The sex scene in Awakening, however, I have trouble watching; DB and CC seem so wildly uncomfortable that it makes me uncomfortable, too. I can hardly bear watching it.
As I'm writing this, I can feel it turning into a rant. I apologize. Angel and Cordelia could've worked so well, under a different scheme. I particularly would have enjoyed them "accidentally" falling into it, and resisting it the entire way-- I can just hear both of them going "oh my GOD what are we doing?!" in a vaguely disgusted manner. That would've worked for me, and made me laugh a lot. Kind of like in Waiting in the Wings, when they re-enact the melodramatic dressing room scene. It would be more effective if I transcribed the dialogue, but I just remember Angel: "You want me to have sex with you, now, right here" followed by them just pushing their lips together. Both of them seem so disinterested and we-have-to-do-this, and I think that was pretty much the essence of the two of them. Maybe Angel digs the "our love is forever yet very tragic," but I think Cordelia would've been very put-off by it. I know I would have, but that is neither here nor there.
But I think the most disappointing thing for me is that, as a result of how poorly the relationship and Cordelia's characterization were handled on the show, there is very little Cordelia/Angel written at all. There are some wonderful C/A authors out there, but on the whole, it hardly compares to the factions of Buffy/Angel and Spike/Buffy and Angel/Spike and whoever/whoever out there. In fact, there is an incredible deficiency of Cordelia at all. It saddens me to know that most authors actively avoid writing Cordelia. It saddens me that, when I write Cordelia, I typically avoid season 3 because I can't figure out how to deal with the character assassination going on.
There are some WONDERFUL C/A writers, that's for sure. And the stuff they write is glorious and leaves me shame-faced at everything I post. But there are epics about other pairings, while most (but not all!) Cordelia/Angel is one-shot. There are stacks of Buffy or Angel or Spike or Gunn or Wesley darkfic all over the place, and I've read maybe a handful of non-drabble darkfic involving Cordelia. I think it would be incredibly interesting to delve into Cordelia's darker urges, which seem neglected in fandom. I know that, on the show, she never had the wild, deeply sexual relationships that Angel/Darla or Buffy/Spike had; but I hardly doubt she was incapable of it.
In fact, I would love to see Angel/Cordelia involving a strap-on. Jesus.
I also want to see a Cordelia/Angel/Connor triangle. I know, how revolting, but I just have this image of the three of them, all dark-haired and beautiful, lying in bed together. Naked. I blame it on a lot of the gorgeous Angel/Connor and Angel/Connor/Spike stuff out there. Boy, howdy.
Basically, the handling of Cordelia and her relationship to Angel, canon-wise, depresses me because it deeply narrows the breadth of fic involving the two of them. How disheartening. I have a secret love of Angel/Spike, and probably read that more often than any other pairing; I harbor a suspicion that, in all honesty, their relationship (however subtextual) is the only one with the potential to span more than a few years. But that is not the point of this. The point is, I wish that there was the same span of Cordelia/Angel that there is Angel/Spike, or Angel/Buffy, or Spike/Buffy.
I should probably start working on that. My next post will be everything I love about Cordelia/Angel, because they are my OTP and one of the most realistic couples in the Buffyverse, in my opinion.
On a completely different note: HAHAHA for my disappointing mood icon. Oh KEVIN.
There are so many things I like about season 3. I love the sense of family, most of all, and it's twice as poignant with the knowledge of what's coming. I love Hearthrob as a season opener. I love Darla, from the moment she returns, and I never fail to tear up when she stakes herself. I especially love this line: "we did so many terrible things together. We can never make up for any of it, you know that, don't you?" To me, it's the perfect line; I can't decide if Darla is saying that as to inform Angel, like, you DO realize that, don't you? OR if she's finally coming to terms with what Angel knew all along, that is, that she will never be redeemed nor will he. That just breaks my heart.
I digress.
Anyway, I just think about season 3 and get so utterly disappointed with so much of it, particularly Cordelia. I hate that, suddenly, Cordelia is nothing more than some holy relic of Angel's mission and the quest for redemption. She was interesting because, as much as she was invested in the mission, she didn't strive to be the long-suffering martyr Angel saw himself as. She was an effective foil to that. And, yes, people do grow up; but people do not lose every recognizable character trait in the face of the greater good.
I think ME could have taken a lot of different angles with s3. At the beginning, the build-up of the harrowing visions is this huge, multi-episode deal (even back in s2, such as 'Dead End'), and suddenly it becomes absolutely nothing post-Birthday. But, you know, if I were Cordelia and I had these visions forced upon me-- in order to enable me to help people, which I did as selflessly as I could-- and then I discovered that, for all my trouble, I was going to die? I would probably resent the PTB pretty strongly. And not only that, but if I had explicitly stated over and over how painful the visions were, and how much worse they were getting, and my friends never made a really definitive move to help me, or even ease my suffering? I would be pretty pissed about that, too. I think that could have been a very effective storyline.
Instead, we got Skip-- who had his funny moments, yes-- who inexplicably "demonizes" Cordelia (whatever that means, except giving one the power to act as a flashlight in random situations). Also, rather than striving against her own death, she is simply resigned to her fate. It's as if, working with Angel for so long, she suddenly thinks she deserves as much punishment as he does; consequently, she simply accepts it. Ugh. Thanks, Angel.
And the Cordelia/Angel on-screen relationship? I find it horrifying, most of the time, although it does have it's supremely wonderful moments. I love the ending in Disharmony; in fact, I love how Cordelia's forgiveness is so important to Angel, in general. I also enjoy the scene at the end of Provider (although I find the rest of the episode to be rather cheap), but more for the sense of family than the potential romantic entaglements. I also like Hearthrob, and every interaction between the two of them in the episode. You're Welcome, of course, I love. I think when Angel first sees Cordelia and hugs her-- well, I find it hard to believe that he didn't love her. I also like Waiting in the Wings, although Gunn's expression when describing the ballet is really the stand-out moment for me. CHARLES GUNN LOVES BALLET.
But I hate kyerumption, and moira, and the frequent anvils falling all over the place in regards to their relationship. I hate the Groo/Cordelia/Angel triangle beyond measure. I do like when Angel describes Groo and ends with "emotionally available," because it just makes me laugh. Oh, Angel. I hate Tomorrow so much I can't bear watching it; I think I've watched it twice, and most of the time, I have to grit my teeth to avoid fast-forwarding through the sappy Cordelia/Angel scenes. That is not Cordelia/Angel. That is a cheaper Buffy/Angel. Angel was a more adult show, and most of the time, I felt it handled relationships in a more adult manner; unfortunately, Cordelia/Angel is the one it didn't. I could buy the transcendent, all-encompassing love of Buffy and Angel, in the earlier years, as it seemed to be a natural progression for both characters. It does not work for Angel and Cordelia, and rightly so.
I do like some of the scenes in Awakening, however, but only in context. I love that, in Angel's psyche, he desires those grand, heroic scenes and melodramatic declarations of love or what have you. That is so very Angel. It amuses me, really, more than anything. The sex scene in Awakening, however, I have trouble watching; DB and CC seem so wildly uncomfortable that it makes me uncomfortable, too. I can hardly bear watching it.
As I'm writing this, I can feel it turning into a rant. I apologize. Angel and Cordelia could've worked so well, under a different scheme. I particularly would have enjoyed them "accidentally" falling into it, and resisting it the entire way-- I can just hear both of them going "oh my GOD what are we doing?!" in a vaguely disgusted manner. That would've worked for me, and made me laugh a lot. Kind of like in Waiting in the Wings, when they re-enact the melodramatic dressing room scene. It would be more effective if I transcribed the dialogue, but I just remember Angel: "You want me to have sex with you, now, right here" followed by them just pushing their lips together. Both of them seem so disinterested and we-have-to-do-this, and I think that was pretty much the essence of the two of them. Maybe Angel digs the "our love is forever yet very tragic," but I think Cordelia would've been very put-off by it. I know I would have, but that is neither here nor there.
But I think the most disappointing thing for me is that, as a result of how poorly the relationship and Cordelia's characterization were handled on the show, there is very little Cordelia/Angel written at all. There are some wonderful C/A authors out there, but on the whole, it hardly compares to the factions of Buffy/Angel and Spike/Buffy and Angel/Spike and whoever/whoever out there. In fact, there is an incredible deficiency of Cordelia at all. It saddens me to know that most authors actively avoid writing Cordelia. It saddens me that, when I write Cordelia, I typically avoid season 3 because I can't figure out how to deal with the character assassination going on.
There are some WONDERFUL C/A writers, that's for sure. And the stuff they write is glorious and leaves me shame-faced at everything I post. But there are epics about other pairings, while most (but not all!) Cordelia/Angel is one-shot. There are stacks of Buffy or Angel or Spike or Gunn or Wesley darkfic all over the place, and I've read maybe a handful of non-drabble darkfic involving Cordelia. I think it would be incredibly interesting to delve into Cordelia's darker urges, which seem neglected in fandom. I know that, on the show, she never had the wild, deeply sexual relationships that Angel/Darla or Buffy/Spike had; but I hardly doubt she was incapable of it.
In fact, I would love to see Angel/Cordelia involving a strap-on. Jesus.
I also want to see a Cordelia/Angel/Connor triangle. I know, how revolting, but I just have this image of the three of them, all dark-haired and beautiful, lying in bed together. Naked. I blame it on a lot of the gorgeous Angel/Connor and Angel/Connor/Spike stuff out there. Boy, howdy.
Basically, the handling of Cordelia and her relationship to Angel, canon-wise, depresses me because it deeply narrows the breadth of fic involving the two of them. How disheartening. I have a secret love of Angel/Spike, and probably read that more often than any other pairing; I harbor a suspicion that, in all honesty, their relationship (however subtextual) is the only one with the potential to span more than a few years. But that is not the point of this. The point is, I wish that there was the same span of Cordelia/Angel that there is Angel/Spike, or Angel/Buffy, or Spike/Buffy.
I should probably start working on that. My next post will be everything I love about Cordelia/Angel, because they are my OTP and one of the most realistic couples in the Buffyverse, in my opinion.
On a completely different note: HAHAHA for my disappointing mood icon. Oh KEVIN.