you have no idea
you know, today was a pretty good day. I slept in, I had good breakfast (bacon and eggs, cooked it myself thank you very much) I went to the church and got some stuff for my mom, I ate bojangles for lunch and I danced out in the sun reading my book in my bathin suit and thought maybe I'd get a little tan. and then I went and played another rousing round of frisbee golf with Ish and George and Jessica and Opie. and later I hung out with eric and Lance and we watched UNC barely squeak past Villanova.but before I went to erics I had one of the single worst experiences in my life and I can't even explain why. It was about the worst I've felt in a long time tho I'll tell you that much. I was going back by George's house to bring his cell phone he left in my car and I ran off the driveway a bit trying not to hit any cars and Anne saw me and I was like haha yea I'm a terrible driver I know. but when I came inside and I walked into the room where everyone was. I felt frozen. everyone was looking at me. It was the coldest I've ever felt. I could feel all the hate and I could feel that they all thought they were better than me. and Chelsey tried to start some small talk but it was almost as if she was mocking me. and I felt like everyone was laughing with her. I felt so cornered. I don't know why but I was so scared. I just. I felt awful. and yall know me. I'm not an insecure person. I'm very confident. cocky almost. but. walking in that room I had to wonder where whitneymozingo went because I felt like a terrified little 5-year old girl looking for her mom in the mall. it just makes me wonder how many times I've done this to someone. how many times have I been nice to someone just to make fun of them. you know how it is. when everyone is in on the joke except the kid that nobody likes. and when he leaves the room you all crack up. how could people do this to other people? how could people make me feel like this? I wish I could really explain what it felt like but I can't. I've never wanted to run and hide and cry so bad...you have no idea. you just have no idea.