Getting Better
Suddenly the thought of going to youth tonight excites me. I feel like I've been. I dunno. out of commission, hah, for the past few days. well excep that I did get to see Japers on friday. we had a good afternoon together. I just love being with him. even if I was just like, in my pjs and I hadn't fixed my hair... it was nice just hangin out with him. but then I felt better saturday morning and i worked and then saturday night was my mommys birthay so we went to J. Bartons. I rather liked it. I'm sure its better when the weathers nice tho. I had a crazy weird dream last night tho I was in some traveling play thing. I wasn't the main character, I was the co-star. but people kept coming backstage and telling me they loved my performance and that I was amazing and blake came back there one night and said how he felt stupid that he had missed it the whole time how amazing I was and he kissed me. and I kissed him back. and then when he moved away Japers was standing there with flowers for me and he dropped them and a card fell out that said how beautiful and perfect he thought I was and he left. and I felt so bad. and I woke up crying. which was odd. but I did. it was sad. and I was glad that I had not been kissing blake. and that Blake has his own girlfriend to be kissing. and that JP did not leave and get mad at me. and the world is just like its supposed to be. in some ways. which is comforting. well i'm gonna go get dressed and maybe even take a shower. I love you kids. and I love you JP.