(no subject)
When I started this business, it wasn't easy. Worse hours, horrendous co-workers and shit treatment. And slowly as the years went by I was able to be in charge and start making things better an better as we went on.
But damn, some jobs just slingshot you back into the old days.
I'm older. SO much older than when I started and in a space that old me would have envied, but it's amazing the outward ways that it shows on my face and body. My boss saw me on the 2nd week and noticed a giant new strip of grey in my hair. "Did we do that?" I mean... yeah. Doing your best to be a 24/7 asshole kinda does a number on people. And the weather was painful. Not only burned, but super burned. I just don't tan like I used to. There used to be a time I'd work in the sun and come back as dark as my dad, now it just goes from light brown to flame broiled.
It's a weird thing to be hitting a mid 40s job crisis. I'm not sure where to go next or keep treading water like I am. My peers played the long game and are much higher up now on TV shows. But my body and my life are telling me I can't make that kind of commitment. Need to stop and recharge. Need to go back to the gym and build myself up so I don't get burnt out that easily again.
Maybe after this nap though.
But damn, some jobs just slingshot you back into the old days.
I'm older. SO much older than when I started and in a space that old me would have envied, but it's amazing the outward ways that it shows on my face and body. My boss saw me on the 2nd week and noticed a giant new strip of grey in my hair. "Did we do that?" I mean... yeah. Doing your best to be a 24/7 asshole kinda does a number on people. And the weather was painful. Not only burned, but super burned. I just don't tan like I used to. There used to be a time I'd work in the sun and come back as dark as my dad, now it just goes from light brown to flame broiled.
It's a weird thing to be hitting a mid 40s job crisis. I'm not sure where to go next or keep treading water like I am. My peers played the long game and are much higher up now on TV shows. But my body and my life are telling me I can't make that kind of commitment. Need to stop and recharge. Need to go back to the gym and build myself up so I don't get burnt out that easily again.
Maybe after this nap though.