Gone Away Awhile 11/11
Title: Gone Away Awhile 11/11
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Word Count: ~8300
Rating/Warnings: NC-17 for sexual situations, MPREG, and medical/health problems
A/N: This story is based off a prompt by the amazing imogen_lily . Thank you so much for the gorgeous banner and for letting me play with this idea! I appreciate all the help and nudging sweetie!!! You are an amazing person to work with!
Summary: Jensen has it all…great job, lots of money, the love of his life…and NO kids, just the way he wants it. Everything seems perfect, until one night following a big fight Jensen comes home to find Jared has left, turning his world upside down. Four years down the line, he might finally find the answers to all his questions…in the form of two little boys who look a lot like him and Jared…
Jared paced around the room with his phone held to his ear as he tried to focus on what the person on the other side was telling him. It was starting to blur together and he felt like he was drowning in all the information he was being fed. Paige was fussing in the corner…either from picking up on his mood or just from being ignored. He couldn’t tell which. All he wanted to do was get away from it all for a minute and take a breath. Everything was becoming too much and the person just wouldn’t let up on the phone.
“Jared? Are you still there? Have you heard a word I’ve said?”
“Yeah…I’m still here detective,” Jared sighed in reply. His ran a shaking hand through his hair.
“Good…I know this is a lot to take in. And I’m sorry for bothering you with all this. I know you just had the baby and all…”
“It’s ok, Detective Weatherly,” Jared replied, more because he knew he needed to. “I need to know this.”
“Well…that’s all for now anyway. I’ll let you get back to your daughter. Call if you have any questions about this.”
“Thanks…I will.” With that, Jared hung up the phone and walked over towards Paige. She had moved on from fussing to crying softly, making Jared think she had picked up on his own frustrations. Paige still wasn’t much of a crier but she had become very perceptive, especially with her daddy.
Paige reached her arms up into the air for him. It momentarily brightened Jared’s spirits, but his traitorous mind kept going over everything Michael had told him on the phone. He couldn’t completely wrap his brain around everything and it was just giving him a headache. He shouldn’t be this upset; yet he was…
Paige fussed slightly and batted at his neck. He shushed her and rubbed at her back, hoping it would distract him more. It didn’t help as much as it should have.
“Jared?” Jensen yelled into the house as he walked in through the front door. “You home?”
“I-in h-here,” he called back, hating how his voice wavered. Paige started to cry against his chest.
“Hey,” Jensen greeted as he walked into the room. His brow furrowed at the sight of Jared. His hair was sticking up in all directions and he looked pale. Over the past few weeks, he had been gaining some color back and looking much healthier. Jensen knew Jared would always get sick easily, but he was doing well. Yet he didn’t look like it now…
“C-can you take Paige for me?” Jared asked, looking close to tears and Jensen had no clue why.
“Jay? You ok?”
“Just…please?”
Jensen gently took Paige in his arms, trying to calm her for a minute before turning back to Jared. When he looked up to try to talk to his husband, the younger man was no longer there. Jensen’s concern grew; especially when he heard the back door slam open and shut…it was pouring the rain outside.
“Ok, baby girl,” Jensen sighed. “How about you calm down for Pop so I can go see what’s wrong with Daddy huh? Please sweetheart.” He started rocking and swaying as he walked in hopes of calming his daughter down. The motions started to put her to sleep and she soon nodded off against his shoulder. Once he was sure that she was asleep, he set her down in her bouncer and tipped the edge so that it would move a little for her.
He took one last glance at his baby girl before walking towards the back door. Harley and Sadie stayed near Paige instead of walking off with him. He scratched them behind the ears. “Good dogs.”
Jensen rushed towards the back of the house but paused once he reached the door so that he could watch Jared for a moment. He was sitting on the porch steps despite the rain that was soaking him. His head was hung so that his wet hair fell down over his eyes. He was shaking, and Jensen couldn’t tell if he was crying or cold. With a sigh, Jensen slowly opened the door and stepped onto the porch. Jared didn’t notice him until he sat down on the steps beside him.
“Just me,” Jensen said softly as he rubbed Jared’s tense shoulders.
“Paige-“
“Is already asleep and in her bouncer.” Jared nodded but didn’t say anything. He just sat there quietly, leaning into Jensen a little. After a few minutes, Jensen was just as soaked as Jared. “You want to tell me what’s going on, babe?”
Jared hung his head a little more, staring at the mud the rain was causing near the steps. “Not really,” he sighed in reply.
“Jare, come on…I thought we were past this whole not talking things out thing we had going. We know it doesn’t end well. What’s going on? This isn’t like you.”
Jared bit his lip worriedly. “Weatherly called this morning…”
Jensen’s eyes widened and his heart started to race. “Shit…did something happen with the case? Is your dad being released? If that bastard thinks he-“
“He pled guilty on all charges concerning Paige and me…”
“That’s great, Jay!” Jensen squeezed his husband’s shoulder. Jensen’s smile waned as he saw the lack of excitement in Jared. “You’re not feeling guilty from all of it, are you?”
“He’s being transported to Washington in the morning to stand trial for another assault he did earlier this year.” Jared picked at the threads of a hole in his jeans, as he stayed silent for a moment. “He…he pled not guilty to that charge.”
“Oh…”
“Jen…he readily admitted all the shit he did to me, his own son, but wouldn’t own up to something he did to a complete stranger.” Jared ran his hand through is dripping hair.
“Jay-“
“Sorry…I know it shouldn’t matter. He’s going to jail for a long time either way. It’s just…sorry. Being stupid.”
Jensen massaged Jared’s neck and did his best not to comment on how cold the skin felt under his hands. “It’s not stupid Jare.”
“Yes it is,” he sighed. “I shouldn’t care. I should be happy that he pled guilty…that I don’t have to deal with a trial and all the shit with him.” He rubbed a hand over his face. “Just…I don’t understand…”
“Jared, I think it’s normal to feel this way. I mean-“
“No! I don’t understand him! How can he do this shit to me…to Jeff…for our whole lives and not even care? He just told the detectives that he beat the shit out of me when I was younger so he didn’t think that what he did a few months ago would be that bad! Said I was used to it. Just…”
“Shh…it’s ok, Jay.” Jensen pulled him closer. “He’s an asshole and you don’t deserve that.”
“I know that. I know I didn’t deserve it and I’m happy he’s going to get some jail time for it. He could have killed Paige. I just can’t believe he was that quick to say he did it…to say he beat his son and nearly killed his granddaughter. Weatherly said he didn’t even flinch. He owned up to it in details. I mean, after mom caved in it wasn’t like they didn’t have the proof. But still…to not even be bothered by the fact you nearly killed your granddaughter. I-”
“Come here.” Jensen hugged him and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “You’re not being stupid, babe. I know it has to hurt…to know how he felt about what he did.”
“But it shouldn’t get to me like this! I swore I was done with it! With letting him run things. I shouldn’t let it get to me.”
“Jay,” Jensen said softly as he pulled away to look Jared in the eyes. “You grew up with the guy. He was supposed to be your dad…supposed to take care of you and protect you. He didn’t do that. He just became bitter and he used it on you.”
Jared nodded against Jensen’s shoulder but didn’t say anything. After a few minutes, Jensen knew they couldn’t stay outside any longer. “Come on, let’s go back in and get you warmed up, ok?”
“You too…you’re cold t-too.”
“Yeah, but I’m not the one who had surgery…”
“Two months ago,” Jared sighed with a sad smile.
“Still…don’t want you sick.”
Jared leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks.”
The two walked back inside the house, dripping water along the way. Jensen wasn’t shivering nearly as bad as Jared was. Jared headed towards Paige despite it nonetheless, grabbing a kitchen towel to dry his hands and arms with at least.
“Hey baby,” he said softly as he walked up to Paige. He cast a quick glance at the dogs, which were still watching her intently. They were always good with the kids, even when they were babies like Paige. He knelt down next to her bouncer to check on her, even though it was obvious she was still sleeping.
“Jay,” Jensen came up behind him, pressing his hand against the younger man’s trembling back. “Go take a shower. I’ll watch over her. It will be ok.”
“Jen I-“
“It’s fine. You’re gonna get sick if you don’t.”
Jared nodded. “Fine,” he sighed.
“I’ll fix us something to eat. Is it just us or is Jeff bringing the twins back tonight?”
“No…they’re staying in town at Jeff’s new house. He doesn’t have any furniture yet so he lets them roller skate on the hardwood floors in the house for now.”
“No wonder they want to stay,” Jensen laughed.
In all seriousness, the twins were in love with their Uncle Jeff. When Jared had first introduced them, the twins’ shy side had come out in full force. Jeff looked like Jared and had the same caring personality that instantly turned that around for them. Now, Jeff and the boys were all but inseparable. They loved going on little outings with the man and having sleepovers. Jared was thrilled to have his big brother slotting back into his life so easily.
“Yeah,” Jared said with a small smile starting to form. “I’m just glad they are getting along with him so well. Always hoped he would get to be a part of their lives, you know?”
Jensen took a step towards Jared, his shoes squeaking from the water stuck inside them. He reached up and cupped Jared’s neck. “I’m happy you get that, babe. Really am.” He gave Jared a kiss on the cheek. “Now…go hop in the shower and change. How does broccoli Alfredo sound for dinner? And don’t give me that crap about you needing to lose more weight. You’ve already dropped what you gained with Paige.”
Jared smiled a little again. “Ok…that sounds good. I’ll go get changed. You should too.”
“I will.”
Jared nodded then headed up towards their bathroom to change. Paige fussed a bit as she started to wake. “Hey baby girl,” Jensen cooed towards his daughter. “Give Pop a minute to change and I’ll pick you up.” Jensen ran towards the laundry room off to the side of the house and grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. He dried off with a towel and changed out of his wet clothes quickly so he could go to his daughter.
“Here we go,” he sighed as he picked up Paige from her bouncer and placed her against his chest. “That’s all better, huh?” She cuddled close to his neck and he bounced a little as he walked towards the kitchen. The dogs followed at his heels. “Wanna watch while Pop cooks for your Daddy?”
He moved around the kitchen to gather up the pasta and materials to make the sauce. He made sure to keep one arm firmly on Paige while to picked up each ingredient and pan. He wanted to make Jared feel better if he could…
After a few minutes, he dragged the little bouncer into the kitchen so that he wouldn’t have Paige near the hot stove or any of the knives. But he still wanted to be close to her while he worked. As he stirred and boiled the noodles, he constantly looked over his shoulder to watch her. She was still a little sleepy eyed but was moving her arms a little, as if trying to catch something out in front of her.
Jensen loved watching her nowadays. He never thought seeing a tiny baby who was still too young to do much of anything would be so amazing to him. He had always thought babies were a nuisance…always too needy and too messy. Now, Paige was anything but…well she could be messy but he had learned to get over that really quickly.
The broccoli was steaming and the sauce simmering when Jared walked into the room. His eyes were still red rimmed and he looked far too pale for Jensen’s taste. But he had at least stopped shivering.
“Hey…will just be a few more minutes.”
Jared walked over to Paige and picked her up. He kissed her little cheeks and held her close. Thinking about his dad and everything had really brought out some bad memories. “No problem. Need to fix a bottle for her anyway.”
Jensen nodded towards the counter next to him. “Was letting it cool a little. Should be good for her now.”
“You’re the best,” Jared sighed in relief as he grabbed the bottle. He settled into one of chairs with Paige nestled in his lap. He checked the temperature of the formula before giving the bottle to her. She greedily sucked it down, gurgling happily. “Slow down…not going anywhere sweetheart.” Jared was thrilled she was as eager to eat as she was. He had been so worried she would have trouble gaining weight.
Jensen placed everything in a large bowl for Jared and grabbed a loaf of garlic bread from the over. He set it down in front of his husband, running his hand through his hair after afterwards. “I can do that so you can eat if you’d like.”
“Nah…I’m good.” He adjusted slightly so that he could pick up his fork, all the while never disturbing Paige from her feeding. He kept his eyes on her while he started eating. He never spilled a drop of formula or pasta.
“Dude…you’re incredible!” Jensen exclaimed.
“What?”
“You…if that was me, I would have the formula and the pasta all over me and Paige by now.”
Jared blushed. “I’m just used to this. Gotta remember, I used to have to do this with two babies at once.”
“Wish I could have seen that.”
Jared turned a little red again. “I’m sorry I made you miss-“
“Stop blaming yourself for everything, Jay. It’s the past. We screwed up. But we’ve gotten things together again and I’m really happy now. I love seeing you with Paige and the twins. It’s ok.”
Jared nodded and tried to smile, but Jensen could tell he was still upset about everything. The rest of the dinner was spent in silence. It wasn’t strained, but it was obvious Jared was thinking about something. Jensen just didn’t know if it was because of their conversation or everything with Gerry.
That night as he climbed into bed next to his husband he was determined to figure it all out though. Paige was already bathed and snuggled up in her bassinet across from their bed. Jared didn’t like the idea of her sleeping the nursery just yet, and Jensen was perfectly fine with that if he was honest.
“Hey you,” Jensen said softly and he slid under the covers next to Jared. He pulled his tense husband close until their foreheads were nearly touching.
“Hi…”
“So…what’s going on in that big brain of yours?”
Jared huffed. “Not that big…”
“But something is bothering you…”
“Maybe,” Jared sighed. He nuzzled his forehead against Jensen’s. “I’m fine…I promise.”
“No…what’s wrong? I know you are upset. Is this about your dad? Because you shouldn’t let yourself get worked up over what he does or thinks, babe. He’s the one who is going to be missing out on a lot of important things because of it all. Not you…”
“I know that. I don’t want to let it bother me…normally I can get past it quickly and I’m sure I will this time too. It just…it’s never easy when it happens. It just messes with me. Sorry.”
Jensen kissed Jared on the forehead and rubbed at his arms. “Nothing to be sorry for.”
Jared was quiet for a few beats and bit at his lip before speaking again. “You know…I used to worry I’d turn into him.”
“What?” Jensen asked in shock. “How could you think that? You’re nothing like him! You-“
“Mom used to say Dad was so different before she had me. She said I was a lot like him…the version of him she married I guess.”
“Jay-“
“When I was at the end of my pregnancy with the twins and I was really sick…I used to just lay in bed thinking that I would resent them for all of it. Was petrified I would end up like my dad did with us.”
Jensen didn’t know how to respond to that. “I…Jay you know I didn’t mean that when we were fighting back then?”
“I do…now. Not sure if that’s what set me thinking about that back then or not. I had some contact with my parents while I was pregnant. I wanted Jeff but didn’t want them to know where I was. So I was in contact with them in hopes of finding Jeff. I think…hearing him back then just messed with me. Like it is now.”
“Jared, you are nothing like Gerry. Gerry became who he became because of himself, not you, not Jeff. He made his choices just like you have made yours. You chose to be a good dad and to love those kids of ours. That was all you.”
“But that’s the thing, Jen. It was never an option…not loving them. I never felt that way. The moment I had the twins placed on my chest, I knew they were my world. It was never different. How could it be for him? How could he do that?”
“I don’t know,” Jensen sighed.
“I’m sorry, Jen. I normally don’t let it bother me like this. Just…hearing from Weatherly just brought it back today. I’m sorry I’m being a downer.”
“Come here.” Jensen tugged until Jared’s head was on his chest. “I’m glad you’re talking to me. Don’t worry. We’ll get through this. We’ll be ok.” He prayed he wasn’t just saying empty words…
***********
The following morning didn’t bring much change in Jared. He was still quiet and obviously thinking about stuff with his dad still. He did seem a little better, but not by much. Jeff picked up on it as soon as he brought the twins back.
“Daddy!” Remy and Dimitri squealed as they burst through the front door. They ran straight over to the couch where Jared was sitting with Paige.
“Hey guys…remember inside voice around your sister, ok?” They nodded and climbed up next to him. “Have fun with your Uncle Jeff?”
“Yeah!” Remy answered.
“He took us to the water park yesterday! They had elephants that squirted water out at us!”
“Wow,” Jared replied, trying to sound excited. “That does sound fun!” He ran his hand through Dimi’s unruly hair. “Did you already have breakfast?”
“Uncle Jeff took us to iHop for waffles!” Remy added enthusiastically.
“Nice,” Jared said, giving his brother a look for all the sugar in the syrup before going back to chatting up the kids as best as he could.
“Hey, Jeff?” Jensen said softly, trying to get his attention without Jared noticing.
“Yeah,” Jeff answered, turning towards his brother-in-law.
“Can we talk for a minute?”
Jeff nodded and stepped towards Jensen’s office with him. “So…what’s up with Jay?”
“That obvious, huh?” Jensen sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Kid never could keep things from me. Take it he’s not much better with you, huh?”
“For the most part…”
“So what’s going on with him?”
“Detective Weatherly called yesterday,” Jensen sighed. “Gerry pled guilty on all charges stemming from the incident with Jared and Paige.”
“That’s good though. I-“
“But,” Jensen continued, “he didn’t plead guilty to similar charges that were stemming from an incident with a complete stranger. He was willing to go into detail about what he did to his own son but wouldn’t own up to the same actions with a stranger.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah…”
“I’m not that surprised,” Jeff huffed. “Dad never really did care what others thought of how he was with us.”
“It gets worse…it brought up a lot of shit for Jay. He apparently used to think he would turn into Gerry when he was pregnant with the twins.”
“Son of a bitch,” Jeff muttered under his breath. “Dad turned into that because he got mixed up with drugs and God knows what else. He chose the things that made him that way.”
“I don’t know how much of that Jay knows…”
“Not as much as he probably needs to,” Jeff sighed. “I kept him sheltered as much as I could growing up. I mean, I didn’t want him to know his dad was an asshole. He didn’t need that.”
Jensen nodded, not knowing what to really say. He couldn’t imagine trying to shield one of his siblings from something like that for their childhood, especially when he was still a kid himself.
“If you take the kids, I’ll talk to him. Maybe I can help?”
“Worth a shot,” Jensen replied.
The two walked back out to the living room where the twins were still babbling on to Jared and playing with Paige’s tiny feet. The baby was taking it all in stride, not really phased by her big brothers.
“Hey guys,” Jensen greeted his sons.
“Pop!” Remy stood on the couch so that Jensen could pick him up.
“Sounds like someone had fun yesterday.”
“Yeah!”
“Look what Uncle Jeff got us!” Dimi said as he held up some goofy looking kids’ game.
“Wow! That looks fun! What do you say we go play a game of it up in your room?”
“What about Daddy?” Remy asked.
Jared was about to say he would go up as well but Jeff beat him to it. “How about you guys start with your Pop while I talk to your Daddy for a minute? That ok?”
The boys were still excited at the prospect of playing with Jensen so they agreed and followed him up, leaving Jared alone with Jeff and Paige.
“Shes’ getting big on you already,” Jeff said softly, picking up Paige from his brother’s arms. He kissed her on the forehead before bringing her to his chest. Jared fiddled with a string on his t-shirt now that his arms were empty. Jeff sighed. “Hey, bub, I think we need to talk…”
“Jen make you do this?”
“No…he told me about the stuff with Dad. That’s all.”
“I’m fine, Jeff. You don’t-“
“Yes I do. I think I need to clear up some things.”
“Nothing to clear up, bub. Dad was an ass after I was born…nothing else to it really.”
Something about the way he said that bothered Jeff. “Jay…how much do you remember about dad from when you were really little? Him ever being really nice or good with you?”
“Not a ton…mainly what Mom and you used to say about how he was before I was born.”
“Jay, he was good when you were little too. He did love you…both of us.”
“Jeff you don’t have to lie. I know-“
“Just let me finish, kiddo.” Jeff took one hand and squeezed Jared’s shoulder. “Dad was fine until he met some of his friends…those guys that were always at the house.”
“I remember them.”
“They got him into a lot of shit…his gambling…drugs…all that.” Jeff bit his lip. “Dad wasn’t that bad until he got into all that. Before it, he would come home from work, play with us, coo over you.”
“Jeff I-“
“I’m not lying to you. You know I wouldn’t do that.” Jared nodded and stopped interrupting. “Anyway…after he got into that, he lost his job and turned his anger onto us. At first, mom tried to stop him, but then she got depressed and mixed up in that stuff too. I didn’t want you to see it when we were kids. I wanted you to have a normal childhood. I never wanted you to think that Dad changed because you were born. I only told you those stories so you wouldn’t think Dad was all bad. I wanted you to see that he was an ok dad at one point. It just wasn’t for very long. After all that shit, I tried to keep you out of it. Didn’t want him to mess with you. But I guess me leaving kind of ruined that plan huh?”
Jared blinked at his brother and tried to not let his emotions show. “So…you’re saying you took the brunt of Dad’s bullshit for years and feel guilty when you got away from it?”
Jeff looked towards his lap, avoiding eye contact.
“Jeff, you did so much for me growing up! You’re only four years older than me! You shouldn’t have had to deal with that either. Don’t feel guilty for getting away from that. I…I should’ve gone with you. You wanted me to. I just…I don’t know…”
“You wanted to believe they weren’t all that bad,” Jeff sighed. “I did too at that age.”
“Maybe…but look where it got me…”
“You found the love of your life and have three pretty awesome kids…”
“Jeff-“
“And you are nothing like Dad ever was. I’ve watched you with all of them the past few weeks. And you know what? Dad was never as involved with us, even before he got into everything. You are nothing like him. I don’t care what Mom used to tell you. You’re a great dad…these kids are lucky to have you.”
Jared’s eyes looked wet and his throat was clogged with emotions. “Thanks,” he croaked out.
“I mean it kid. You have no idea how amazing you are with them or how much they adore you. Jensen too…”
“That means a lot, bub.” Jared rubbed at his face to stem off any tears. “So Jen passes big brother approval?” Jared asked with a small smirk.
Jeff laughed. “Think so. Didn’t exactly see any of your other boyfriends before him. But he seems to love you more than anything.”
“Yeah, I think he does.”
“Then that’s all that matters to me.”
“Me too…”
***********
“Sorry I’m running late,” Jensen sighed as he took his seat across from Danni in the small café. “I ran home to check in on Jared before I came.”
“Don’t apologize for that,” Danni said. “How’s he doing?”
“Ok…he’s physically fine. He’s just…this stuff with the trials and all that shit brought up some bad memories. His brother talked with him over the weekend and that helped him a lot. But he’s still a little upset. I wish I knew of a way to make him feel better.”
“I’d say you just being there is a big help.”
“Yeah…I just want to figure out a way to cheer him up, you know?” Jensen took a sip of his water and picked up the menu. “He just…he’s been doing so much for me. He had to deal with the pregnancy and then having Paige like he did. He deserves something nice.”
Danneel played with the straw in her glass for a minute while she thought of what to do. “Hmm…sounds like he could use a night out…just the two of you.”
“Maybe…”
“Why not take him to Misha’s new place and have your parents or Jeff watch the kids?”
“It doesn’t open until next week.”
“Yeah but you know him and Sam would let you have the place before it was officially opened.”
“True and he’d like that. Paige is doing so well…he’d be fine to do a night away.”
“Go out to a nice dinner there…then take him to a hotel in town or just back to your place. I think he’d like that.”
“I think so too. But…I still want to give him something.”
“Like a gift?”
“Yeah, but it’s always hard to pick something.”
“Jewelry…flowers…electronics…”
“No,” Jensen sighed. “I used to give him really expensive gifts when we were first married. He would appreciate them, but he always liked the smaller more thoughtful things. The big stuff would make him feel uncomfortable.”
“Can’t blame him, hun,” Danneel added.
“I know…I want something nice but nothing too major for him. I mean, I think his favorite gifts when we were first married were the photo albums and the dogs…things like-“
“Oh my God! I know what you can get him!” Danni grabbed her phone and began scrolling through it.
“Ok…this had better be good since that squeal just rendered me deaf in one ear…”
“Did not! Quit being a brat and look at this.” She shoved the phone at her friend. On the screen was a tiny white fluff ball of a puppy. “Isn’t he adorable?”
“What the hell is it?”
“It’s a cockapoo?”
“Um…bless you?”
“Shut up! It’s a cocker spaniel mixed with a poodle.”
“You do realize Harley could step on this thing and kill it right?”
“You know Harley wouldn’t hurt him!” Danni argued. “Look, my sister’s dog had the litter. This is the last one left…he’s the runt and no one wanted to buy him. She can’t take care of another dog so she’s going to have to get rid of him some way. I wanted to take him, but my building won’t allow animals. She’s planning on taking him to a shelter, Jen.”
“He’s too little for that,” Jensen replied as he looked up from the phone.
“Exactly! You should take him! His name is Icarus and he’s the sweetest little thing you’ve ever seen!”
“Can you please bring your voice back to decibels that the dog wouldn’t be able to hear?”
“Shut up…I’m just excited. I didn’t want to see him end up in a shelter…”
“I didn’t say I’d take him…”
“But you are going to,” Danneel smirked.
Jensen tried to glare at her but the little fur ball was pretty cute…
“Fine…I’ll take him. But if Harley steps on the runt it’s all on you sister.”
“Thank you so much!” Danneel reached across the table and wrapped her arms around Jensen. “You won’t regret it! Come on!” She grabbed her purse and put a few bills on the table for the drinks they had order.
“What about lunch?”
“We’ll run through a drive thru on the way!”
“The way to where?” Jensen huffed as stumbled up from his chair.
“My sister’s! We are going to pick up Icky!”
“Icky?”
“It’s his nickname…”
Jensen hung his head. He hoped he wouldn’t regret this.
***********
“Maybe we should stay in?” Jared sighed as he gathered up the things for Paige’s overnight trip to her grandparents. “It’s just-“
Jensen cut him off with a kiss. “She’ll be fine. And you could use a break…”
“But-“
“Please?” Jensen brought out his own puppy dog eyes as best as he could.
“Fine,” Jared relented. The doorbell rang downstairs. “Guess that’s them…”
“You would think that I was shipping the kid off to boarding school or something.”
Jared tried to glare, but Jensen could see the hints of a smile forming as well. “Just go get the door while I grab her stuff.”
Jensen laughed and pressed a kiss to Jared’s cheek before running down the stairs. “Hey, Mom,” he greeted as he opened the door.
“Hey baby.” Donna leaned up to give her son a kiss on the cheek. “You got everything ready for tonight?”
“Yep…all set. Misha and Sam have the restaurant all fixed up for us. Called in a favor down at the Broadbent Hotel so everything will be all set up there too by the time we leave.”
“Good…we’ll watch after the munchkins for you.”
“Nana!” Remy yelled as he ran down the stairs.
“No running, Rem!” Jared called down after his son. Remy slowed down but not by much. He all but launched himself at Donna.
“Hey you,” Donna said as she picked up her grandson and hugged him close. Dimitri came up next and hugged at her legs. “You boys ready to spend the night with us?”
They nodded enthusiastically in reply and started going on about everything that they wanted to do with their Nana and Granddad for the night.
“Hi Donna,” Jared greeted as he made it down the steps with Paige. Donna set Remy down so she could take the baby. She cooed over the little girl for a moment. “You know…if it’s too much trouble and all we can just-“
“Jared, don’t even think about finishing that sentence sweetheart,” Donna replied with a smile. “You two deserve a night to yourselves. We’ll be fine with the kids. Go…have fun! Besides, the boys want to go swimming with Alan at our house. They want to do it. It’s fine.” She reached up and cupped Jared’s cheek, giving him a smile. “If something comes up, we’ll call. You know that.”
“I know…I know you guys will be fine. It’s just…”
“It’s always hard leaving them for the first time. But you need this. Both you boys do.”
“Thanks Mom,” Jensen added, giving her a kiss on the cheek.
“Of course! We love taking the kids. You two better head out if you want to make your reservations.”
“It’s just Misha’s and-“
“And you two have a lot planned,” Donna continued with a wink.
Jared furrowed his brow but didn’t reply. Instead, he herded the children out to her car and got them all buckled into their car seats. Before he knew it, Donna was pulling out and heading to her home with his babies in tow and he was sitting in the car with Jensen. As much as he hated leaving his kids, he was enjoying the time with his husband away from them.
“You know it doesn’t make you a bad dad right?” Jensen said softly, as if reading his thoughts. He pulled the Impala into the parking lot next to Misha and Sam’s new place. “Having a night out without them…”
“I know…it’s just always hard the first time. Was worse when it was the boys actually. I had to leave them with Sandy one day so I could go back to school. I think I cried more than they did.”
“I bet,” Jensen sighed. He rubbed at Jared’s shoulder. “Come on…let’s enjoy the night. Mom will call if something comes up. But Paige is in perfect health now! Alona even said that the other day.”
Jared smiled. “Let’s go eat then…I’m really curious as to what all you’ve got planned for the night.”
Jensen just smirked in reply and hopped out of the Impala. He ran around to Jared’s side and opened the door. “Oh…you’re in for a night of surprises, baby.”
Once inside the restaurant, Misha treated them to the best steaks either had had before. Jensen hadn’t had the chance to try any of Misha’s cooking in the past, but he was savoring every bite. Jared was too if the little happy moans were any indication. They were all starting to get to Jensen if he was honest.
By the time desserts were served, Jensen wanted nothing more than to move everything on to the hotel and the other surprises that were waiting there. He tried to pay Misha for the meal, but the man refused, stating that he needed to have a test run anyway and appreciated them doing it.
Jensen drove a little faster than he meant to in order to reach the hotel quickly. The place was nowhere near as fancy as the ones in Dallas, but it was perfect for what he wanted for the night. It was small yet elegant. The staff was sweet, catering to his every whim over the past few days of preparation.
“Wow,” Jared gasped as they entered the lobby. The place was more like an old rustic cabin on the inside. It wasn’t cheesy or tacky, just beautiful.
“Knew you’d like it. Wait ‘til you see the room,” Jensen whispered in his ear, causing the younger man to shiver.
They made their way up the elevator and to their room within seconds. “Close your eyes,” Jensen instructed.
“Jen-“
“Please?”
Jared shook his head but closed his eyes anyway. He took Jared’s hand and led him into the room. Soft music filtered through from a radio in the corner. Candles flickered from the tables. But the real surprise was sitting in the middle of the bed.
“Open you eyes,” Jensen instructed softly as he closed the door. A small yip echoed above the music, making Jared smile before he open his eyes.
“Jen…”
“Open your eyes already,” he grumbled around a laugh.
Jared obeyed and opened them. His smile grew as his eyes settled on the white fluff ball. He stepped over to the bed where the puppy’s tiny body was vibrating with excitement. “Jensen?” He sat town on the bed. The dog tried to jump out of the basket he was confined to but the sides were just too tall for him to jump over.
“Um…surprise?” Jensen smiled and rubbed at the back of his neck.
Jared picked up the puppy. It licked at his fingers and squirmed against his larger hands. “Hey there little guy.” He ran his fingers over the puppy’s head. “What is he?”
“Cockapoo,” Jensen mumbled.
“A what?”
“Cockapoo,” Jensen said louder. “It’s a cocker spaniel and poodle mix. Name’s Icarus.”
He yipped at the mention of his name. “Icky huh? Hey buddy.” Jared hugged the dog to his chest and kissed his fluffy head. “Where’d he come from?”
Jensen sat down next to him on the bed. “Danni’s sister…he was the last in her litter. She was going to take him to the shelter and Danni asked if I’d take him for her instead.” Jensen scratched under Icarus’s white chin. “I couldn’t imagine a dog that isn’t going to be more than fifteen pounds fully grown surviving a shelter…granted I’m not sure he’ll survive Harley.”
“Harley will baby the little guy,” Jared laughed. “So he’s ours now?”
“Yeah…I mean…if you don’t want him we can-“
Jared kissed Jensen on the lips. “He’s cute…just like his pop.”
“Oh you are too funny,” Jensen replied sarcastically.
Jared smirked in return. “I love him. Thank you.” Jared’s fingers fiddled with the collar. “But I think this might be too big for him.” Jared went to inspect the collar and found the little metal tag had an inscription. He read it and gasped in shock. “Jen…”
Jensen took the puppy from Jared’s hands so he could hold onto them. “What do you say?”
Jared read the inscription again…
“Will you marry me again?”
“I-I’m hoping you mean you and not the dog…”
Jensen rolled his eyes and squeezed Jared’s hand. “Of course…what do you say? Figured after everything it would be nice…to do a vow renewal on our anniversary in September. What do you say? Marry me again,” he said with his lips ghosting over Jared’s ear.
Jared shifted so that he could kiss Jensen passionately. “Yes,” he answered. “Of course I will, Jen!” He attacked Jensen’s mouth again, pressing his body closer. Icarus yipped between them, causing them to pull apart a little. Jared smiled down at the puppy again. “Hey Jen…is there somewhere we can put the little guy for a bit?”
“He has a huge kennel. I have it in the bathroom right now. Has some food and water in it for him along with a few toys.”
“Good…because I don’t really think we’ll want him to see what I have in store for you…”
Jensen’s mouth ran dry at the words. “Ok Icky…think you have to go away for a few. I hope you understand.” He carried the dog into the bathroom and got him settled. The dog whined, prompting Jensen to sit in there for a second until the dog calmed down. He could tell the puppy already had him whipped.
After a few minutes he was able to hurry back into the bedroom and to Jared. “He should be good for-WOW!” Jensen gasped as Jared came into view. His husband had already shed himself of his clothes and was lying across the bed, obviously waiting on Jensen. His stomach was almost as toned as it had been before Jared had gotten pregnant. The summer sun had taken the sickly pale color away from Jared’s skin and replaced it with a nice tanner shade.
“That’s always a nice reaction,” Jared said with a shy smile. He had a slight blush creeping across his cheeks.
“Always nice to come into a room to find my hot husband naked…”
Jared barked out a laugh at that. “Well…it would be nicer if you joined me over here…especially since we haven’t really done this since I got the all clear from Al…”
Jensen nodded in agreement and quickly tore off his clothes. Once they were all piled on the floor next to Jared’s, he hopped up on the bed next to Jared. He slid his hands down Jared’s back and onto his bare ass. Jared turned over so that he was lying on his back. Jensen leaned down and kissed Jared. Jared’s hands came up and settled at Jensen’s neck for a moment before traveling lower. He toyed with Jensen’s growing desire for a moment.
“Mmm,” Jensen moaned into Jared mouth. He adjusted so that he too could touch his husband better. He began prepping Jared, being extra careful since it had been awhile.
“Not gonna break, babe,” Jared sighed breathlessly. “Need…you…now…”
The words went straight through Jensen and drove him crazier. His hands were shaking with anticipation as he rubbed at Jared’s hips. He looked up into Jared’s eyes as he plunged inside.
“God,” Jared groaned, his head falling back against the pillows as Jensen filled him. “Nuh…damn…need…you! Please…move!”
Jensen reached in between them to touch Jared as he snapped his hips forward. He wanted to be slow and careful, but the little noises Jared was making underneath him made that impossible. “God, Jay!”
Jared clenched around him and pulled him deeper, eliciting more happy moans from Jensen. His pace became more erratic and needy. Jared was writhing against the bed and his fingers dug into Jensen’s back. Pleasure built within each of them, threatening to overcome them until it finally did.
Both their spines began to tingle until the feeling shot through them as they began to climax. Jared bore down hard against Jensen as it hit, sending Jensen over the edge as well. His hips took on a mind of their own as his was lost to the feeling of how good it felt to have Jared like this.
After a few moments, Jensen was able to think clearly and pulled out. He flopped down next to Jared, breathing hard. “Damn…”
“Yeah,” Jared sighed, just as breathless. They were sweaty and happy. “Wow…”
“Could say that again,” Jensen sighed.
“Hmm…or,” Jared flipped up so that straddled Jensen, “we could do other thing again.” He rubbed down onto Jensen as he kissed him. Jensen moaned and bucked up into him, making Jared laugh. Without giving Jensen time to say anything, he slotted up with his husband until he Jensen was inside him once more.
“Shit!” Jensen cursed, bucking up again without meaning to. “Gonna…kill me…here.”
Jared moved so that Jensen slid up and down inside of him, hitting him just right. “Mmm…what a way to go though right?” He leaned down and attached his mouth to Jensen’s once again. He ran his hands up and down Jensen’s hips before moving his own to create friction.
Jensen grabbed onto Jared and urged him on, harder and faster. They didn’t speak aside from mumbled moans of encouragement. They fell into a rhythm once more, driving the other crazy. They tried to make it last longer, and managed to succeed a little. Within minutes though, they were calling the other’s name, back arching.
After they had caught their breaths, Jensen pulled Jared in close. “Think we need to get re-engaged more often.”
~Epilogue~
All their family and friends sat in the decorated ranch yard. Donna, Mack, Gen, Sandy, Sam, and Danni had outdone themselves, turning the normally kid destroyed grass into a thing of beauty. A handcrafted arch stood at the end, decorated with ivy and lilies. The bright September sun shined down onto Jared and Jensen from where they stood underneath it.
Chris and a few of his buddies played music off to the side as the kids started down the makeshift aisle. The small crowd muttered various awws at the three of four of them. Remy and Dimitri were sporting little suits. They pulled a decorated wagon behind them that had various pillows and blankets in it to support nearly three-month-old Paige. Behind them, their cousin Alli threw flower petals up and down the isle.
While Jared and Jensen were already standing at the front, they wanted to still allow the kids to be involved. It was definitely worth it. The boys were excited by the attention while Alli loved being able to “play” with the flower petals. Paige was her usual mellow self, taking it all in stride.
Alli ran to her mommy once she made it down to the end of the aisle and climbed into her lap. The boys each hurried to one of their fathers, hugging their legs tightly. Paige started fussing now that she was alone in the wagon and surrounded by everyone. Jared sent Jensen a smile before reaching down and picking her up. She calmed once she was in her daddy’s arms almost instantly.
The boys continued to hold onto Jared and Jensen’s legs as the preacher went through the ceremony. Paige never fussed a bit. She just looked up and them with her big greens eyes. Half way through, Alli climbed down from her seat despite Mack’s best efforts, so that she could stand up front with her cousins as well.
Things may not have gone exactly as planned, but with all the kids involved, they hadn’t expected it to. It didn’t matter; to Jared and Jensen it was the perfect way to renew their vows.
When they leaned in to kiss, the boys muttered yuck while Alli giggled behind her little hands. Paige tried to reach up and grab Jensen.
Again…it was perfect…
“Hey,” Jared said softly, taking a seat next to Jensen at their table after the ceremony had end. The sun was setting up in the sky while various couples danced around on the dance floor. He leaned over and gave his husband a kiss on the lips.
“Hey yourself. Where’s Paige?”
“Jeff took her. Think he’s out on the dance floor with her. She seems to like the music.”
“That’s my girl,” Jensen laughed.
Jared’s smile faded for a minute as he reached into his suit jacket for an envelope. “Um…here…” He handed it over to Jensen. “It’s…kind of my gift to you.”
Jensen’s brow furrowed and he leaned forward to take the envelope. He ripped it open and pulled out the letters. It was actually legal documents. “Jay…are you serious?”
Jared nodded shyly, taking Jensen’s hand in his.
“I…wow,” Jensen gulped as he read them over.
“I thought it was time they had their names fixed correctly. I should have done awhile back.” Jensen read over the papers once again. His heart thumped loudly. “Are you ok with this?”
“Am I ok? You’re changing the twins’ names so that they have Ackles tacked on at the end.” Jensen attacked Jared’s mouth for a minute. “Of course I’m ok with this! Thank you!” He started to kiss Jared once more, bringing his hand up to pull Jared in closer. “What if we take this up-“
“Daddy! Pop!” the twins both yelled as they ran up to their fathers. They were oblivious to the fact that they were breaking a moment.
“Cake!” Remy exclaimed excitedly. “Uncle Misha brought out the cake!”
“He said we have to wait on you to eat it. Can we please go get some, Daddy? Please Pop?” Dimi added, bringing out his puppy eyes.
Jensen and Jared pouted inwardly, wishing they could have continued what that kiss had started. But they knew they’d have time later.
“Please,” the twins pleaded, tugging on their dad’s pants legs.
“Alright,” Jared laughed.
“We’re coming. Go on and tell Misha to get things set up.”
“YAY!” They took off running towards the cake again.
Jensen rubbed Jared’s thigh, squeezing it slightly. “You know, we probably have a few minutes to ourselves…”
Jared looked up to see the twins bouncing around near the cake. “If we want the cake to fall on our sons because they are vibrating near the table…”
Jensen huffed out a laugh. “Guess we better go huh?’
They stood up. Jensen started to walk towards the cake table but Jared grabbed his arm. He tugged on Jensen until he came close enough to kiss. “We’ll finish this later…”
Jensen liked the idea of that and nodded against Jared’s forehead. In the distance, he heard Misha trying to keep the kids away from the huge cake, making him laugh at their antics. A year ago, he never would have dreamed of being here with Jared and the kids. He would have called anyone who even suggested the idea completely crazy. Now…now he wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else. Watching his kids bounce in excitement and look up at him with all that love…
Yeah…this was definitely the dream now…
THE END
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A/N: Thank you all so much for going on yet another journey with one for my stories! You have no idea how much I appreciate all the comments and support you have given me, especially imogen_lily who encouraged me to take on this bunny when I didn’t think I could.