#NeverFB volume 2
My mother was very opposed to the display of strong emotion. I suspect that her parents weren't very good about keeping their battles to themselves, before they split. Her father doted on her, and when Grandma decided he wasn't contributing enough to their welfare (he wasn't, apparently, very reliable about alimony in days when women REALLY didn't make living wages because they were supposed to be somebody's dependent, not the head-of-family), she cut off his access to his children. Mom didn't see her father again until after I was born, when he showed up on her doorstep.
Anyway, she actively discouraged emotional conduct, and modeled that so well, I only saw her crying three times in my life: once after her father died, once after she had run over our dog, and once when she'd been having an argument with my father, and he'd driven off in anger. That was it--anything else was kept to herself. She didn't do effusive, or cutesy, or loud cheering. She was the first person I knew who didn't support "go hug Auntie whether you want to or not." She was still a marvelous mother, despite lack of aptitude in the accepted sense. We never lacked for anything we needed, including the feeling of being loved, but for her, it was a labor of duty as well as love. She ALWAYS did The RIght Thing. I will always admire that about her.
Obviously, I absorbed those lessons, and still think she was right about this: emotions are important guides to what's going on, but they are rotten guides to what to DO about it. People should use calm judgement to guide their actions.
Oh, BOY, does that one bite me! The Mouse having a hissy fit is an ugly sight, because she is lost inside something she doesn't know how to stop, not even long enough to hear the "HEY! WAITAMINNIT! You need to shut up and listen, dammit!" whether it comes from her or someone else watching the drama.
And then, I DO hear it, and have to crawl away and hide in a hole. Again.