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[mothers]

these are my confessions
tell me a secret about me or you or someone else. or just tell me something on your mind. anon is on ip is off. post as many times as you want.

Comments

[anonymous]

I have so many things I want to let out and say. So many that it's painful, and they make me worry incessantly. A lot of these I hold back because I worry about coming off as passive-aggressive or something of the like (and that's just not cool), and all of them I hold back because I don't want to annoy/anger you. Sometimes I ask myself if I may have become obsessed with you because the thought "Does she hate me? Do I annoy her? I just want to have fun with her and for her to have fun with me." is always on my mind. I get so paranoid that I find myself interpreting your innocent teasing as out-right bullying and then I get angry at myself for even thinking that about you. Sometimes I think "I wish she would just be absolutely honest with me" but then I get scared of what the results might be and then I get angry at myself for always dwelling on the subject and for even thinking of these things at all in the first place.

Sometimes I wonder if I might have a crush on you (though it wouldn't be the type of crush I would even think about trying to pursue, since I know you're straight and I don't generally like other girls that way either). When I think about it, I get angry at myself again because I feel like a creepy stalker, always worrying about what you really think of me. I annoy myself with the thought that I may annoy you. Hell, all of this probably isn't helping at all, either. In a nutshell, what I want to get at is that when we're together, it feels like you're not enjoying yourself. Like you're forcing yourself. When this worry starts plaguing me, I stop enjoying myself, and then it isn't fun for anyone anymore. I want to be reassured that everything is okay, that I'm worrying over nothing again, and be more confident about... well, everything.

I'm sorry if this is rather out of the blue (and public, at that). I would have prefered to wait until the next honesty/anon meme, but this has already been gnawing at me for weeks and I felt the urgent need to let it out. So... I think that basically covers it.

And again... I'm sorry. For suddenly bringing this up, for being an annoyance, a poor friend, for anything I might have said or done that insulted or hurt you, and everything else.

[mothers]

ah.. wow. i'm.. so at a loss of words right now. first of all, i'd like to apologize that i've made you feel so paranoid or insecure or anything. i honestly had no idea someone felt this way at all. i'm sure whoever you are, i truly enjoy your company & your kindness & friendship from the bottom of my heart.

i'd like to know what i can do to help reassure you that i sincerely feel this way, but i.. have no idea who you are haha :[ you're probably not comfortable with letting me know yet but please know that i am grateful for you no matter what. please don't think yourself as a hindrance to me. i love all my friends & i really don't feel annoyed with them or have ill feelings for any of them

b-but again, i'm sorry for causing such confusion. skdjhf i hope i can help fix that somehow

[anonymous]

Mm. That alone makes me feel a little better, and I'm glad that you didn't take it badly. Thank you.

Perhaps eventually I'll work up the courage to reveal myself, but now is not yet the time. Maybe someday.

[mothers]

please, you don't need to thank me. i'm seriously sorry to have put you through that

& you don't need to worry about revealing yourself. whenever you're ready is fine by me. just know i'll always be here for you no matter what, okay? if you feel unsure about anything again you can comment here or something. i'll come running