I hate life's curveballs
In the course of one year, we moved to a new city, he got a new car, I had been warned that I would lose my job if I didn't bring my perfomance up, I got pregnant, we ended up with two new dogs, god knows how many lizards, his nina lost her job, drama ensued, I lost my job, I gave birth, have debt up my ass, and somehow manged to help him out his HIS bills, but he can't do that for me.
Today is just hell. My wallet is missing, so there are my SSN, driver's license, and bank card. Not to mention possibly my other bank account. I have no idea where it is. Last place I remember having it was in Emily's diaper bag. It's in one of three places: the park-god forbid, his parents' house, or somewhere in this crap of a room. Emily has thrush and we have 0$ to pay for her medication, and I want to get that ASAP because it will get worse and guess who has to suffer with her....YES, ME! I have no doctor and need to set up an appointment ASAP. I need to drive into L.A. for an interview and have twenty dollars for gas, but oh yeah, I need to get my daughter's medication. I have no unemployment because it's now that those fuckers decide "Hey, let's not give extensions unless they REALLY need it" ALTHOUGH UNEMPLOYMENT IS FUCKING SKY ROCKETING AGAIN. So I have a phone interview at a number taht is non-existant because the damned bill was too high and I had to cancel it, but I have to notify them of the number change only to discover that the house phone is not charged and the other two phones are missing! Let's not forget to mention that I have yet to take a shower because I'm tearing the room apart searching for the damned wallet I need because I can't get the money out of my bank without my ID and SSN, and oh yeah! My insurance is stalled because I COULDN'T PAY IT DUE TO LACK OF MONEY! Not to mention I still have to find a way to pay bills and rent and my car payment by the end of the month. I'm tempted to sell my car, but Can't because ALL THE FUCKIN' JOBS ARE AT LEAST AN HOUR AWAY FROM HOME! Oh and those fuckers dont' want to hire me because of "Lack of experience" although I meet all their goddamned requirements. And fuck head over here has the damned nerve to tell me not to freak out? I think I have every right to be freaking out right now, considering I may be losing my CAR! Not to metion that I have no one NO ONE who can help me with that this month and my sister, who is fucking co-signer, is calling me constantly going "You can't miss a payment, you just can't, because I'm already in debt." Yeah, but you're the one with the damned job assface. You're not the one that doesn't have the money to buy diapers. I'm just lucky I don't have to buy formula. Not to mention my roommate thinks it's hilarious to wait until the dogs have NO FOOD to say "Hey, dogs need food." And somehow I manage to get the funds to feed them.
Oh and let's not forget that along with my sister going "Pay FOR YOUR CAR" ass face over here is on my ass about "You need a job." Yeah, but an 8$ an hour job isn't good enough for him, although it's all I can most likely get right now. I am fucking stressing out so much. I'm sick of hearing him asking me for money and then somehow coaxing me into thinking it's okay because "I'll pay you back next paycheck, I promise" although I know I'm going to hear "I can't on my paycheck" because it's too small, then freaking hearing "Why don't you trust me?" I'm fucking' giving him money I don't have. How much more trust does he want?
I hate this so much.
Today is just hell. My wallet is missing, so there are my SSN, driver's license, and bank card. Not to mention possibly my other bank account. I have no idea where it is. Last place I remember having it was in Emily's diaper bag. It's in one of three places: the park-god forbid, his parents' house, or somewhere in this crap of a room. Emily has thrush and we have 0$ to pay for her medication, and I want to get that ASAP because it will get worse and guess who has to suffer with her....YES, ME! I have no doctor and need to set up an appointment ASAP. I need to drive into L.A. for an interview and have twenty dollars for gas, but oh yeah, I need to get my daughter's medication. I have no unemployment because it's now that those fuckers decide "Hey, let's not give extensions unless they REALLY need it" ALTHOUGH UNEMPLOYMENT IS FUCKING SKY ROCKETING AGAIN. So I have a phone interview at a number taht is non-existant because the damned bill was too high and I had to cancel it, but I have to notify them of the number change only to discover that the house phone is not charged and the other two phones are missing! Let's not forget to mention that I have yet to take a shower because I'm tearing the room apart searching for the damned wallet I need because I can't get the money out of my bank without my ID and SSN, and oh yeah! My insurance is stalled because I COULDN'T PAY IT DUE TO LACK OF MONEY! Not to mention I still have to find a way to pay bills and rent and my car payment by the end of the month. I'm tempted to sell my car, but Can't because ALL THE FUCKIN' JOBS ARE AT LEAST AN HOUR AWAY FROM HOME! Oh and those fuckers dont' want to hire me because of "Lack of experience" although I meet all their goddamned requirements. And fuck head over here has the damned nerve to tell me not to freak out? I think I have every right to be freaking out right now, considering I may be losing my CAR! Not to metion that I have no one NO ONE who can help me with that this month and my sister, who is fucking co-signer, is calling me constantly going "You can't miss a payment, you just can't, because I'm already in debt." Yeah, but you're the one with the damned job assface. You're not the one that doesn't have the money to buy diapers. I'm just lucky I don't have to buy formula. Not to mention my roommate thinks it's hilarious to wait until the dogs have NO FOOD to say "Hey, dogs need food." And somehow I manage to get the funds to feed them.
Oh and let's not forget that along with my sister going "Pay FOR YOUR CAR" ass face over here is on my ass about "You need a job." Yeah, but an 8$ an hour job isn't good enough for him, although it's all I can most likely get right now. I am fucking stressing out so much. I'm sick of hearing him asking me for money and then somehow coaxing me into thinking it's okay because "I'll pay you back next paycheck, I promise" although I know I'm going to hear "I can't on my paycheck" because it's too small, then freaking hearing "Why don't you trust me?" I'm fucking' giving him money I don't have. How much more trust does he want?
I hate this so much.