random subjects
i see that i have neglected to update this thing for four weeks. i can't really even remember what happened yesterday, let alone in the last four weeks. so, i'll be random.
the closing on the house was 8/1. the old house was finally, finally, FINALLY hauled out of here on 8/31. some older man bought it. he was here when they were getting ready to haul the thing away, snapping pictures and running all over my newly-seeded lawn. when i told him that the carpets needed to be replaced, he said it didn't matter to him, because he has a couple of big dogs and he's just going to duct-tape the carpet together where it has fallen apart. i was like, "um...okay, then...bye-bye."
i just paid my first mortgage payment. i have never been so happy to pay a bill in all my life. when i received it in the mail, it finally felt like this whole thing was real, suddenly.
i am EVER so happy to have all the fucks who were messing around in my life OUT of my life. that especially includes the home dealership company. it does NOT include my mortgage guy, Rick, who kept me sane throughout the whole thing. i owe him a letter of thanks.
my puppy is the most awesome dog on the face of the earth, for me. she bites a lot (she's teething) and can be so friggin' active, running around the house like a maniac, but she is probably one of the most wonderful things that has ever happened to me in my life.
i just made every last reservation for my mom and me to go to arizona in november. so we are all set with that.
i am jealous that justin is getting to see travis. but then again, i've seen him way more many times than justin, so i guess i owe him at least one.
my work life is unbelievable. i am probably working with THE craziest set of families i have ever worked with in my entire seven year career as a social worker. i have been very, very tired in re: to them over the past four weeks. every time i take a new family on, they are worse than the one prior. i am muddling through.
i love my house. it is hard to leave it. i am sure i will have VERY mixed feelings/insane emotions in november when i leave the house AND the dog. my grandmother is coming to babysit, and my best friend Cathi will come and play "Auntie" again, so Stella should be fine. i probably won't be, all week, as far as she is concerned.
this afternoon i said "NO" to working, put a blanket on the ground on my brand new lawn, and lay out there in the sun with stella for over an hour. i have not done that all spring/summer. Spring/summer was a blur to me. i don't remember anything except extreme anxiety and hopelessness juxapositioned with extreme anticipation and hopefulness.
the other night, i dreamed i gave travis a bottle of hair conditioner, and he laughed and laughed until i thought he would throw up.
i have actually been writing in my actual journal more recently, mostly writing assignments i give myself. i am becoming more interested in buddhism. i am considering going back to school in 2008, probably to my alma mater, Goddard in Vermont, in the low residency program. we'll see.
my bedroom has an india-native american-buddhist theme. it hasn't been hard to balance those three elements. i am finally, finally, FINALLY feeling settled. it feels like i have been living in this house forever, and yet every day i find something new i love about it. it is such a blessing.
the closing on the house was 8/1. the old house was finally, finally, FINALLY hauled out of here on 8/31. some older man bought it. he was here when they were getting ready to haul the thing away, snapping pictures and running all over my newly-seeded lawn. when i told him that the carpets needed to be replaced, he said it didn't matter to him, because he has a couple of big dogs and he's just going to duct-tape the carpet together where it has fallen apart. i was like, "um...okay, then...bye-bye."
i just paid my first mortgage payment. i have never been so happy to pay a bill in all my life. when i received it in the mail, it finally felt like this whole thing was real, suddenly.
i am EVER so happy to have all the fucks who were messing around in my life OUT of my life. that especially includes the home dealership company. it does NOT include my mortgage guy, Rick, who kept me sane throughout the whole thing. i owe him a letter of thanks.
my puppy is the most awesome dog on the face of the earth, for me. she bites a lot (she's teething) and can be so friggin' active, running around the house like a maniac, but she is probably one of the most wonderful things that has ever happened to me in my life.
i just made every last reservation for my mom and me to go to arizona in november. so we are all set with that.
i am jealous that justin is getting to see travis. but then again, i've seen him way more many times than justin, so i guess i owe him at least one.
my work life is unbelievable. i am probably working with THE craziest set of families i have ever worked with in my entire seven year career as a social worker. i have been very, very tired in re: to them over the past four weeks. every time i take a new family on, they are worse than the one prior. i am muddling through.
i love my house. it is hard to leave it. i am sure i will have VERY mixed feelings/insane emotions in november when i leave the house AND the dog. my grandmother is coming to babysit, and my best friend Cathi will come and play "Auntie" again, so Stella should be fine. i probably won't be, all week, as far as she is concerned.
this afternoon i said "NO" to working, put a blanket on the ground on my brand new lawn, and lay out there in the sun with stella for over an hour. i have not done that all spring/summer. Spring/summer was a blur to me. i don't remember anything except extreme anxiety and hopelessness juxapositioned with extreme anticipation and hopefulness.
the other night, i dreamed i gave travis a bottle of hair conditioner, and he laughed and laughed until i thought he would throw up.
i have actually been writing in my actual journal more recently, mostly writing assignments i give myself. i am becoming more interested in buddhism. i am considering going back to school in 2008, probably to my alma mater, Goddard in Vermont, in the low residency program. we'll see.
my bedroom has an india-native american-buddhist theme. it hasn't been hard to balance those three elements. i am finally, finally, FINALLY feeling settled. it feels like i have been living in this house forever, and yet every day i find something new i love about it. it is such a blessing.