the 4th
Throughout last weekend I feel as if I've been retracing, retracking, and rehashing family visits of the past two decades. I keep thinking that soon I will have had the last of these similar scripted visits. The next time I must be married, not present at all, or at least playing a role other than that of the oldest child of my dad's family. Once I am married, I know the times spent there will be fresher and more palatable, because I will finally be seen as the way I already see myself. No matter how much I love my family and my relatives, my relationship with Mark is more significant and central to my life than my relationship is as daughter or sister.