Happy Birthday to Me
SO yesterday was my birthday which would have been all well and good if it wasn't for the fact that I feel like I am fucking falling apart physically. Thank God it's only physically though given that I have more of a tendency to go to hell in a hand basket emotionally.
At any rate on Sunday I felt fine, nothing more than the usual aches and pains but when I woke up Monday morning I could barely stand from the pain in my left leg, which I can only attribute to a pinched sciatic nerve. So here I am on Wednesday and while it has gotten somewhat better, I can now lie down with a minimum of pain and eventually find a comfortable position from which to fall asleep, it continues to be especially painful to sit down for any length of time. This is a problem since all I do at work is sit in front of a computer bank and dispatch policemen all day.
I guess I am really more pissed about the fact that this has happened when it has. It's like my body is taunting me with all the physical ailments that go with age to some extent. And well I don't like it.
Things I want to do this year of life:
(1) Bowl a 125 average.
I anticipate that this will be harder than it used to be since after my stroke bowling has become harder for me to do well. My arm doesn't seem to be able to carry as much weight as it was did and my grip has definitely slackened. Also my legs, the right more than the left, get really tired easily and so it is pretty hard to get through the three games that are bowled on league night.
(2) Visit New York for 2 weeks.
Realistically I probably won't be able to go for more than a week but a girl can hope. And of course when I am in NYC I want to reconnect with old friends like Jennifer, Mark, Scott, Tommy all the people I used to hang out with in GLYNY.
(3) Get back into the habit of writing.
Okay so I really only write fanfic but I really enjoy it so why shouldn't I continue to do it. Well the horrid case of writer's block that I have been living with for the last 2-3 years might explain it quite a bit.
(4) Buy an IPod.
Hey everyone else has one so why shouldn't I. Also it will put me that much closer to actually getting a cell phone, something I have steadfastly refused to do since my ex-girlfriend cancelled our contract more than 2 years ago.
(5) Try to lose some weight.
This has less to do with body image and more to do with my health. The stroke scared me. Maybe not enough to make me completely stop smoking (I can easily give up cigarettes but weed has proven to be more difficult though in my defense on that issue I have only really fallen off the proverbial wagon less than a handful of times in the past year). I have however begun to eat a somewhat healthier diet than I have in ages. More grains, nuts and fruits and less pasta, bread and potatoes. I never really cooked with salt nor do I salt my food to often. I have discovered that I like grits too with just a hint of jelly in them or with melted cheese. Never thought I would care for them actually but my mother in law has managed to overcome my inate mistrust of them .
God knows there are other things but they are just not coming to my head right now. No doubt once I sign off my brain will refuse to shut off. Such is life.