(no subject)
What a busy day! Today I got up early and went to meet Ben, the German I met on the Mekong Tour. We wandered around a bit and took pictures of things he wanted to see for his last day. We even made it to the Temple I wanted to see.
I encountered another side to Vietnam that I was bound to see, but hoped I didn't have to see it this soon. At the temple they forced incense into our hands and a wreathe of flowers to put on the altar. I knew they would make us pay for it, but we walked through the temple without any sort of harassment until the end. They came to the other side and demanded 100.000 dong for the incense, each. I told him it was too much. He took the 500.000d out of my hands, gave me back 200.000 and scooted away before I had a chance to protest or count. I went back up to him and told him he didn't give me enough, he grudgingly gave me 100.000 more. I tried to politely and not so politely demand the other 100.000 he owed me but he feigned ignorance. So ultimately he got away with 10 $ for incense. Granted, I know that's not a lot of money, but here that can go a long way and I only had that 500.000 left for the day. I walked away pissed and kind of hurt, but really, there's nothing more I could do.
Anyways, no use having that ruin your day, so I didn't.
We also went to the Zoo, which was beautiful in terms of the gardens, but the animals were kept in smaller enclosures than they should have been (which i find true for most zoos.) The tigers looked thin and like their back legs had been broken and had never fully healed. Most of the animals in general looked sad, in particular the elephants. They had a sentience in them that I found a little more disturbingly present than most of the other animals. Maybe it's just me searching for it.
The War Remnants museum was more depressing but for very different reasons. They lead you in with the American B52 bombers and various other combat machinery and a ground floor filled with the basic "Americans as well as the entire world opposed this war" agenda. However, the next two floors were filled with photos of the most horrific atrocities that Americans had committed during the war. We all remember the picture of the naked child running towards the camera with his clothes burned off due to Agent Orange, but that's pretty much nothing compared to all the other photos of Americans holding up disemboweled bodies and kicking corpses. There were horrible pictures of so many children and burning bodies in heaps.... There was a gallery of deformities due to agent orange. You can still see victims of Agent Orange on the streets today. It's impossible not to feel guilty and heartbroken as an American walking through that Museum. I can't believe the Vietnamese even let us into their country so willingly these days. Ben told me it was a similar feeling, being German and walking through the Holocaust Museum and others devoted to the Second World War.
We met up with Quan, a friend of Ben's from Switzerland, who had been studying Chemistry abroad there. We also met up with their friend Thanh who had brought everyone together. She spent the most time in Switzerland and speaks with VERY little accent. She was incredibly sweet and kind to me. We all went out to dinner for spring rolls to this very loud, place where all the young Vietnamese seem to go. The food was delicious and very different than the spring rolls on the street. Quan and Thanh's boyfriend were a bit shier and more comfortable in talking with Ben and Thanh, but they were all very smart and willing to show us how to do things. Thanh's mom met us for coffee and they all talked about the fact that they wanted to start an english club where they would practice English. I would love to get involved with something like that. Quan said that maybe they would help me learn Vietnamese when they all practiced English. Right now I'm in love with their family and Thanh's friends. I just hope my inner introvert won't come out when I least expect it.
It was a great day until.... the mass bombardment of Beau's texts through out the day, asking to meet up, ended in an awkward but firm conversation about the fact that I didn't want to see him. I've never had to break up with a friend before so its a bit of a strange feeling... I've never had the urge to tell someone "stop calling me, I don't want to hear from you" before. He ended up telling me that he thought I was very beautiful and thought we had some a similar outlook on life and he was worried about me because I "looked sad" and i was "suffering from culture shock." I guess, looking bored and like I wanted to get away from a potentially awkward and upsetting circumstance can look something like "sad" and "suffering from culture shock." I can tell he's lonely and I can tell he needs friends here, but that friend is not me. He needs someone that he can hang out with all the time and not feel like he's kind of a bother. He needs a good fuck and I'm DEFINITELY not the one to give it to him.
In truth, I really dont think I am suffering from culture shock. Not like I did in Savannah. In Savannah the differences between Black and White were so subtle and upsetting that I just couldn't understand the discrimination that people seemed to harbor towards me. I wanted so badly just to have friends and enjoy the company of those who I was around, but they wanted nothing to do with me. Here, I feel like this culture is so different and interesting that the horrible isolation that I felt in Savannah sometimes doesn't compare. What exactly is culture shock? I feel incredibly comfortable with the differences between Saigon and DC and I can't figure out why. Is culture shock the massive Ups and Downs that I have felt and are bound to feel? Maybe its because that's to be expected so I don't see that as culture shock.
Um, anyway, my internet isnt working great. I need to find a cheaper hotel. The one that ben is living at was incredibly nice and the family who runs it is absolutely wonderful, but it's a bit of a trek to ILA. I wish the holiday wasn't so soon because rates go up :(
I encountered another side to Vietnam that I was bound to see, but hoped I didn't have to see it this soon. At the temple they forced incense into our hands and a wreathe of flowers to put on the altar. I knew they would make us pay for it, but we walked through the temple without any sort of harassment until the end. They came to the other side and demanded 100.000 dong for the incense, each. I told him it was too much. He took the 500.000d out of my hands, gave me back 200.000 and scooted away before I had a chance to protest or count. I went back up to him and told him he didn't give me enough, he grudgingly gave me 100.000 more. I tried to politely and not so politely demand the other 100.000 he owed me but he feigned ignorance. So ultimately he got away with 10 $ for incense. Granted, I know that's not a lot of money, but here that can go a long way and I only had that 500.000 left for the day. I walked away pissed and kind of hurt, but really, there's nothing more I could do.
Anyways, no use having that ruin your day, so I didn't.
We also went to the Zoo, which was beautiful in terms of the gardens, but the animals were kept in smaller enclosures than they should have been (which i find true for most zoos.) The tigers looked thin and like their back legs had been broken and had never fully healed. Most of the animals in general looked sad, in particular the elephants. They had a sentience in them that I found a little more disturbingly present than most of the other animals. Maybe it's just me searching for it.
The War Remnants museum was more depressing but for very different reasons. They lead you in with the American B52 bombers and various other combat machinery and a ground floor filled with the basic "Americans as well as the entire world opposed this war" agenda. However, the next two floors were filled with photos of the most horrific atrocities that Americans had committed during the war. We all remember the picture of the naked child running towards the camera with his clothes burned off due to Agent Orange, but that's pretty much nothing compared to all the other photos of Americans holding up disemboweled bodies and kicking corpses. There were horrible pictures of so many children and burning bodies in heaps.... There was a gallery of deformities due to agent orange. You can still see victims of Agent Orange on the streets today. It's impossible not to feel guilty and heartbroken as an American walking through that Museum. I can't believe the Vietnamese even let us into their country so willingly these days. Ben told me it was a similar feeling, being German and walking through the Holocaust Museum and others devoted to the Second World War.
We met up with Quan, a friend of Ben's from Switzerland, who had been studying Chemistry abroad there. We also met up with their friend Thanh who had brought everyone together. She spent the most time in Switzerland and speaks with VERY little accent. She was incredibly sweet and kind to me. We all went out to dinner for spring rolls to this very loud, place where all the young Vietnamese seem to go. The food was delicious and very different than the spring rolls on the street. Quan and Thanh's boyfriend were a bit shier and more comfortable in talking with Ben and Thanh, but they were all very smart and willing to show us how to do things. Thanh's mom met us for coffee and they all talked about the fact that they wanted to start an english club where they would practice English. I would love to get involved with something like that. Quan said that maybe they would help me learn Vietnamese when they all practiced English. Right now I'm in love with their family and Thanh's friends. I just hope my inner introvert won't come out when I least expect it.
It was a great day until.... the mass bombardment of Beau's texts through out the day, asking to meet up, ended in an awkward but firm conversation about the fact that I didn't want to see him. I've never had to break up with a friend before so its a bit of a strange feeling... I've never had the urge to tell someone "stop calling me, I don't want to hear from you" before. He ended up telling me that he thought I was very beautiful and thought we had some a similar outlook on life and he was worried about me because I "looked sad" and i was "suffering from culture shock." I guess, looking bored and like I wanted to get away from a potentially awkward and upsetting circumstance can look something like "sad" and "suffering from culture shock." I can tell he's lonely and I can tell he needs friends here, but that friend is not me. He needs someone that he can hang out with all the time and not feel like he's kind of a bother. He needs a good fuck and I'm DEFINITELY not the one to give it to him.
In truth, I really dont think I am suffering from culture shock. Not like I did in Savannah. In Savannah the differences between Black and White were so subtle and upsetting that I just couldn't understand the discrimination that people seemed to harbor towards me. I wanted so badly just to have friends and enjoy the company of those who I was around, but they wanted nothing to do with me. Here, I feel like this culture is so different and interesting that the horrible isolation that I felt in Savannah sometimes doesn't compare. What exactly is culture shock? I feel incredibly comfortable with the differences between Saigon and DC and I can't figure out why. Is culture shock the massive Ups and Downs that I have felt and are bound to feel? Maybe its because that's to be expected so I don't see that as culture shock.
Um, anyway, my internet isnt working great. I need to find a cheaper hotel. The one that ben is living at was incredibly nice and the family who runs it is absolutely wonderful, but it's a bit of a trek to ILA. I wish the holiday wasn't so soon because rates go up :(