Odd
What do you do when you are faced with a life altering choice. You don't know if this is a thing you should do or just wait it out and see. I think that the best thing that I can do right now is hold on and see where this is going to go, since I don't have any idea really how things are on the other end in relation to me. I only really know what's happening with me, and I don't think it's fair that I should look for something that I currently have, but I didn't look for it, it just... fell into my lap. I know that this is really obscure, but I don't know how else to put it without giving away what I plan to the person that I am going to do this for. I just hope that he is ready if we have to do what we are going to end up doing in my mind or... if I am going to be sent away again. I don't think I can do that again. If he wants me to go away once more... I think I will tell him that he will have to come with me or... I'm not coming back. I don't know what else to do and I don't know what else to say but this. I am just trying to work things out in my brain and it's just not working out completely. I hope that things settle down here if nothing more, and the guys can get jobs... that way I don't have to slice my chest open and rip my heart out and leave him. Mikie needs him as much as I do as well, so... I will have to see what happens.