Gone.
Escort, my much beloved buddy, has left the country.
So much of our relationship was based on the eventuality of parting; and it's finally arrived as we knew it would. All the good times have made it worthwhile, I wouldn't change much (if anything) and I know the hurt will go away - eventually. Memories are solid gold and cannot be taken away though and for that I'm very grateful. We are both of a like mind I think and I found more with him than I expected. I'm not falling apart, just feel very alone all of a sudden.
We had dinner at SkyTower restaurant last night. Fitting really. Just a normal fun dinner. Fuckity-fuck-fuck I'm going to miss him. But I'm not going to dwell on it ...
This morning there were cuddles and tears and fun and hugs and tears. I feel like someone took away my favourite toy/book! In truth it's a relief, but still doens't change the facts. Even having found "wonderful" I'm no better off. But perhaps a more confident person. I wish it were different and maybe somewhere in the distant future it will be different.
We both have new places to go to. New challenges to face.
So much else to focus on now going forward. I have more growing to do (metaphorically speaking ... will still be my fun-sized self), having come to know myself better I realise that the things I want are those that I fear the most. And what if, by fate, I now get them ...?
Moving day is Sat 7th Feb if I can get storage and truck hire organised by then. I have a driver and helpers lined up all for the price of a case of beer! So much to do and decisions to make to ensure my plans continue, and more fun can be found later!
12 working days remain.
I interviewed a potential replacement yesterday. Might be confirmed by tomorrow and then the training fun starts.
So much of our relationship was based on the eventuality of parting; and it's finally arrived as we knew it would. All the good times have made it worthwhile, I wouldn't change much (if anything) and I know the hurt will go away - eventually. Memories are solid gold and cannot be taken away though and for that I'm very grateful. We are both of a like mind I think and I found more with him than I expected. I'm not falling apart, just feel very alone all of a sudden.
We had dinner at SkyTower restaurant last night. Fitting really. Just a normal fun dinner. Fuckity-fuck-fuck I'm going to miss him. But I'm not going to dwell on it ...
This morning there were cuddles and tears and fun and hugs and tears. I feel like someone took away my favourite toy/book! In truth it's a relief, but still doens't change the facts. Even having found "wonderful" I'm no better off. But perhaps a more confident person. I wish it were different and maybe somewhere in the distant future it will be different.
We both have new places to go to. New challenges to face.
So much else to focus on now going forward. I have more growing to do (metaphorically speaking ... will still be my fun-sized self), having come to know myself better I realise that the things I want are those that I fear the most. And what if, by fate, I now get them ...?
Moving day is Sat 7th Feb if I can get storage and truck hire organised by then. I have a driver and helpers lined up all for the price of a case of beer! So much to do and decisions to make to ensure my plans continue, and more fun can be found later!
12 working days remain.
I interviewed a potential replacement yesterday. Might be confirmed by tomorrow and then the training fun starts.