100 Days Pt 2
One day, a very obnoxious eric (shocking, isn't it) asked of his 7th grade history teacher, "How are our grades being determined?" He replied with age-riddled tiredness "You're only as good as the last time i check". In 7th grade i heard this and said "screw him if he doesnt want to tell me"
As a 23 yr old I think of this and apply it other places, and it scares me. I'm only as good as the last time my friends remembered me. Also, my "friends" are only as good as the last memories i have of them.... It's true, really. I have great great memories with some of the people at this school, but as of late... I have no want to see or hang out with them because of how they acted in my last memory of them. Will years of fun and good times be discarded due to the fact that when i try to think back of these people... I can only come up with the last distasteful memory? Thats not fair to me, its not fair to them (i guess).
I want to know WHY. Let me get one thing out - I'm not perfect - I know this. I may not always act like i think this, but trust me... I KNOW this. I ask too many questions, i'm too involved, i talk too much, i try to lead too much, i'm a bully, etc etc... but seriously, and to anyone who has really taken the time to KNOW me, regardless of how they feel right this minute.... knows i have a heart of pure gold. my friends are always deep fucking down in my heart... i'm always thinking of them, i may bust your balls about giving you help, but the help is ALWAYS THERE, without question.
As a 23 yr old I think of this and apply it other places, and it scares me. I'm only as good as the last time my friends remembered me. Also, my "friends" are only as good as the last memories i have of them.... It's true, really. I have great great memories with some of the people at this school, but as of late... I have no want to see or hang out with them because of how they acted in my last memory of them. Will years of fun and good times be discarded due to the fact that when i try to think back of these people... I can only come up with the last distasteful memory? Thats not fair to me, its not fair to them (i guess).
I want to know WHY. Let me get one thing out - I'm not perfect - I know this. I may not always act like i think this, but trust me... I KNOW this. I ask too many questions, i'm too involved, i talk too much, i try to lead too much, i'm a bully, etc etc... but seriously, and to anyone who has really taken the time to KNOW me, regardless of how they feel right this minute.... knows i have a heart of pure gold. my friends are always deep fucking down in my heart... i'm always thinking of them, i may bust your balls about giving you help, but the help is ALWAYS THERE, without question.