life
i get so lonely at night that i hear ghosts singing the blues. during the day, i hide behind a smile. and the clock is ticking, this is it, the big show and i'm choking like eminem in 8 mile. doing cheap inhalents like nail polish remover and paint to stop my mind from torturing me. and i know it's bad, it could cause serious health problems, but the voices don't fuck with you like they do with me.
i'm miles behind all my friends. they all have houses, wives, husbands, and children. while i'm just trying to fix this illness so that i can start at the beginning of my life. i've got to say my friends are as loyal as bloodhounds though, and thank God for that.
while i may be mentally ill, my brain is a good one. in 3rd grade i was going to university on the weekends because of how sharp i was. i look at that and think about how my mind is being wasted because most days i'm even too afraid to leave my apartment.
some of the medications i take make me so drowsy i can't keep my eyes open making the day a constant struggle between coffee and anxiety levels. more meds i take make my feet twitch with incredable pain for 3 hours and i have to go through this everyday.
the voices bitch at me for complaining so much, but they're the reason i'm complaining and thats only one of the mindfucks in a shady corner of my brain.
i just want to hit the reset button on the nintendo and start fresh, but this is it, this is my life. and it's the only one i have so i try to make the most of it.
i'm miles behind all my friends. they all have houses, wives, husbands, and children. while i'm just trying to fix this illness so that i can start at the beginning of my life. i've got to say my friends are as loyal as bloodhounds though, and thank God for that.
while i may be mentally ill, my brain is a good one. in 3rd grade i was going to university on the weekends because of how sharp i was. i look at that and think about how my mind is being wasted because most days i'm even too afraid to leave my apartment.
some of the medications i take make me so drowsy i can't keep my eyes open making the day a constant struggle between coffee and anxiety levels. more meds i take make my feet twitch with incredable pain for 3 hours and i have to go through this everyday.
the voices bitch at me for complaining so much, but they're the reason i'm complaining and thats only one of the mindfucks in a shady corner of my brain.
i just want to hit the reset button on the nintendo and start fresh, but this is it, this is my life. and it's the only one i have so i try to make the most of it.