That Time I Was A Door To Door Salesperson
Looking back, I can easily say that the first job I took after dropping out of university was one of the moments my life changed.
I had been sick for a while. After six months spent holed up in my parents house, unable to go outside without having a panic attack, I decided it was time. I knew that I needed to push myself to really get better - and if I didn’t make that effort, nothing anyone else could have done would have helped me.
(It could also have been the fact that my parents didn’t think this was something I would be able to do. I always was stubborn in that sense. Tell me I won’t be able to do something, and I will try my hardest to prove you wrong.)
So there I was for four months, with the most challenging job I had ever had. I, along with my extreme social anxiety disorder, had become a door to door salesperson.
Talk about going from one extreme to the next.
Sometimes, Baby Steps Suck
There’s nothing wrong with easing yourself into things. Except when you’re like me and are really good out of talking yourself out of doing something that terrifies you. In those cases, baby steps really suck. They offer too much room for self doubt and allowed me the time to talk myself out of something, while overanalyzing every little thing.
Which is how I went from hiding in my parents’ house to spending 8 hours a day, 6 days a week, travelling around town knocking on doors, selling items no one really wanted anyway.
It wasn’t easy, especially at first. In fact, it was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. But forcing myself out of my comfort zone every day and putting myself in situations where I had to overcome my fears was a sure fire way to help me learn how to deal with social anxiety. If you’ve ever gone door to door, or have done any kind of hard selling, you know that it can be quite intimidating, especially when one is already dealing with anxiety issues.
Sometimes, it just takes one person.
As intimidating as this was, it ended up being exactly what I needed - a way to immunize myself to any negative vibes other people may have been sending my way. I learned to brush off the doors closed in my face, the annoyed responses, the negative connotations. And for every dozen people who didn’t want to talk to you, there was one person whose kindness would make everything worth it, who would completely negate everything bad that happened before them.
While this was a scary time for me, it helped me develop some skills that I can still use. Most importantly, I know that it was one of the first steps in a life-long battle to combating my social anxiety on a daily basis.
Originally published at Once Upon A Bookshelf. Please leave any comments there.